I spoke to my husband Friday night. I explained to him that I am not jealous of his girlfriend and that my only concern is our daughters health. I told him it hurts me to think that he feels I am self diagnosing my daughter, and that I have showed him the doctors papers before and that he apparently wants to see her have surgery and be in pain. He said that no he does not and if I bring the doctors papers to the contempt of court hearing on tuesday that he will make sure he follows the orders.

He also let me know that he fell head over heals for this girl right away and that the feeling he has for her he has never ever experienced in such a way even with me. He doesn't realize it's infatuation only because she's meeting his emotional needs right now. My friend spoke with him on that and tried to tell him it's only temporary.

Yes, I forgave her. Doesn't mean I'm going to trust her, but our daughters can continue to be best friends. I will just limit my conversation to her at all.

SO after I spoke to WS I was sad, I told my daughter it looks like it's over, daddy has moved on. She said "mommy, satan is the ruler of doubt, are you giving up on God ? I said no, then she said, pray mommy, daddy can't come back now he's serving satan. You and I love God, and he'll make it the best he can, daddy's not the best yet." I couldn't help but hug her. She's right and I'm so glad she listens when I speak so that she can help me when I'm down as well.

So tomorrow is the contempt of court. I've been accused 3 times, hopefully the lawyers will prove that I was looking out for the best interest of my daughter. The last custody hearing the court official didn't change anything, So the judges orders say I must let Katie go there. I have to trust that God will protect her for me.

Please keep us in your prayers, as god as told me, after I prayed very hard for our relationship, This was my fortune for that day.... "It's not over yet, let's stick with it."

I won't quit praying for him until he's led to salvation. Maybe oneday he'll understand, maybe he won't, but On friday I get the final divorce papers to sign.... Great christmas present......

INeed,

I'll be saying some extra prayers for you & Katie today. Hope all goes well in court.


{{{INeed}}}

The court system in our state is a joke. I have to let Katie go and they are not even going to make him give her her medicines or follow the diet.

Luckily, he is in a kindhearted mood and says that he'll make sure she gets them. I will trust her since I have to let her go according to the judge.

So She goes from Friday thru monday night. We agreed until 10pm at court. So today he calls and asks her to tell me he needs to bring her home early on Monday. Seems he's not going to take her to his girlfriends family event after all.
He said " Tell mommy you'll be home between 5:30 and 6: pm" I said, mommy won't be home then, I have a date to go out for chinese and to the movies and then to church. I asked what part of town he had to go to. I said, that works out fine, you can drop her off at the movies then.

He said , "Ok, tell mommy I'll drop you off at her friends house. I said, they have a party the same night and won't be home, I'm going with someone else. Immediately, you hear the tone of voice perk up and its a low drawn out... OOOHHHH who is it Katie.

I should have told her to tell him it's none of his business. She told him it's Jim, Sean and Brian. His voice changed then and suddenly he had to go. Maybe he'll come to realization that I'm not waiting right now, I've listen to him and I'm moving on like he requested.

At the court house I asked to speak to the OW. I introduced myself to her. I let her know that I knew that her husband left due to an affair. I let her know that I am sorry for her pain as I have experienced it myself. Then I let her know that the same exact weekend one year to the date she went on vaccation with my husband, he took me to the same place and slept with my friend at that hotel. She said, " I know he has told me everything, you can't tell me anything I don't already know." I replied, that is a relief, I was afraid he didn't tell you about the girlfriend in arizona, maryland, ohio, the lab where he works, pittsburgh, I am so glad he's shared that he's been with 8 other people besides you since he left me, and I'm glad that you know he slept with someone the day after thanksgiving.

You could tell she didn't know. THe tears formed in her eyes and I felt bad, but she needed warned. If she stays in it, then it's her fault.

