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I almost let the Seinfeld thing get by me.
BH-me 32
WW-27
Married 5 yrs. together for 8
D2
D7
D-Day:11/10
EA for a week went PA and WW immediately left home leaving everything behind.
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Doing a plan A is not being a doormat.
Being one of the many BH's that come here and refuse to follow advice and take action such as exposure are the doormats.
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I have followed advice and exposed.
BH-me 32
WW-27
Married 5 yrs. together for 8
D2
D7
D-Day:11/10
EA for a week went PA and WW immediately left home leaving everything behind.
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,959
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Rusty, you've got moxie!
Give those kids all the love they deserve! Your WW has no idea how much she may lose on one very ill-conceived decision.
Stay positive!
BH - me 53, ONS 1979
FWW - 51, 2 EA's, 1 PA
Last D-Day, Sep. 30, 2003
Last Contact/recovery began 2-26-04
***You can do anything with time and money...but remember...money won't buy you time!***
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 546
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BH-me 32
WW-27
Married 5 yrs. together for 8
D2
D7
D-Day:11/10
EA for a week went PA and WW immediately left home leaving everything behind.
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 546
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In the "circle" of people at wok that knew about the adultery was WW, OM and WW friend. WW found out that "friend" had told a couple of people about it. This morning WW went to the office, denied whatever they were going to hear and then proceded to try to get her friend fired. What will they do? lol
BH-me 32
WW-27
Married 5 yrs. together for 8
D2
D7
D-Day:11/10
EA for a week went PA and WW immediately left home leaving everything behind.
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,959
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Exposure and friends with loose lips make the affair world get smaller and more uncomfortable with each passing day.
I have a feeling your WW's fantasy world is about to fall apart!
BH - me 53, ONS 1979
FWW - 51, 2 EA's, 1 PA
Last D-Day, Sep. 30, 2003
Last Contact/recovery began 2-26-04
***You can do anything with time and money...but remember...money won't buy you time!***
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 546
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Sounds good to me SD.
Just so you all know, unless I ask about something...like if he tried to contact WW she is not allowed to mention ANYTHING about him in front of me. At ALL. She tried to tell a story yesterday that he was just involved in a few weks before and I told her that I wouldnt stand for it.
BH-me 32
WW-27
Married 5 yrs. together for 8
D2
D7
D-Day:11/10
EA for a week went PA and WW immediately left home leaving everything behind.
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,959
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And if she stands by that boundary, then she is showing you some respect. That's a step forward. Bask a moment in the progress, keeping one eye open for the unexpected!
BH - me 53, ONS 1979
FWW - 51, 2 EA's, 1 PA
Last D-Day, Sep. 30, 2003
Last Contact/recovery began 2-26-04
***You can do anything with time and money...but remember...money won't buy you time!***
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,959
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RS
How are you holding up over the holidays?
Any change due to the latest exposure?
Any signs of softening from your WW?
We'd love an update if you have the time and/or anything to report...thanks!
BH - me 53, ONS 1979
FWW - 51, 2 EA's, 1 PA
Last D-Day, Sep. 30, 2003
Last Contact/recovery began 2-26-04
***You can do anything with time and money...but remember...money won't buy you time!***
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 546
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Not really anything much going on right now. Been really studying mortarman's stuff and reading books. Working on me and showing myself off to her when I have the opportunity.
BH-me 32
WW-27
Married 5 yrs. together for 8
D2
D7
D-Day:11/10
EA for a week went PA and WW immediately left home leaving everything behind.
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
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Not really anything much going on right now. Been really studying mortarman's stuff and reading books. Working on me and showing myself off to her when I have the opportunity. This will pay you dividends - no matter what happens to your marriage. 
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Yep.
D7 birthday is Sunday so I have got stuff to do there(technically she's 6 until Sunday but who's counting).
She told my mom the other night that she would really like a party at school and it to be a surprise so we got things squared away to have her something Monday at school too. She will be so excited.
BH-me 32
WW-27
Married 5 yrs. together for 8
D2
D7
D-Day:11/10
EA for a week went PA and WW immediately left home leaving everything behind.
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Posts: 546
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WW called me this morning on her way home from work. She small talked a little bit and when I asked her about work she just started talking and wouldnt quit. Her rel friend she has at work was sitting outside last night when OM and a friend came outside. He didnt notice her and was bragging to his friend about how many girls he had on the side. WW friend went in and told her about it and that crushed WW because he had been telling her she's the only one(besides his wife), she's special, you know the lines POSOM uses. lol
Then for the first time WW started talking about the wrong decisions she has made with him and stuff. Maybe the worm has finally started to turn and she will fully realize what she has done.
BH-me 32
WW-27
Married 5 yrs. together for 8
D2
D7
D-Day:11/10
EA for a week went PA and WW immediately left home leaving everything behind.
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
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It's a rude awakening for the married WW when she realizes she is a piece of ash.
When WW *t h o u g h t* she and OM were soulmates - she discovers she's his solemeat.
Be the lighthouse.
Last edited by Pepperband; 01/04/09 12:27 PM. Reason: spelling nazi
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She is trying to tell me she isnt hurt by it...but I know. I seen the love letter she wrote to him when I found it after the dog strowed her purse.
She told me that she knew inside but pushed that away because she wanted so desperately to believe him.
As for the lighthouse, I just hope I dont attract women from Venus because I am shining so bright. lol
What does happen, though is she always seems to turn to me when she is hurting. Makes it kind of hard on me to southe her hurting when I have my own but that is what I do.
BH-me 32
WW-27
Married 5 yrs. together for 8
D2
D7
D-Day:11/10
EA for a week went PA and WW immediately left home leaving everything behind.
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
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What does happen, though is she always seems to turn to me when she is hurting. Makes it kind of hard on me to southe her hurting when I have my own but that is what I do. Have you ever wondered if WW feels you don't (deep down) NEED her? Have you ever wondered if asking WW to soothe your hurts would emotionally draw her closer to you?
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Hold it - I wanted to make something more clear.
You DESIRE your wife (as opposed to "need"). Does she know that?
You welcome and desire her warmth and care when you are in pain. Does she know that?
Have you asked her to comfort you when you are in pain?
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I think it is actually tho other way around. I think she needs me more than she thinks I need her. I dont *need* her, if she left forever tomorrow then I would be hurt but my heart would continue to beat...I would still live. She does need somebody, though. She has spent her life trying to fill holes in her soul that are empty. I cannot fill those holes for her permaently, I can only plug them up until I help her to heal them herself.
But anyways...
ETA: you beat me to it.
Last edited by rustyshackelford; 01/04/09 12:37 PM.
BH-me 32
WW-27
Married 5 yrs. together for 8
D2
D7
D-Day:11/10
EA for a week went PA and WW immediately left home leaving everything behind.
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
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Posts: 35,996 |
She does need somebody, though. She has spent her life trying to fill holes in her soul that are empty. I cannot fill those holes for her permaently, I can only plug them up until I help her to heal them herself. totally agree
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