Yeah, he "gets it" in most ways but I don't think he likes to do anything that requires effort. Not meaning to DJ there but it is what it is. He sees me getting down or pulling away and he will do the minimum to pull me back in. I am at a point that I don't care to put too much effort in, KWIM? My kids are happy. We live pretty peacefully under one roof but my hope for a happy M is slipping.
Enjoy that dinner out!
Does this go in cycles?
I think I understand what you are saying. I was lazy in the early years. One of the reasons I stay on MB is to remind me of what happens when a person gets lazy. I still get her flowers for no reason - but sometimes I go a few weeks not thinking about it, and I have to wake up, and get with it.
Any way, back to the question about it going in cycles. There are times we still do things that drive the other nuts, or hurts the other. Less often, and less intense, but it still happens. I have worried for a long time about your last sentence. At least both of us try - even if we slip from time to time.
I am amazed at how well Dr Harley gets it........ all of it. Radical honesty keeps things from getting past the point of no return. Meeting needs, and avoiding Love Busters does create feelings of love, and closeness. We have to be willing to apply it, but it works. It helps me to be a little older, and have some experience behind me. I don't think I could have made it work had I read Harley's books when I was in my 20's.
I guess I want to encourage you. All of us have both good and bad parts to us. I am sure your H is the same. I know prayer helps, and example. Not that you should be a door mat, but my W was patient with me, and she turned the other cheek for a long time before I stepped up and did my part. I will be forever grateful for her patience.
With God, no good deed goes unpunished.
(meaning.......... the blessings always come.)
When you get down, come talk as long as you want. I was teasing you about the invite for dinner, but only half teasing. Maybe we'll make it work sometime. My W and I have met many of our MB friends, and it has always been delightful.
Have a wonderful weekend.
Get lots done, watch the magic that is children, and be glad your H has some good in him.
SS