I had told him over the weekend how I was struggling and it's either pay the mortgage or pay for christmas presents. He told me to pay the mortgage and not worry about presents he didn't care if his daughter had any. So I had a slight mean streak at the court house. I know she has two little ones, so I reminded WS that he said he would rather me spend the money on the mortgage so his DD would find out that there will be no special visitor this holiday. He said that's fine, until she said " She can't do that...what about ......" He could care less whether his daughter has presents, but bought all kinds for the other two. He said that he'll give me presents on friday when I drop her off...he made it seem like a big thing having to pay for the attorney. I just looked at him and said, geeze you make 25.00 per hour I made 9.00 until your mom called work and got me demoted and now I make minimum wage, but I pay for a house, the second mortgage, all the utilities, all of her daycare, all the food, take her to movies and still have to pay the attorney and you are worried because you have to pay 500 for child support and your attorney, You live rent free and have no bills.

Seems he's been going to the casino alot again. Going to work in WV tomorrow and I'm sure he'll stop at the casino again. It makes me so angry and yet I can't seem to yell or let it out.

And as bad and mad at him as I am, I still want him back....


WHY ????? I can't seem to get it ????? I don't need him, I'm doing fine...I'm happy...I'm Healthy....so WHY ????

All I can do is pray that God walks beside me, that God is my mighty counselor and attorney, and that somehow WS heart will be touched and he'll remember the love we shared and want to come home and give his heart completely to God...

He lives with OW now....is it time to give up completely ? Is there still some chance ???

Actually it is better that they live together. That will end the affair sooner. Hang in there. Most affairs end in under a couple of years. Don't give up a day before the miracle.

Ineed,

It is time to let him go. Let him fall. Let him hit rock bottom and start PROTECTING yourself and Katie as best you can.

Start living YOUR life as though he does not exist.

I'm not saying to give up hope, but it is waay past time to protect yourself much better. You've continued to mire yourself in his drama and he is eating it up with a spoon.

Truly and completely give him over to God.

The Lord is with you ALWAYS.

Blessings and Merry Christmas to you & Katie! I'll be thinking about you both.

Hope everyone had a nice christmas !!!

My WS had dd for 4 days per the judges orders. I try to get emergency custody and they just left everything the same. So I was nice... he agreed to give her her medicines and follow the diet.

MISTAKE #! - trusting a WS.

He took her to all kinds of houses with animals and set off her alergies. He fed her the foods that are not allowed on her diet. He did not take the inhalers with him, but he overdosed her on allergy medicine and did not pay attention to the laxatives and gave her to much.

He wanted her so bad, and drops her off somewhere else so that he could go party without her. He was to have her til 10:30 Christmas eve, he called that morning and said he decided he was dropping her off early. I said that unfortunately I could not swing by because I had a date for chinese, movies and church. He assumed I was going with my best friend. Was he shocked when he found out I wasn't.

I got all goddessed up. Went out and bought a low cut blouse that really showed off my weight loss. When he got there I put all her stuff in the trunk and he really looked at me. He said, are you really going in there to the movies? I said, I told you I was meeting some people here. Then he said, and you are going dressed like that ? I looked and said "I'm dressed and here already, so yes, I am wearing what I wanted." He kept looking and his girlfriend kept eying me up. She is really plain looking, no makeup or anything, and she wasn't dressed up at all. I don't think she liked the way he looked at me, but I did.

After he left DD kept complaining about her foot, so I carried her thinking it was her shoes. At night she had me rub her knee that kept hurting her and her foot. I didn't have the light on, but next morning I saw the huge bruise and her swollen foot and off to the ER we went on Christmas day. Seems he brought her back to me with a sprained knee and severly sprained and fractured ankle. I had her to the orthopedic specialist today. Cat scan on friday and then we will discuss surgery.

