WW texted me tonight just to tell me that she still means every word of what she said last night.

She also tried to tell me when D7 called her that they just talked at his house for a couple hours Friday morning. yeah right.

Rusty,
Have they been having sex at work or taking time away from their jobs to carry on their affair? I ask this because it sounds like they may work at a nursing home or some type of facility that has Health department oversight. You could consider filing a complaint with one of the agencies that provides licensure to the facility. This type of information about licensure is normally posted in plain view and information about how to file complaints is usually also posted in plain view. Take a look around the place and see what you find in this regard. If you do not use this avenue right now, you need to get detail of it for possible future use.

Since the exposure isn't doing that much, maybe you need to look at a different tactic.

I would definitely contact that HR person you talked to and ask them why they have not been disciplined yet. I would do it in writing, and CC, on the letter, the owner or CEO of the company - that way, HR knows that the owner knows and HR can no longer hide the event. Let them know in the letter that you are consulting with your attorney on whether their company will be liable for allowing the affair to continue at their workplace.

I don't remember what you said about the rest of OM's family. Have you found them and contacted them? What about WW's friends?

And since she has mentioned moving in with drug dealer, I would spend the money to visit a lawyer and have him do some initial work toward protecting your parental rights in the light of an affair; let your wife know if she keeps making bad judgments like these, you will move toward protecting your kids. Only NC will make you stop.

They were at his house? Rusty, call this woman TODAY and tell her that your wife was in her house on Friday morning with her husband. Rusty.. Rusty... I don't care what this woman says, you have to get through to her.

Rusty, the exposure at work needs to be EXECUTED by the HR director. This is silly not to do anything in order to protect your name. THAT DEFEATS THE PURPOSE. This needs to BLOW UP at work. Do what you have to do to make that happen. Call the woman back and tell her the affair is still going on and ask her to do something about it.

Keeping the exposure SECRET defeats the purpose. It makes your exposure meaningless.

Hang in there - her affair is super doomed to fail.

this is a good one - all about your WW's thinking

He has groped her and stuff in patients rooms. She told me about it back when she was still talking to me a lot more than she is now. I am collecting information for regulatory agencies that oversee their type of work and seeing what I can do. May even be able to have their personal licenses revoked.



All of these things are already on my to-do list pretty quick.



I told her they met for sex at her house. She just wants me to leave her alone. When I first talked to her, she found out through the love letter I gave her that they have sex in her house. She was mad and all but she refuses my help.

The facility administrator said she was going to get her ducks in a row and do something. If it takes her too long I am going to call back and/or send another letter.

What a creepy place your wife works in! Sexual groping in patient's rooms, drug addict caregivers. I think I would file a complaint with JCAHO and the state.

Wow, that was awesome. He is in his second marriage. OMW told me they have to be hard to find(if you have read everything you would see how hard it was for me to find out anything about them)because his ex wife is so crazy. So this is actually his second marriage and his first W was just "crazy". Guess he didnt make her that way. lol.


I can hang in there for quite a while. I get negative sometimes but as you know it's a rollercoaster ride. We all know that WS eventually want to come back. Every one I have ever known wants to come back eventually. My dad is now growing old alone because of the way he was. He was a WS 3 times(that he actually left for, was probably MANY more) and the last time my mom said no more.

Thanks guys

Good job, Rusty!

And sadly, it is an upscale Christian organization.

Does a propper plan A pi$$ off the wayward? I think I was starting to do it right tonight and it kinda made her mad.

Yes sir - WW has made you out to be a three-headed-ogre
and when you refuse to play that part her "reasons" for not loving you start to look pale & weak - hence the pissy mood

OK. I was happy, go lucky today and she mocked me a few times when I laughed with the kids and all.

Then I informed her that New Years was her night with the kids and that I could no longer watch them for her since she lied to me Friday morning saying she was going xmas shopping and instead going to OM house. I watched the kids for her that morning and she lied about where she went. I am also no longer watching them on nights that should be hers so she can work overtime.

D7 cried and didnt want me to leave tonight, but I told her that I had to and that this was not the road I had chosen and I would rather be with her every night. All within earshot of WW. Then told WW that I knew she had gotten OM a prepaid cell phone for x mas and she went off. Wow, she gets really upset that I seem to know almost everythign she does.

Any of this over the line or right on track?

Of course. Your excellent plan A is not enabling her to say "rusty is being mean to me" so she can't find any justifications as to how "bad" you are.

You're doing it right.

Amazing how easy it becomes to keep your emotions in check when you keep your eye on the prize. I am hoping I can keep going for a year before I am burned out, though. Hope plan A and B can keep me in check at least that long.

Knowing how OM is, though, she should be out of the A in 6 months. He's not going to leave his W for her and all that. Hopefully they just lose their jobs pretty quick since we live nowhere near them and she can start withdrawal.

She will want to come back one day, she just better hope it is before it is too late for her.

In a little while (not yet) you would be smart to (gently and softly) tell her - "I still want to be married to you - however - if you think I will wait in limbo forever - you are mistaken." Then, smile, and offer to make her a cup of tea or give her a foot rub.

Keep her off balance as much as possible.

A critical part of Plan A! Keep it up!

I have a couple of times this past week, whenever she would say something about it. Her "official" plan is to live seperately for a year from D-day. If I pi$$ her off too much she will move the date back. I asked her what if she felt like coming back earlier and she said if that happened then it happened. So I asked WTH was the point of a timeline anyways then? Deep down she knows that her days with OM are numbered. I think this is why she has done some of these things. Of course, she's special. lol



ETA: Oh yeah, she told me earlier that she could not trust me because I told OMW about her going to their house friday morning. I told her thursday night that if he called her or anythign any more I would tell OMW. I asked her how she could be mad at me when I have been truthful and even told her I would call OMW if they had contact. She just got huffy and went into the other room.

Maybe you should offer her a potato chip?

LOL. I love throwing her curves like that.

She was sick today and didnt have the gas money to come and get the kids, so I took them over to her and bought the kids dinner. I was helping her out since she was sick around the house a little until she started acting like she wasnt so sick any more so I left. Wow, she is a txting machine. She broke 3k txts today for the month and its only the 22nd.

Maybe I should send OM a txt or two from online to make it look like it is from her phone just to mess with them.