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t/j hey Mel, how did you stick that smiley in there? Mine never come out right. 
BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011
Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.
We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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I'm glad to hear you have requirements. That's good, because it's a plan!
If you don't require him to change #'s and email, you can always install a keylogger and the spying software on his cell. Just a thought.
Trust but verify.
I still check things every once in awhile, and we're 2 years out from DD and 3 years out from the ONS.
As for counseling, when I was looking for a counselor, the first thing I asked them was "Are you Pro-marriage?" I let them know right away that I was working to save my marriage, and I didn't want to hear one thing about D, that wasn't my goal, and it wasn't to be discussed. Again, just a thought.
Me BS
H FWS
DDay 10/2007
Actively recovering, learning, loving, earning a better marriage!
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"Got an email from OW this morning telling ME that I hard hurt HER again."
Did you say: How did I hurt you? You were the one that cheated on your own husband. I did not force or coerce you to be unfaithful to your husband. Why are you holding me responsible for your actions?
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Funny Mel! Needed a chuckle!
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Here is some more Plan A info that really helped me so maybe you can get some mileage out of it too. Here's another little tip I came across form three different sources: engage your husband in conversation as early each day as practical. The FIRST person somebody discusses things with is the person they bond the closest to. It doesn't even matter what the topic is: the weather, the news, the children, soem tv show, whatever. Typically males don't talk as much as females so they might talk about something only ONCE so it's very important to try to take advantage of being the first (and perhaps only) person they talk to. So calling him before he goes to work each day is a good idea. Just remember to keep it lighthearted and chatty. One of the reasons so many WS's get involved with coworkers is because of this concept. They start out simply chatting about mundane harmless stuff, then joking around and being 'friends', then oops - one thing has led to another.
OK, one more tip: I've read that only 1 in 5 conversations should be about the relationship, problems, or anything negative. Talk about it if he brings it up and isn't trying to bait you into an argument. Did you make yourself a little list to keep yourself on track?
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WH came by to get mail. he is very down and depressed. (haha) Asked that I make him something for lunch, which I did. Kept everything light. Did crossword puzzle together just like we have been for the last months.
Told him he looked tired. He said he feels like he's 100 years old today ( another haha). Suggested he lie down on the couch and take a rest.
Kept a smile on my face the whole time
No sign that OW has contacted him about me calling her husband.
BTW - She also told me that I must not have understood about the fragile state of her marriage. Should have said, 'ya, because you had an affair.'
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BTW - She also told me that I must not have understood about the fragile state of her marriage. pfftt...break out the violin. 
BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011
Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.
We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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WH just left, still dwon and depressed. Is it wrong that I get a little satisfaction out of seeing him this way?
A little worried about the fragile state of marriage comment. I wonder if she will call WH and cry on his shoulder. Or worse yet, tell him I pushed them to a divorce? That would be all it would take for him to go running to her and leave his family
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WH came by to get mail. he is very down and depressed......
Told him he looked tired. He said he feels like he's 100 years old today ( another haha). Suggested he lie down on the couch and take a rest. Sounds like since you and OWH are interfering in the affair, it is starting to take some of the fun/fantasy out of it. You are doing great. Just stay on track with your Plan A. Are you able to monitor if OW and WH are talking? (text records, etc?)
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Just got an email from OW stating that WH had tried to call her, but she didn't pick up the phone. told me she had no intention of talking to him. Asked me to forward email to WH
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BTW - She also told me that I must not have understood about the fragile state of her marriage. Should have said, 'ya, because you had an affair.' claygal, forward all her emails to her H and cc her on them. Just tell him "your wife continues to email me this garbage and I thought you should know."
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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It's all blowing up. She told WH her marriage was over because of what I did.
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It's all blowing up. She told WH her marriage was over because of what I did. Good! Now the affair will die faster! What did your WH say?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Are you forwarding her emails to her H? I would do that along with telling him what that skank is telling your WH.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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It's all blowing up. She told WH her marriage was over because of what I did. It's not blowing up. She's scrabbling to try to get a reaction so that SHE won't be the one being blamed. Remain still!
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claygal, you have the affair on the ROPES, don't back down now. Keep the OWH informed of every communication from the OW so he knows what she is saying.
And don't let them blame YOU for their troubles, that is bullcrap. You are not to blame for her choice to have an affair with her H. She is 100% responsible for that choice. So, don't let them tell you otherwise.
And don't worry about them breaking up - which they won't. If that happens it is because of her affair. If they did split up, that means the OW would have to get off her [censored] and support herself and come up with money for a separation, etc.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Keep your wits about you. OPs are liars and start getting desperate to hang on to the AP. Unless she can magically get a D tomorrow her M is not over.
BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011
Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.
We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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She is a scheming little witch who is trying to play them all.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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I didn't forward emails. Don't have his email address, and I deleted them. I didn't want WH to get his eyes on them, although I guess there wasn't anything in there he couldn't see, just some things that she through back in my face about what I had said about WH (lying, pot smoking, bandruptcy)
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claygal, the infidels are having a meltdown. Just pull up a chair and enjoy the show!! 
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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