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Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 78
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Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 78 |
Very willing.. He has been trying to text them to meet face to face so he can apologize to them for hurting them and me.. They will not acknowledge..
We both also agreed to complete a post nup agreement as outlined by ME... He will be meeting with his family and let them know of the lies of why we were divorcing. He will let them know the truth of what he did, how he hurt us all.
Just as an aside, he has not asked to move back in because he wants to show me that he is NOT doing this because of finances.
I just was to make sure I do this right THIS time.. I don't want to ever see another D-Day.. and I know there are no promises, but I do know that we have gone through so much, that he has been my true best friend (except during the A of course) and that I couldn't imagine spending the rest of my life with someone other than him..
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Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 3,146
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Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 3,146 |
His relationships that HE damaged will be up to him to repair. The best thing you can do is stay out of the way and DO NOT try to repair them for him. He needs to clean this up or it will have no permanent impact on him.
My daughter then almost 14 yrs old, was furious that my wife reconciled with me, she was angry with both of us!
It took close to a full year before my daughter began to give me any grace again. It has now been 2 years and she recently told a friend how she loves being so close to her mom and her dad. I have worked very hard to restore this relationship with her and I am now after 2 years seeing the fruit of my efforts.
Recovery began 10/07;
Meeting my wife's EN's is my "thank you" that refuses to be silenced.
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 1,549
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 1,549 |
tst is right. Actions speak.
Don't do any heavy lifting for your H.
My H apologized to my dad about 2 years post DDay, too, if that helps. They get along fine now.
Me:BW, FWH 1DD 1DS
Status: Chronicled in Dr. Suess's "The Zax"
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 11,245
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 11,245 |
> how long til I let him back in our home?? Speaking for myself, it would not happen until he had made up with the DDs. Until THEY forgave HIM. Sooner than that just proves to them that life is all about making OTHER people happy, and they are just pawns. But that's just me.  Besides, if you take the next year to go through awesome therapy, awesome time together, hard work on building an honest relationship...it would take a good year for the new habits to form.
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