Wow, Chai! I'm sorry to hear you are having to go through so much stress and pain!!



Yeah, that was pretty stupid of the rehab. I can't believe they fell for it!! You would think they have all the tricks addicts use figured out by now!!

My friend who has a situation similar to yours minus the WS and a pregnancy--(so far, Thank, GOD! Knock on wood!!)...well, her son called the cops on her daughter, who had a warrant out for her arrest for breaking her probation. This was before Christmas.

So, my friend was ticked at her son for that and made up some excuse as to why he did it instead of the real reason because she didn't want to hear it: he is tired of his sister abusing his mother.

At first my friend said she was going to let her stay in jail but then she kept worrying about Christmas and a trip to the dentist, etc. She held out for a while but then she busted her out of jail after Christmas.

In the interim, though, when she was still in jail, her half-sister ran off to Florida with her ex-con boyfriend. They were going to get an apartment together, etc. but something happened, so half-sister came back. So when my friend's daughter heard about that she flew off the handle and had a fight with her sister.

Well, now the girl is missing and of course...she is with the ex-con. He came back to Texas from Florida. She stole some money from her LITTLE brother and took off in the car my friend foolishly purchased for her after she wrecked hers due to her drug induced lifestyle.

I don't know. My friend is still in her own fog about this. I printed some stuff out for her on enabling and she read it and it seemed to get through to her somewhat. She said she was going to read it again so I'm hoping she finally has a breakthrough, especially in light of her daughter's taking a powder.

Really, she should call that car in as stolen but I don't know if she will. I don't know what it's going to take for her to finally stop enabling that rancid child!!

Well, sorry to ramble on but dang!! You couldn't write this as fiction and have anyone believe it!! Maybe we should try, though, you and I co-author a book on addicts. We can throw my cousin's story in there, too. She is doing FANTASTIC now!!! She even patched up her relationship with one of her daughters since she kicked her lifelong friend, Booze, to the curb and she's getting to know the granddaughter she never really knew.

Yeah, but okay, this will have to be AFTER Shiny's book is published. LMAO!!!!!

Charlotte

:twobyfour: that's for the rehab place

:twobyfour: :twobyfour: :twobyfour: that's for Chai's daughter


:twobyfour: :twobyfour: :twobyfour: that's for Chai's husband


that's for Chai

ITA!! I second that emotion!!!!

Well, he entered the world this morning slightly after 9am. She went to the hospital at 4am. I was so disgusted yesterday that I turned off my phone last night, so I didn't get the message until 10am (ok, I slept late). It was unfortunate that she had to go through it alone, but her behavior pushes everyone away.

Anyway, I picked up the BF from rehab, picked up his mom, and we all went over. The baby was in the special nursery and DD told us it was because he was small (5lbs) and his breathing was fast. I wasn't sure I believed it. I expected him to be born addicted, so we all wondered if that was the case. The staff would not tell us anything as they would only talk to the mother.

As it turns out, I think she was telling the truth. We all went into the nursery and held him. He was very calm, and slept most of the time. They had a hard time getting him to stay awake and eat. My nurse friend told me that if he was born addicted he would not have been calm at all.

The BF's mother asked DD how she liked the rehab, and I overheard her say that it was a good thing but she didn't want to tell me that. She also told us that she "might as well" stay for the entire 6-9 months. That was positive.

So we'll see how it goes. She's either going to turn it around or she isn't. I know that the staff there will protect the baby at all costs, and if DD screws up, CPS will be called immediately. They have already warned her of that. One of the girls that she met there told her that too - they don't [censored] around with you. They'll take the baby if they have to.

BF's mother also asked her if her dad was coming to see the baby, and DD pointed to me and said "not as long as she is anywhere close." The venom never ceases to amaze me. BF's mother asked me why he was so hostile. How do you explain waywardness?

Char, we do need to write that book. I bought the book "My Beautiful Boy" which was about a dad and his addicted son. Not to downplay it, but that dad got off easy. Some of my stories would have even him appalled.

Well, I just got an apology from DD. She called to apologize for the verbal abuse and said that she thinks the rehab will be good for her.

I'm still in shock....

Mazel Tov on the birth of your grandson. How was it for you? Who does he look like? His weight shouldn't be a problem.

G-d works his miracles in his time, not ours....

