I'm having t-shirts made with this on the front and "I {heart} MelodyLane" on the back.

Any takers?

Hi Catperson,

You do make me laugh. I like your amendments to my message.

However, I don't really want to lie and WS hasn't said that he knows he is making destructive choices, so I will leave that bit out but keep in "because of his addictive personality".
And the very last bit I may amend to "...sex with a married person when they know it will hurt their children?", because we don't have any ourselves.

Thank you - any more suggestions?

I have one idea, change the first sentence to "the OW asked me to contact you". This is true, no?

OW wrote "Im not scared for you to contact anyone else.....Go right ahead."

So maybe I could put "OW invited me to contact you" or "OW encouraged me to contact you"

????

encouraged

Thanks - will do

Tempting to create a FB fan page: "OW is a jacka$$"

Hi TM,

How about this as a possible amendment to cat's P.S.?

P.S. To those of you who have expressed that it is ME who should be ashamed of letting the world know the TRUTH, perhaps you should make a note that, it is wrong to COMMIT adultery, it is NOT wrong to EXPOSE adultery.

This next bit [pardon the pun], I wish you could send to the HO, regarding this particular quote of hers:


No, I suppose you are right, I don't. I wasn't even aware they made "social tack", in fact. Tell me, is that the gear that my husband has you wear when he takes you public places? Do you always wear the full regalia then? The saddle, stirrups, bridle, halter, reins, bits, harness, martingale, and breastplate? Wow, that sounds like a lot of work! Forgive me if that is not a socially TACTful thing to ask. I am usually quite good with social graces, but gee, who knew there was such a thing as "social tack" for horses!?!?! I do thank you for the opportunity to learn.

Mrs. W

Thanks, Mrs W - I was wondering what "social tack" is. Now I know. One day, when this is all over, I will send her the link to this page so she can find out what honourable, sane people think of her behaviour. (And her letter writing skills).

And yes, I like your adjustment to the PS. Thank you

TM

Mrs. Wondering's joke reminded me that your OW sounds very young and immature. Is she as old as you guys? She writes like my 12-year-old. (Actually, that's being mean to my daughter.)
Seriously, though.
A Facebook exposure is important, but it's not enough. Many of the most important people in my life are not on FB. You need email or a phone book.
Also, when the skank says her mom just got out of surgery and her dad has alzheimers, and they can't take the stress, you say:
"First of all, it was not ME who caused the stress. YOU have made a poor choice and I'm going back to your parents because it's clear that they left out the lesson on general morality. I'm hoping that by contacting them now, even at this late stage in your upbringing, they can double back and teach you the difference between right and wrong."
"Secondly, if they're so ill, it's interesting that you are still able to have a family dinner with them."
"Thirdly, I hope you're not teaching your OWN child that this is the right way to go about finding a mate (stealing someone elses's). Perhaps he/she needs a little lesson as well?"
That ought to drive her into a BLIND RAGE.

Hey TM

been reading all the replies you have regarding facebook exposure, a couple of things you need to bear in mind

1) you can only email a certain amount of people at any one time, i dont remember how many people i got to email from her frieds list before facebook blocked my email, this is nothing to do with the content of the email but its done by facebook to stop spamming.
So be prepared for that, what i did is created 3 accounts with facebook and this allowed me to email all 150 of her friends.

2) Make the title of the email appealing, im emailing so the receiver opens it something like the OW name and thats it.

3) Email fast as you dont want her to get to her friends first and stop them from reading your email.

4) Just for fun i copied adn pasted her friends lists onto word processor to keep it for my own record should she decide to make her facebook profile private half way through your emailing. This was fun because as her frieds started deleting her from their lists her friends numbers started dropping, now she has gone from approximately 150 friends to barely 60. people dont want the hassle of being linked to a skank.

5) when you start getting replyes from her friends make sure you reply nicely to them, I got so much slack from some of them but because i was nice to them even if they slammed me this made them rethink and some of them even dished some dirt on OW.

I do think you exposure email is ok however you need to really think about what you want to achieve from it, if your only contacting people to get her parents address then its fine but if you want to get these people to feel sorry for you and give her hell/expose her then it needs to be more specific to that purpose.

Maybe think about writing the email along the lines of "my point of view" as those who are aware of what is going on with OW and your WS will have heard all kinds of stories about you and you have not yet had the chance to stick up for yourself (ie like OW states that you treated WS family badly etc).
Good luck

Hi imanotherone and brutallyhonest

The OW is 1 year younger than me and looks about 10 years older.

Yes, I did think of the contradiction of her parents being ill and then having dinner with them. The important people in her life are her son, my WS and her parents. I'm not going to involve her son - he is 14.

