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JosephH,

The horse world is FILLED with these type of people. In fact, your sitch is the third in the last few months on these forums where the OP is a "horse" trainer. They seduce people to help support their habits.

As you probably know, horses can be an addiction unto themselves. People develop deep, deep emotional bonds with the horses and the resulting boundaries are very, very shallow and weak. You may be asking yourself how did this happen?

Well, the OM has more than likely played this game before. Your WW was having difficulty with her horse. The OM came along and worked his "magic" with the animal. Soon enough, the OM and WW started getting into "deep" conversations and before you know it, they declared themselves soulmates. I know, the OM did it to my WW. He helped her out with a difficult horse then started playing the angle that I could never help her with the horses the way he helps her etc etc etc.

If you do some digging, the OM probably has done this to other people.

You need to expose to family and your children. If family members know they can put the pressure on WW and perhaps keep a look out while you are gone on your upcoming trips. The worse thing you could do is cover for WW. Expose and do not warn her.