I called my WS to see what she had done. He had no clue and seemed to think I was making it up. I offered to meet him at Mcdonald's to show him the xrays. He told DD he couldn't wait to see her on the crutches. Then he told her to put me on the phone. He said, " This won't be a PFA violation right ? I don't want a record." I said no it's not because it's about custody and her medical problems. He said he'd be right over. I then told him that he already has something on file and that's why the last hearing was continued. He got flustered and hung up on me.
He didn't show like he promised DD, and she was upset. Then I get an email asking me not to call him again and he never wants to speak with me again. I didn't do anything. Don't understand what's going thru his head.

So DD and I went shopping. She let me know that while she was with WS he told her that mommy needs to find a boyfriend and it's okay for me to date. I reminded her that daddy is not following God right now. I reminded her of the 10 commandments. I asked her if it would be right for mommy to break a commandment, and she said no. So I told her that we just have to pray for daddy's salvation and that his eyes would be opened to see the lords ways.

She was so upset tonight. She can't understand why daddy lied about wanting to see her. She told me when she called him that he told her that he said he wasn't coming. She was smart enough to say "If you would have said you weren't coming mommy wouldn't have sat looking out the window waiting for you at mcdonald's for over 1/2 hour when we could have been somewhere else." He didn't have an answer for her there. She didn't want to call to say goodnight and I told her she didn't have to.

I did call and leave a message with my attorneys secretary. I'm sure this instance may help my custody case. I just wish it didn't have to happen.

So, what happened to Katie's knee and broken foot? Did you ask Katie about it?

"After he left DD kept complaining about her foot, so I carried her thinking it was her shoes. At night she had me rub her knee that kept hurting her and her foot. I didn't have the light on, but next morning I saw the huge bruise and her swollen foot and off to the ER we went on Christmas day. Seems he brought her back to me with a sprained knee and severly sprained and fractured ankle."

Why does a young innocent child have to suffer all night with a fractured ankle? Why could you not look at the ankle and take her to ER right then? Was it that hard to turn on a light and examine it?

I hurt for your daughter. It seems you are so focused on dating and showing your WS that you are sexy that you forgot about looking at Katie's injury.

Then it appears you took Katie shopping with a BROKEN ANKLE! Geeze. What is UP with you.

If she can tell you she is upset if Daddy lies about seeing her SURELY she has the intelligence to tell you what happened to break her ankle!

What is going on here!?

Did you ask Katie why her ankle was broken yet? I am sure she could tell you. Try and ask her.

I didn't take Katie shopping. I went shopping the day before. When he dropped Katie off we went to the movies and then to church and then home. WHen she complained about her foot she didn't make it seem like it was really bad and she had brand new shoes on. I thought it was from the shoes which is why I carried her then. She didn't say her ankle she said her foot. She fell asleep in church and I put her into her bed sleeping. She woke up at 3 am with it hurting. She's in a growth spurt and I thought it could be that then. It was when she went to stand in the morning that I noticed how bad it hurt her when she went to walk. I looked really closely and took her immediately.

I found out she fell dancing on Saturday and she told them about it and she was left to go then because she was afraid to speak with her daddy. SHe watched him smack his girlfriends daughter for whining and so she was afraid to tell because she didn't want smacked.

I felt awful for making her wait, because I would have taken her immediately if I would have realized.

At least you found out what happened. You cannot really blame your husband for not getting Katie to the Dr for the fractured ankle since you did not know about it or do anything about it at first either.

I dont feel sorry for you. I dont feel sorry for your Husband. I really feel sad for Katie and sorry for her. She has to live with parents like you two. So busy with thier own drama.

Also, you have Katie so indoctrinated in your religion how will she be able to relate to normal children....I feel sad about that too.

But this is stricty my own opinion. No one has to feel like I do. I feel for children.

Wow.

It seems as though you are really out to get this lady. You don't really know what exactly went on in this situation and she doesn't need to defend her actions to you. I think it was generous of her to have even gone out of her way to state it was not her intention to overlook her injury.

From her other posts, she clearly does not appear to be a woman who neglects her child. So I really think you should lay off a bit.