I would love to send a reply along the lines of what people have suggested, but I am not going to.

I'm not really contacting people now to get to the parents because I am certain that I e-mailed her mum in my first round. They may even have been sitting at the dinner table when my e-mail came through!
I suppose I just hope to get to some people with morals who might have words with her or make her social life a little difficult. I believe that a large part of my WS attraction to OW is the friends that she has. Although, he is mostly interested in the drinking, easy people and they will probably stick around for the free booze anyway.

I don't want to make my e-mail too long that people won't read it. I think the main issue that WS and OW are facing is that they have told everyone that WS is separated, which implies that WS wife has agreed to the current situation. My message is clearly making the point that I am not ok with it and that they both know this. In my book, that puts a different spin on things.

Even my sister says that I should accept it is over because we are "separated" but I think that separation means one of two things, both parties in agreement. Either a) the couple are living apart to stop arguements and dating to see if they can get back together or b) the couple have agreed it is over and are on the road to divorce. Neither scenario applies to us because WS has not asked for a divorce or instigated proceedings.

What does everyone else think that separation means? Have I got it totally wrong?

Thanks,

TM

Hmmm. The son is 14......
My guess is most folks on here will say that's old enough to know his mamma's a hoe. Does he have a facebook?
You think I'm kidding. Do you want to protect the son of a skank or do you want to save your 22 yr relationship? You've been with WH eight years longer than he's ever been alive. His mamma's obviously not showing him the dfference between right and wrong...

Hey TM Just a quick thought maybe you should make a special effort to mention that WS has not started D proceedings, as OW will probably peressure him into it making WS argue with her etc, this will then in turn make her insecure (why isnt he divorcing his wife? does he really care about me? etc). IF she then starts ngging your WS about this issue it will only drive him away.
As far as her son goes hold off on that exposure until after Facebook exposure as it may seem vindictive to OW friends and you really need to get their sympathy vote if their going to support your marriage.

OK this next bit is hard but I got to do it, I was scared of the wrath of MB members if i had suggested sending the following email to OW friends but at the end of the day its just my opinion so hopefully i will aviod total innaliation.

I would send follwing email

Hi im contacting you because you are friends with ...... on facebook and therefore i assume you know her, I wanted to let you know that she is currently sleeping with my husband and is revelling in making my life a misery, she has contacted me to encourage me to email her friends as you seem to all know about A, I have taken her up on her offer because i feel that my side of the story has not been able to be expressed regarding this situation and therefore my WS and OW have been able to get away with your acceptance of this horrid situation.
(talk about your marriage and your relationship with husband explain before A how you found out about A in brief).
(then insert any positive things WS has done with you since A exposed this will show he still cares and shes a dummy for beleiving otherwise etc)

I wanted to express myself in the hope that the true nature of their relationship is exposed and maybe this will help my WS find his way home one day. I have invested 22 years of my life in this relationship and despite his repeated A i have stood by him simply because I am not prepared to give up on the family we once were.

If you care about OW then please support her to make the right choices for her family, this does not involve starting a realtionship with a cheater and getting involved in the mess he has created for himself. She seems to be totally oblivious to the fact that he hasnt asked me for a Divorce no matter how much he has been telling her we are over.

I do not know OW well but i do know my WS very well and know that he will be home if she would just wake up and realise he is there because was easly available when he needed something to fill a gap nothing more and let him go and think for himself, if he does not return to me then atleast she can be assured he actually wants her for who she.

Thanks for reading this feel free to contact me should you need any further information etc.

Hi TM, you should ask the mods to merge this with your other threads. We'll be able to see the whole picture when looking back months from now. Just click the "notify" button and ask them to put these together.
BTW, your H's response was TEXTBOOK after exposure. My H said all the same exact things, and guess what? Three years later, we're still together. So it's total BS. Keep exposing. Get to that birthmother, too.

Gee, I know what separation means to me and it doesnt include the dating part, we are still married.

...and to my WH....WH told me it means to him that he can see and do whatever he wants with OW and it is not considered cheating because he left, for some reason he doesnt think it was cheating before he left either though.... Go figure...

My OW son was 13 or 14 at the time of Dday and I wish I exposed to him...why shouldnt they know that their mother helped to break up a family by seeing a married man...

Yeah, but there's the legal issue, minors and all...

Simply because that kid is a teenager and all he sees right now is that TM WS is paying his mums bills and probably buying him goodies to ease the guilt, realistically speaking teenagers dont tend to give a monkeys about what their parents do especially when they are getting the goods out of the situation.