Had to call my Mom again this morning. She doesn't know what to say. Except that men are not big talkers and that they hold their emotions inside. Maybe WS will eventually realize what he is doing to me. I sure hope so.

I think I may have reached a stage of anger. I got mad this afternoon. Really mad. That rage carried me through this evening and really helped me when another friend called me tonight. She had just found out about my situation and was calling to offer support. We are going shopping tomorrow and to check out the decorations on Rodeo Drive. I so love Barneys and Saks. And good smelling, good looking gay men who want to put makeup on you. *sigh* I'm excited.

Frazier said to take each day 1 hr at a time. Then 1 day at a time. Frazier is the property mgr for my apt bldg. I'm gonna buy some Christmas cards & send some cards to the friends and people who have been there for me these past 2 months. Which gives me another goal to accomplish! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

Hey LA!

Good for you!!! I'm glad that you're doing better. I saw your other post on the National Geographic special... Congratulations!!!

Semper Fi,

RIF

Hey RIF, does my spouse have to be there at pass & ID to renew my military ID card? Is there a form he can sign or something?

Hey LA,

No. All he needs to do is sign the form and you should be able to get your ID card. I've done it for Mrs. RIF several times when I was away for training or deployment.

Semper Fi,

RIF

If you feel like you are having some sort of 'attack' on a regular basis. say, everytime you have a alone moment, which in my life is my shower time, and you cry the entire time, like wishing you didnt have to get out, but know that you have to because the water will starting turning cold......Is this the point that you need to see someone? and if so, who? I need something to calm down

ItsPouring...my attacks happened when I was by myself. My therapist told me that I needed to get out of my apt & do something. I didn't cry in the shower, it was the rest of the time.

And if you feel you need to see someone, do it. I highly recommend counseling. Mine has helped me so much. And medication didn't really help me. It made me feel drunk/high all the time. So I quit. But the therapist has saved my sanity. I love her.

Who? A psychotherapist, psychiatrist, licensed clinical therapist...look in the phonebook for them or ask your regular MD. Also, your MD can Rx something for you if you need meds.

I have not cried in 3 days. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I am so happy to hear that LA!

As someone who has experienced anxiety and panic attacks myself, I sympathize with you. All of the advice so far has been great. I finally got a grip on mine by taking Effexor XR. I tried dealing with it for two years though before taking the antidepressant. I also lost a lot of weight and was too skinny and tired all the time.

The not eating only makes it worse. Low bloodsugar triggers anxiety. If you find yourself not able to eat, at least drink something like Ensure to help you get some nutrition.

Another friend told me about Ensure. The past 2 days I have actually eaten.

One of the Rx's the Dr. gave me was Effexor XR. It made me zombie-ish & I quit taking it. But I feel better this week.

I started to read Love Busters and I couldn't even read the table of contents or the first chapter without starting to shake and perspire profusley. Tried to read the chapter about family and friends and had to put the book down because I was so dizzy and nauseated. It's so overwhelming to read this & it's one thing after another that me, he, we have done to each other.

I wish I could stop the panic. I just wish I could stop the shaking.

Hey LA,

Have you talked with your Dr. about this? I hope you're feeling better...

Oh, the form you need for a new ID card is the DD Form 1173. I think that your H will have to sign it and then you can take it to the nearest ID card office and have a new ID card made. All of your information should already be loaded in DEERS...

Hope you get to feeling better.

Semper Fi,

RIF

Try deep breathing exercises. Do it about 3 times. Don't hallucinate. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> If you like essential oils, lavender is calming. There are other oil combinations to help you relax. Also if you haven't already been put on AD's. Try St John's wort (herbal remedy - check it out at the health food store). Limit your time in the sun though. Best to see a doctor.

If you need to cry, cry..... I had anxiety attacks on a regular basis for about 4 months. They eventually subsided. Know that this is how your body is dealing with the stress. Listen to it.

Hugz,
L.

The first time I was in the hospital and in the middle of a major meltdown the nurse sat down by me and told me to breathe evenly and slowly. My BP that night was really high.

But I call him and then I get very anxious while I'm waiting to see if he'll even call me back. I wonder if he doesn't call me back on purpose because he knows I'll get this way. But I try not to think that he would be so cruel to me.

Don't call him to help calm you down. As a WS, he is toxic for you. Bad medicine. Stay away from the WS.

L.

I just reread that again. My mom mentioned that he might be in a male midlife crisis. I told her that he should've just bought a convertible then. But I just spent the last hour reading about "male menopause" and it described him perfectly. And it also said to be kind, loving, supportive but to be strong too. He doesn't know what he is thinking right now.

From now on when I have questions about our finances, his deployment etc...I'm just going to email him.

It made me feel better. Reading that article & coming here & knowing I'm not the only one that feels like they are drowning.

This roller coaster of emotions has to end. Last night my therapy lady called & I told her what my mom said & she said it's possible he's like that.

And then this morning I get up & I'm all shakey again. And I ate a tiny bit of dinner last night. Hoping that I wouldn't wake up in a panic with my heart racing. My hands are shaking.

Panic attacks are what xanax is for. Have you seen a psychiatrist about this and told them what you are experiencing?

Personally, I buy Ensure by the case at Costco.


This is almost certainly true, and he can't help you. You need to help yourself.

You can get a prescription for Xanax by walking into your doctor's office or any Urgent Care Center or emergency room and telling them you are having unrelenting anxiety and panic attacks.

I have such attacks, too. I've taken Xanax and it does work but I sure don't like it.

I also use:

1) Kava. This is a non-addictive anxiolytic, but you MUST be very careful if you are a female of childbearing age. Do a Google search and read up on it.

2) "Tension Tamer" tea, made by Celestial Seasonings. You can find this in some grocery stores but if you go to the website you can order a stronger version (and it works a lot better.) Makes a great chaser with the Kava. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Some people also use an herbal preparation called Rescue Remedy, but I have never tried this one.

Hang in there. The panic attacks are nature's way of telling you that you're in a bad situation and you need to FIGHT or RUN! But you can't do either, so the body goes into overdrive and blows the lid off. That's what the panic attack is all about.

Keep posting and let us know how you're doing.
Mulan