Hello Mopey,
I have never posted to you but have read your threads and was feeling so hopeful for you and Windstopped.

Have you considered a Plan B? I wonder if deliberately cutting off contact with Windstopped might not help you at least get some emotional rest. As it is, you seem to have hit and miss contact that of course, leaves you in terrible turmoil.

In reality then, it won't matter what he decides or wants about a "deadline". You take care of yourself and if he sincerely decides he wants to work on the marriage that will be fine. If "his" deadline arrives and he decides he doesn't....well....he doesn't.

It seems to me that Plan B could be effective for you. I understand that it is really meant to help end an affair, but I know too that it is meant to protect any remaining love you have for your partner. You are not only protected from HIS love busters, but you are not able to inadvertently or otherwise love bust him.

IMVVHO, you have been fabulous and patient and deserve the best.
Praying for you.

WH2LE

Hey WhoMe and W2LE.....

Thank you for the kind words, hugs, and prayers. It really does mean a lot to me. And welcome to my thread W2LE.

And thank you too, TST. I don't think we'll be posting on each other's threads anymore.

As far as a plan B? Yeah, I've thought about it and haven't made any decisions on that yet. It's been less than two weeks and I want to get past this test before I think any more about it.

Windstopped has already said that there are certain things he's not willing to do, to help me recover and feel safe. So, I'm not sure if I even want to give him another chance back into my heart. What's the point? It'll just be more rejection. I have been rejected by him one too many times.

I am praying constantly for guidance, while continuing to do the things to get me to the other side of this pain and limbo. I know God doesn't like divorce but I think he'll care more about me than my broken vows. I hope so anyway. That's always been troubling for me.....wondering if God would bless me if I let him down.

I have to get back to the books. I keep reading the same paragraph over and over again..........

Mopey,

I haven't really followed your thread... so this will be short and sweet....

My WW set a date of June 1st to "re-evaluate if we want to get back together or stay separated"... She doesn't know it yet.... but I'm on my own time line with my own plan... not hers... Her June 1st means nothing to me...

I still haven't exposed the affair... Mainly because that's the advice I got from Jennifer... I'm going to expose when I go into plan B...


So... My "June 1st" is when I decide it is.... not when she decides it is....(If you don't understand ... It's a time space continuum thing...Just go with it...) LOL

Lol.....again.....I understand.

And I agree with you. I am on my own time line as well, which is however long it takes, so.....that keeps me sane and the pressure off of me. I know I am doing the best I can with what knowledge I have and I keep putting one foot in front of the other every day.

Thanks for pointing out that you feel the same.

Mopey,

I am sorry you are having such a hard time right now. I feel for ya, girl! I hope that things will turn around for you soon. I have so much respect for you that you continue to go to school and be a better person even though you are hurting so badly! You are a wonderful person and deserve the very best!

((((((mopey))))))

Thanks LaLa. This is an extremely difficult time and I really appreciate your support.

For interest I thought I'd add this, you don't have to read it though, just interesting I thought......

For my test tomorrow, I had to study about contracts. In the discussion, the book talked about fraud. I just copied and pasted from my notes.

Sounds like what happened to me when I took my marriage vows. I should be ok with this part of my test tomorrow since this was easy to understand.

Fraud – cheating. Can be a criminal and civil offense.

Fraud is intended.

Fraud is…..

False statement (Lie)

False statement of a fact

Material; has to be an important fact (like you’ve been promised waterfront property and you get a swamp)

There are damages.

Fraud in the execution – a misrepresentation that deceives the other party as to the very nature of the contract; renders the agreement void.

Fraud in the inducement – misrepresentation regarding the subject matter of a contract that induces the other party to enter into the contract; renders the contract voidable.

Misrepresentation – some positive statement or conduct that is not in accord with the fact.

And some other terms regarding contracts.....

Misrepresentation is not intended.

Concealment – action taken to keep another from learning of a fact.

Fiduciary – person who owes a duty of trust, loyalty, and confidence to another.

Fact – an event that took place or a thing that exists.
Opinion – belief in the existence of a fact or a judgment as to value.

Puffing – sales talk that is considered general bragging or overstatement.

Material – of substantial importance; likely to induce a reasonable person to enter into the contract.

Scienter – guilty knowledge

Justifiable reliance – reasonably influenced by the misrepresentation

Negligent misrepresentation - made without due care.

Innocent misrepresentation – misrepresentation made without knowledge of its falsity but with due care.

That was you guys lesson for today.


I pray you and W2S are well.

I remember that from my paralegal studies. Legal terminology is a whole nother language. Applying it to real life situations does make the understanding easier. Except when you get to the Latin stuff. Yuck!