Zeke,

I think you need to ask your self what you are afraid of here.

Are you afraid that if you insist on NC that your wife will leave you, divorce you?

If so then ask yourself, Do I really want to remain married to a woman who doesn't value me, doesn't appreciate me, and for whom I have less importance that her job?

So get your plan in place and make sure that your boundaries are clearly defined and that the consequences are also clear and understandable.

Then, be prepared to enforce the boundaries and execute the consequences if the boundaries are violated.

Don't set boundaries that you are not 100% capable of enforcing. Give her zero wiggleroom and remember that you are fighting for your marriage.

You need to be strong. FWIW, most women have real trouble respecting a man who appears weak and indecisive. If we don't respect you, well it is hard to be attracted to you.

Best,

Who

Well I'm not a vet, so take this with a grain of salt but I think she might be fooling herself into thinking she can handle it - but she's just making things harder on herself and putting the marriage at risk unnecessarily. Based on what the Harley's say about no contact and special rules for people who have a higher tendency to cheat, it would seem that the largest part of resisting temptation is to not put yourself in stupid situations in the first place.

After all, if you're diabetic you don't sit a chocolate cake on your desk all day patting yourself on the back for not eating it. That's just asking for trouble, not to mention torturing yourself.