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Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 895
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Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 895 |
I totally agree with MWIL. Your counselor is NOT a pro marriage counselor. He is a divorce counselor. If you can afford it, call the Harleys yesterday. If you can't afford it, borrow the money. It will be worth it to save your family.
Say
Me, BW-57
FWH 54
4 kids and 4 grandbabies between us
In recovery since D-day, May 28,2007
FWH never onboard the MB boat but still clinging to the side.
One day at a time by God's grace.
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 739
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 739 |
My FWW's affair started to slowly fall apart a few weeks after she moved out, and I ONLY saw or talked to her during children exchanges...and VERY briefly. As soon as I was feeling much better about myself, and started "hearing" that things weren't too peachy with them...I carefully chose to start interacting more with her....and that REALLY pissed off OM....and it was soon essentially over with them, and I just "was there" for her to come down softly....
So to answer your question.....it was about 4-6 months from my wife moving out....until I kissed her again....but another month or so before our recovery had truly commenced.
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Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 41
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Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 41 |
BCJ,
I'm not on here often but wanted to let you know like the rest that until there is NO contact( not sight, sound, email, printed word, updates from other co-workers etc.)you are just wasting your time and effort until then.
My wife moved in with OM and when things turned sour she wanted back together. She did try to reconnect with me but after short time sould call OM to see how he was. She then started staying at hes house because he made a suicide attempt. Went back and forth me to him to me... then moved back with him. moved home, then to her own place. We sold our house and I got my own place. I told her if he is in pocture we have no future and I have to move on. After she let that sink in she started to see all his faults and how I must have loved her all along to put up with her head up her ***. She moved home after swearing NC. We decided that if he called or she called she had to tell me the next time she saw me and we would talk about it. I needed to know about contact so I could deal with it then and figure out why it happened. Too long I know.
Fast forward after a bumpy 2 years we are in a better place than we have ever been. Neither one of us takes anything for granted.
My wife moved out 3 times while in contact.
no contact lets fog lift and not the comparing how wonderful he is and how bad you are.
Daniel
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