Is he poor? Can he not afford a movie or lunch in the interim. I think a month is a long time to go before a second date without and obvious reason.
I don't think he's poor. And really lunch isn't mega $$$. Since it was dark I couldn't make out if his truck was older or not. He was dressed nicely, and ordered a nice dinner. Job wise, he talked like he likes what he does, though he didn't brag or boast about the financial end of it. Though, He did mention that when he travels (he's semi self-emplyed) he stays at very low end hotels. Was that an indicator?
If it turns out that I do like him, and he is poor, that could be an issue. Not that I want someone w/tons of money, but I am use to a certain lifestyle. That's the main reason WH and I are still legally M. To alot of people I am very well off financially. Once I get D, that could change.
I had a date Friday (w/someone else) and I had no problem buying him a few drinks, I didn't expect him to pay for everything. And I had a nice time, we shared conversation it wasn't all 1 sided, I had a chance to ask questions and so did he. I've known him for quite a few years so it wasn't like the other guy,we were pretty comfortable w/each other already.
My gut says he is dating "someone", maybe it's not serious, but he doesn't want to jeopardize it either. I could be wrong.
If he pushes for SF while at his house for your second date, I'd have to cut my losses and move on at that time, I think.
ABSOLUTELY !! I have to get to know him or anyone I choose to date b-4 I hop into bed. And maybe he's just playing the aloof game and then he'll pounch on me. I'm treating this one a little differently, I have no problem walking out the door and deleting him from my "phonebook" if necessary. And really since I'm not even sure that I like him, having SF w/him is not an option for him.
Update - He texted Monday, called Tues, then nothing. Called Sat. to confirm the dinner/date.
He called around 5 last Sat and again this Sat. Weird that it was the same time of day..
CharlieThree:
) Jittery, non-stop talk means he was nervous.
OR it could be arrogance and ego (like WH)
The sexual advances would be normal for a lonely guy who hasn't had a date in awhile... remember guys tend to be more "horny" if you get my drift
True, or he could be testing the waters to see if I'm "easy", One of his texts also had a sexual tone, which I just brushed off. I don't want to date someone who hops into bed on the 1st date or so.
this guy did all the talking during the date... he texted you a bunch of times... you have never initiated contact... what is motivating him to ask you out sooner? confident men have no problem making all the moves and would probably have made more by now... this guy sounds almost shy with a fake exterior
What is motivating him? I have no idea. Maybe it's MY being "aloof"..some guys really like "chasing" a women. Maybe, other women he's met, have chased after him, he is cute.
I hope you are right about the being shy and a fake exterior. I really want to avoid a man like my WH. It scares the crap out of me, and MAYBE I am being overly protective of myself.
[quote] here is a test... shoot him a quick email... ask him out to lunch or something simple... if he agrees quickly, then i'd be willing to bet that i'm right
CharlieThree - You are so smart...I have thought of doing just that, but then, there goes my aloof attitude, don't wanna chase him. Heck, I'm not even sure I like him yet !!!
Yet, that would be a good test. If I have time this week, I will send a text confirming our dinner date, say hey, I'm in the area, wanna met for a quick drink, and see what happens.