Furthermore, people do walk around with fractures and have NO IDEA because it doesn't feel as painful as they think a broken bone would. It feels more like a sprain.

Also, you have no right to question her raising her child in her Christian faith, we all have that right as Americans.

From some of your other posts, I thought you were a Christian (it seems I might have misunderstood though).

Anyway, how would you feel if some random person who didn't even know you told you that you were ruining your child and making them "unable to relate to other children"?

Seriously, I think you are being completely rude to INAH.

I love God. But read about what this poster says her child is saying much of the time. The child is using indoctrinated concepts to explain everything. To herself. Perhaps that is not all bad as it does give the child some sort of explanation.

For example, the child states"

"Mommy, we will pray that Daddy comes back from Satan"

"Mommy, daddy is in Satans control, he will come back to Jesus"

There are many more of these statements from the daughter. The mom seems to explain her husband's absences by telling the daughter he is possessed by Satan and just will come back to God.

I dont know I just dont like this kind of talk from a 7 year old. It does not seem healthy. I take your word for it about the broken ankle. I guess both parents could have missed that.

Yes I am being rude. This woman is trying to impress her EX with her dress, etc to try and get him back. But getting him back will hurt the child. I just dont understand it.

Like I say, it is just my opinion. I have seen young children indoctrinated in religion and It is not pretty. Satan is the total explanation for bad things. The kid never learns to be confident, develop inner strength, or cope with the world as it is. They end up with an over emphasis on religion. This causes an unbalanced personality.

Not that I want to T/J here...

But, I'm not sure how familiar you are with your bible or even if you believe it is the word of God. However if you love the God of the bible and do believe that book is inspired by Him, then you should know that gives two explanations for the evil in this world. The first is Satan and the other is our fallen nature.

Both pretty much work in tandem to cause massive destruction and misery where ever possible.

So INAH's statement that her WH is under the influence of evil forces is not at all off base or inaccurate according to the bible.

1 John 5:18-19 "We know that whoever is born of God does not sin; but he who has been born of God keeps himself, and the wicked one does not touch him.

We know that we are of God, and the whole world lies under the sway of the wicked one."

Acts 17-18 Jesus said to Paul "I now send you, to open their eyes, in order to turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan to God, that they may receive forgiveness of sins and an inheritance among those who are sanctified by faith in Me."

These are only two of many verses that back up this position. I can provide you with more if you would like. Better yet, go to Blue Letter Bible and type in satan and you will find all of them.

So INAH is totally correct in her assessment of the situation and she is teaching her daughter to pray for her father. That is completely honorable and noble. And God does see it.

She is simply doing what any devout Christian mother would do.

I hear you and understand your point Sara....even if I dont agree 100%.

We had the PFA hearing and the judge ruled that it was not a PFA matter, but a custody matter in stead. SO no DD has to have weekend visits again until our hearing in March.

I had contacted my WS and said that I am ready to grant his divorce and to go over the matters of what needs seperated and asked to meet him. He will under no circumstances meet with me because the divorce is no longer important to him right now.

Go figure, it's the control issue. I want it so now he doesn't. DD also told me that on her weekend with Daddy he was arguing with his girlfriend, they barely spoke and he didn't kiss and hug her like crazy like he normally does.

I said thank you Lord. I know he has a long way to go before he'd ever end up home. But when he couldn't speak with his DD it was finally enabling him to go towards rock bottom, and I actually saw him Cry like I never have before.

God is still giving me signs to not give up the fight, and to keep faith in HIM. I am doing that. Some say that I'm crazy, but if God reaches my Husband and Leads him home, then I will honor GOD and take him back.

Of course it would take awhile to prove to me that God's leading his life and not himself. I would not just let him say that he's sorry and come back right away. There will be counseling, and dating, and a trust that he'll have to build again...

Took DD to the hospital for a Bone scan of her foot. It's not healing right. DD was scared because she had to get a shot. She wanted WS there. We called, but it was not important enough for him at this time.

