I should know something very soon. I'll post an update when I do.

Waiting has been hard, but I'm cautiously optimistic.

I have some people who think all will go well. I have others that think it won't.

So we'll have to see.

My support group has been fantastic.

Sally has been a great friend throughout this whole thing. The rest of the group has as well.

I wish I didn't work as far away as I do, but it's a good job.

I'm sorry things didn't work out better with Sally, but I agree that it's good to have her as a friend.

I think I can understand the feeling of, wanting to "like" someone in that way but just not being able to. I imagine she sees you as someone who would be a really good choice, and she tried some casual dating to see if the chemistry might develop, but on her part it didn't. But... I still think it may. I wouldn't keep your hopes up, or wait around. Keeping her as a friend is good though. Maybe she'll even help set you up with someone nice! Or maybe as soon as you start seeing someone, she'll suddenly see you with different eyes.

I think it boils down to her being hurt so badly by WH that it's tough for her to open up to someone else.

I also think that seeing me move on and date may have her see me differently.

Or maybe I just need to lose 30 pounds. Who knows?

So I'll be a friend, keep working on me, and be happy with being single and alone. I'm in no rush to be with anyone right now and my therapist says that's great.

I'm not motivated to rejoin e-harmony or really go out "looking".

I'm in a "cruise" mode right now where if I meet someone, then great. Otherwise, I will just keep living my life.

I feel like things need to settle before I take steps in the dating direction. I'm not closing myself off to it, but I'm not looking for it either.

Sally is someone I'm in regular contact with, which is why I developed an attraction to her. I found her attractive from the start from a physical standpoint. She's exactly my type. Not too thin, brunette, blue eyes and curvy.

I've gotten to know her and really like her company. So I won't hold my breath, but I won't close off the possibility in case she ever feels differently. She still texts me and writes me emails regularly and she knows exactly how I feel.

So we'll see.

POM, I'd be willing to bet there is a wonderful lucky lady somewhere just waiting for a guy like you, even if she doesn't know it yet!

I am still praying for your family's situation.

It's probably for the best that it didn't work out with Sally as you hoped. Friends are more important right now anyway and since you guys are able to be honest about how you feel, she is a good one to have. There's no point in complicating your life further until the dust settles from everything else.

As for those 30 lbs, you've mentioned them at least twice in this thread. Why not do this for yourself? It would be a great goal to work towards and you will be healthier for it!

If it will make you physically healthier, I agree about the 30 lbs. However, don't obssess over it for cosmetic reasons. A lot of ladies would never let 30 lbs get in the way of attraction and affection, and some even prefer the extra padding.

I know of a few I've gone out with that have preferred the extra padding.

Being open with her felt really good. I feel like I can playfully joke with her about things as long as I don't overdo it.

She mentioned that she expected God to just drop the man she's supposed to be with at her doorstep in a UPS box. I joked with her when the conversation continued that if I had any inkling that she felt more for me that I'd dress up as a UPS box and show up at her doorstep, which made her laugh pretty hard.

I just want to clarify that I said she had a WH. It's an exwh. Just to be clear.

The 30 pounds thing is something i've been saying for a while now. I start to make it a reality and something sets me back.

Lately it's been excuses and I have to stop making them.

There's no major pending litigation, so I simply need to do it.

I can start by eating less. Stress leads to comfort eating, which I need to stop. That alone would help a lot.

It helps to know that my shoulder has a real problem that needs to be fixed. I can focus my workouts on running.

I'll do what I call the "Star Trek" workout, which worked great years ago. I put in an episode of ST on the DVD and run until it ends. It's roughly 5 miles of running. Do that 4 times a week and you get in really good shape. It's a nerd workout, but hey, who cares.

I started varying it by adding Quantum Leap and I can always add my current favorite "Battlestar Galactica" to the mix.

I just need to do it.

It feels good to know how she feels and where she stands instead of the mental gymnastics I was going through trying to figure it out.

Definitely take care of that shoulder!

The TV workouts sounds like a great idea!