I have to admit, it's hard not to wonder in this case, given that they felt out of the blue to me and came in at such a weird time--Saturday at midnight after the whole Infidel Gang had a fun trip to Seaworld. Was it the SCQ and POSOM sitting there together trying to figure out how to stick it to SDGuy? Or was she angry about something else?

BR would tell me I only want to know so I can figure out how to control the situation, but there isn't anything I would try to control in this. I'm just interested in who and what I'm dealing with.

"Dear SCQ, the underlying theme in your email was 'I don't like the way you are parenting our children.' I have asked you repeatedly not to send me emails like this. If you don't like the way I handle the lunch bag or dress the kids, maybe you should have thought of that before you turned me into a single dad. Seriously, what did you think would happen? Did you think that I would magically transform into someone who does everything The Way You Think Things Should Be Done? Why on earth would you expect that from me? And can't you recognize how much self-control it takes on my part not to tell you to go [censored] yourself when you criticize me for not doing it The Way You Think It Should Be Done?

There is a lot more to parenting than making lunches. I know--let's play a little game. Let's imagine ten years down the road. Which do you think will be more significant in our childrens' lives--the fact that occasionally there was a ziploc bag of 3-day old carrots in the bottom of their backpack, or the fact that they got to witness you commiting adultery and forcing them to participate?"

Did you really send this to her?

Yowch.

But very good.




Fox

Well, you're exactly right.

What will matter in 6 weeks? What will matter in a year? What will matter in 5 years.

It won't be carrots in their backpack. And, it won't be clothes a tad too short.

I sure as shootin' wouldn't be buying them clothes to send to her house for her to criticize. Let them go home in the clothes she bought. I can't tell you how often clothes from my x's house didn't get home and clothes from my house didn't get home.

I want to see the unedited rough draft!!!

Perhaps tossing in arrogant, autocratic, bossy, despotic, dictatorial, egotistic, imperial, insolent, lordly, overbearing, tyrannical, Nazi, patronizing, grandiose, sniffy, condescendence, huffy, bloated, bombastic, condescending, disdainful, flaunting, hoity-toity, pious, Fascist, preachy, sanctimonious, self-important, smug, strutting, swaggering, and theatrical at various spots in response to her written skit, but other wise on the mark.

Oops. No, I didn't send that. I know better than to send stuff like that, but sometimes I can't help myself from mentally composing them. It helps to vent them out here, so that at least my creative energy isn't totally wasted, and then maybe I can stop mentally composing them and enjoy the day.

That was largely off the top of my head. I think if I put my mind to it, I could be downright vicious. Using only the truth!

SuperDarkGuy can use his powers for good, too. I haven't gotten much in the way of work done today and have been working on my letter to DS8. Here's a passage:

"Soon the divorce will be finalized. I mentioned this to the two of you the other day during a conversation about unpleasant topics. DD5 asked what the word divorce means, and you got angry with me for telling her. You hate the word--you won't even say it, and you wanted to protect your sister from it. I was sincerely touched. Sometimes (frequently?) you mercilessly antagonize your little sister, but in that moment you were everything I could have hoped for from a protective big brother, and I will always love you for that."

Don't hold back now.

On the clothes, they go back and forth so often that it's not really worth worrying about. If it's something I don't want to have go over, I only put the kids in it on days when I know they are coming back. If the kids want to wear something anyway, the SCQ usually knows to send it back over without my having to say anything.

And it's not like they go out dressed like ragamuffins. I've seen plenty of little girls wearing pants that are "too short." It's true that I am a guy and that the difference between Capri pants and pants that are too short is a bit fuzzy for me, but I'll wager that nine out of ten of you would have looked at her and said she looked fine, if not adorable.

I'm not letting any of the criticisms sink in--even the lunch one. I didn't open the lunch bag because DD5 didn't use it either of the days she was with me. I just passed it along. It was absolutely zero trouble for me to dump the stuff out when I got it on Sunday. I wouldn't have even noticed if she hadn't gone to the trouble of pointing it out for me.

She had to reach to hurt me. It's interesting in a clinical sort of way.

Ah so The Sippy Cup Queen strikes again. Frankly, I think the initials should be SCB!! You get to figure out what the B stands for (I am sure you are all more than capable of picking the appropriate word)

What in the Wide World of Sports is that all about? She is SO transparent and pathetic. Although I still really want to get out the golden shovel and the wood chipper for her!!

SD, you are doing well with processing it. Venting here. Seeing it for what it is. Still hurts. Still triggers. And for all of that I am sorry.

I laughed out loud when I read how she left the old lunch stuff for you to clean out! What a hoot!

I'd wager it's a more the fact that you aren't doing the
D process Her Way vs anything to do with clothes, lunches or the price of tea in China. Throw a bit of trouble/reality in paradise and you have one pi$$ed off SCB!! Ah, the drama!

Those commas ARE important. Getting the address spelled correctly IS important. Yet, like the rest of this, she is focused on getting what she wants, when she wants it, the way she wants it. Life don't work like that and it's high time that she be reminded of that fact.

Hang in there buddy. YOU are doing so well.

MY heart melted and my eyes teared up with the turn around "I love you Daddy" comment, too. THAT is what is important. Count those blessings!!

Yup, I think you are doing a good job....and that she deserves that B. But, going there won't help you heal.

I was just warming up Lil!

I think the SCQ struggles terribly with her choices at times and when she does she goes off on some sippy cup stem cleaning, laundry detergent rash ranting, carrot bag tirade to help herself believe she still is a good mother. But inside, she knows she is not a good mother.



She’s already playing this game and does not like the score.



That hit the SCQ like a ton of bricks. Does she get these kind of spontaneous from the heart sincere, “I love you Moms?” And a day later she’s on a rant? Coincidence? Not.

Thanks, Amigo. I think you're right about this.

I'm leaning more and more towards no response, but I think I will gently probe DS8 tonight to see if anything unusual happened Saturday night.

Laundry detergent. You've got a good memory--I was trying to remember what the other rants were and couldn't come up with that one. In the end, it was dryer sheets. The store was out of Bounce-Free for a while.

How about this for a reply:

"Do you feel like a good mom now?"

You once had a chocolate milk issue to resolve too. You are truly incompetent.

It's a wonder my kids are even still alive.

I can only imagine what will happen whe Child Services gets the scoop on Carrot-Gate.

Oh come on this isnt fair!!!!

Some of us were otherwise occupied 100+ pages ago, share please????????????????????????????????????????????

and the other stuff, I only have heard of the sippy cup incident

The Origin of the Sippy Cup Queen (See Post 1782454 3/26/07 10:49 PM)

Thanks for that chrisner.

SDGuy, that link started me reading at around feb 2007, I only started reading your thread regulary about June 2008. You WW hasnt changed at all that I could see. She still has very angry emails, goes nuclear for no apparent reason, and makes mountains out of molehills.
Was she always like that?
I did like one quote way back there that someone said..


BTW did the OM every get his D?