Congratulations, Chai! For a lot of different things.

Chai,

Congratulations!!

So, are you Grandma? GG? Mimi? G-ma? What's it going to be?

To steal a quote from Steel Magnolias, "Let's just focus on the JOY of the situation!"

The rest is best taken one day at a time.

However, I think this


Is a GREAT sign! Maybe you got just a tiny glimpse of your DD! YEAH!

Think back to when your DD was born. Becoming a Mother changes a woman. This will change your DD, too! Looking at her son, she 'may' just become aware/acknowledge a bit of what you are feeling/thinking when it comes to HER. AND, having someone ELSE to care for/think about besides herself may be just the ticket.

Congrats!!!

Thanks all!! As we've said, I can only take one day at a time on this.

DD, who never says anything much against her dad, said that dad stopped by and he was in "rare form" last night. She has never said anything like that before. I asked what she meant, and she said he was REALLY out of it. Like he was on drugs. And who would know that better than her? It would be hard to believe, but then he is not the same person. Like most waywards, they transform into something you don't know anymore.

Baby won't eat, so they may have to insert a feeding tube. He just wants to sleep. DD thinks this is how it will be forever. She sure has a rude awakening coming her way.

You can say that again.

Like most waywards, they transform into somehthing you don't know anymore.

reminds me of this cheer I once learned...

rah, rah, ree
kick 'em in the knee
rah, rah, rass
kick 'em in the other knee

Boy she is well prepared for motherhood. LOL...

When my daughter got pregnant and subsequently lost the baby, the things she said she would miss about it, I just shook my head and wanted to say to her honey.... it's not the the doll I bought you when you were 5.

Hey Chai, did DD get drugs that day? If not, isn't it interesting that she notices WH is in rare form when she is possible straight.

How's the baby doing today?

Just got caught up on your thread, CL.

Congratulations!


I am not surprised, CL....just that it came this early.

If you are too close to see it now, I hope one day you can realize that what you have done for your DD and grandson is.....AWESOME!

I pray with all my heart for your DD, by becoming a mom and being forced to stay at the rehab, that she will see the golden opportunity she has been given to turn her life around...and TAKES IT.

...and now, please take care of CL... she has gone through a lot.

You can say that again.

and now, please take care of CL... she has gone through a lot.

Hey guys,

Thanks for checking in. Drama continues.

I had proof today that DD has been clean for 5 mos. except for the methadone prescription. The ob Dr. told me today that he couldn't take her off it while pregnant or the baby would have suffered. He said that now, she can get off of the stuff. I then took her to the pain mgt. MD who is prescribing it and he is going to cut her down 30% per month. Whether she will stay clean is up to her.

The other grandparents are threatening to have the baby taken after they found out about the continuing prescription. They have been calling the hospital, CPS etc. The baby has to stay at the hospital a little longer because he still isn't eating, and the BF and his parents are blaming it on the methadone use. The BF is also threatening her, which is a hoot because he is 26, never had a job, and is in rehab now to keep himself out of prison. Like he would get the baby. Duh.

So, it's a big ol' mess. On top of that, the rehab says they won't take her back unless she is totally off the prescription, but the doctor says he can't just take her off cold turkey. So, the PO is trying to find another alternative. She could be going to jail for 30 days, in which case I suppose I will take the baby while she is there.

Of course WH has been calling and threatening this and that. I hear DD's convos with him and I can pretty much figure out what he is saying. He says I'm making a mess of this but I don't see him here helping. Oh, and DD commented that he said I gave him the heart attack. Yeah, and I also caused the economic downturn. Wayward, wayward, wayward. He's just pi$$ed because his little OP dropped him. DD did mention that he drinks a lot and is smoking a lot.

I've come to realize that he really does hate me. It's OK though because it doesn't bother me all that much. He has totally blamed this on me, but deep down I know that he knows the truth. I don't say anything at all. I just keep to my Plan B. Thank the Harleys for Plan B because it actually has kept me from jumping in the gutter with him.

I have no idea where all of this will end up. I'm ready for an end to this mess. It's a given that this little guy is never going to have a normal family life, and for that I'm very sad. I want him to grow up with two parents, but it isn't going to happen.

This stinks really big time. I wish I could do something to make it better...say something....

That baby needs two healthy parents to love it.

To know you are going through this breaks my heart.


CHAI