I took off work to be there for her shot, but had my mom come for the scan so that I could go back to work and not miss the 4 hours.

We called WS last night then. We were on our way to help my friend out. She and her 2 children will be homeless as of Wednesday. I am doing my best to help her find housing. God answered one prayer...he found her a full time job.

So on the way there as DD spoke with WS he asked what she was doing. She said we are going to help Sharon out. WS said, I don't know any Sharon's who is she ? DD said mommy met her at divorce care. Mommy has tons of friends now and we are helping her because she and her children won't have a place to live on wednesday and they need us. WS kept grilling her more about who this person was and who my other friends are.

I asked DD then to please not talk about mommy's friends. I told her that daddy doesn't need to know who my friends are now, because he chose to leave us to lead a new life.

It made me feel good that he's asking though. After what DD told me about her weekend there. With the way that WS has been checking me out, and now this, I have more hope.

I am going to work on my house this weekend, getting rid of more I don't need, and I'm looking for a new place to move to.

We'll go to the doctors this week and find out more about her foot.

WS did not listen to the doctors from the court ordered visit. I did not remind him of that like I normally do, but am keeping a list for the custody hearing at the end of March....

My Husband is in that man somewhere, I just pray that God can bring him back out again. If not, then I know I am better off without him, but it still hurts ....

We had the PFA hearing and the judge ruled that it was not a PFA matter, but a custody matter in stead. SO no DD has to have weekend visits again until our hearing in March.

I had contacted my WS and said that I am ready to grant his divorce and to go over the matters of what needs seperated and asked to meet him. He will under no circumstances meet with me because the divorce is no longer important to him right now.

Go figure, it's the control issue. I want it so now he doesn't. DD also told me that on her weekend with Daddy he was arguing with his girlfriend, they barely spoke and he didn't kiss and hug her like crazy like he normally does.

I said thank you Lord. I know he has a long way to go before he'd ever end up home. But when he couldn't speak with his DD it was finally enabling him to go towards rock bottom, and I actually saw him Cry like I never have before.

God is still giving me signs to not give up the fight, and to keep faith in HIM. I am doing that. Some say that I'm crazy, but if God reaches my Husband and Leads him home, then I will honor GOD and take him back.

Of course it would take awhile to prove to me that God's leading his life and not himself. I would not just let him say that he's sorry and come back right away. There will be counseling, and dating, and a trust that he'll have to build again...

Picked Katie up from her weekend with her father. She was sick on wednesday and was on her medication for her asthma. I emailed WS friday morning to let him know exactly what times the medications were given so that he knew when to give her hers.

He went to the court ordered doctors appointments and the judge told him he will follow the diet and medicines as per the doctors orders.

Well.... I knew better.... I asked him last night for times that he gave her medicines and asked when one specific one was given with the nebulizer unit. I was told she didn't need it and he wasn't going to give it to her.
I let him know that we were told when she's sick to give it to her as a preventative so she doesn't get bad. I wrote it down and he asked why I was writing it. I advised so I knew what to tell my attorney. He told me I could take my attorney and stick him up my F'in A**. He was screaming that at me in front of Katie.

He didn't give her her reflux medicine or her inhalers, and we ended up at the ER today with a asthma attack that her nebulizer unit at home would not stop.

I just need prayers that my attorney can work his magic now so that custody will be revoked. She doesn't need to be around anyone like that. She said that he is fighting with the OW more now. I know that could be a good thing, but I don't need him in our life like that at all !!!!

I will still pray that the Lord turns him around, but I need to get my daughter to safety no matter what it costs. She may end up being mad at me if I manage to get the custody revoked, but years from now she'll thank me.

Please keep her in your prayers. Also when we saw the specialist, the ankle is not healing so now we see a surgeon on Feb 20th.

I just can't wait to see the rainbow thru these clouds. I know it's there somewhere.