It's shallow to seek such a carnal vindication.


I still gotta admire MikeC2 for going for broke.

They all went to the bottom burning.

I'm not cheering on it for anyone, dude. I just don't want you to carry this attitude on into further relationships.

We are here to help, dude.

Ohh...No, I'm cool w/ that. The RA was totally wrong. I should have just left and divorced her. I'm w/ you on that. So why is Karma in your name? Are you the person you perceived bad Karma?

A BS w/ fast cars, a lot of cash, and a passion for the arts is a BAD COMBINATION....DUDE

don't feel bad, dude. I thought about faking reconciliation with my WH, then waiting til he thought things were going well, and up and kicking him to the curb and breaking his heart the same way he broke mine. I think an RA would be less cruel.
Actually- on D-day, he suggested that maybe I should go sleep with someone else so then we'd be "even".....

I opted for no on both those ideas though.

And if you left him and slept w/ someone 4 months later during divorce proceedings, most on here would consider it an A. Don 't know about RA, but they'd definitely consider it an A!

I looked at the thread Neak and it makes sense. Thx

Does anyone agree with me that with all this talk about Karma we need a poster here named "Sweet" so we could see
"Dude!!" ............. "Sweet!'
??
Above referance to movie "Dude, Wheres my car?"

Interesting discussion.

I think that many men are simple souls, and cannot imagine any other response to the offer of violence than a violent defence. And hitting women is horrible. So they do nothing, thinking "Not hitting back" is a decent thing to do. Some men fear what THEY might become if they unleashed their reaction to their wife's attacks on them.

In my own case, Squid is a 25 year karate veteran with international competition experience. She has always felt it was OK hitting me HARD in play or indignation. I'm a man I should take it right ?

Until a couple of months after d-day she became violent when she found out I had busted a lie she told. She offered me a full on karate attack.

I rugby tackled her and forced her down with my weight and strength, and I said right into her face " WHO gave you the right to hit me ? WHO did ? NEVER hit me, you hear ? I have NEVER hit you, so I DO NOT give you permission to hit me ! Say anything you want but NEVER hit me again !"

She has never offered me physical violence since.

I took a similar approach quite recently with her LBs and gaslighting.

And it has been working amazingly well.

Finally I do recall a man called Mike who was hen-pecked and dominated by his WW. He took his own life. It might have been different if he had not accepted her abuse

Good work on dealing with the abusive wife, Bob.

I was watching a show, "The Mneatlist" the other night and one of the women slapped her boyfriend across the face when she got upset with him for not wearing his bullet proof vest.

I see this type of thing all the time in movies and on TV, where women simply haul off and belt a guy. we seem to just take it for granted that this is okay, maybe because folks seem to think the woman is less strong and cannot really hurt the guy.
But, women, like your wife, are working out these days and can do a lot of damage. Your wife is lucky you controlled your temper and did not belt her.
Really, I even see on some websites where BWs physically attack their WHs and it is much more accepted than if a man did the same.

There could be a reason for that...

I remember the last incident my XW was violent with me. I was still crippled and trying to get myself over to make me some dinner as she refused to even help me feed myself. She had already been busted weeks before on D-Day and I was in no condition to fight.

As I dragged myself across the kitchen floor, I just glared at her and she threw a glass at me and I caught it in mid-air and returned it with three times the force, it hit the wall beside her head and pretty much turned into sand it hit so hard.

On the next recording I retrieved from her car, she said she would NEVER be violent with me again as I could have easily killed her even my worthless crippled state with a glass of all things. She said she had seriously underestimated me and for OM to be VERY careful.

It made me remember that scene in the Chronicles of Riddick when he tells the inmates that he was going to kill them with his tea cup.

There is definetly a double standard...just like there is in many other areas of life.

Kudos to you BP.

>I took a similar approach quite recently with her LBs and gaslighting.


RECENTLY???????????????

Crap.

[/quote]


As I dragged myself across the kitchen floor, I just glared at her and she threw a glass at me and I caught it in mid-air and returned it with three times the force, it hit the wall beside her head and pretty much turned into sand it hit so hard.

On the next recording I retrieved from her car, she said she would NEVER be violent with me again as I could have easily killed her even my worthless crippled state with a glass of all things. She said she had seriously underestimated me and for OM to be VERY careful.

It made me remember that scene in the Chronicles of Riddick when he tells the inmates that he was going to kill them with his tea cup. [/quote]

Sounds too retaliatory to me. I wouldn't have stooped to her level of physical abuse. I'd just turn the other cheek...DUDE

I just hurt myself laughing and not in the friendly, jovial way.

I think its a reminder we ALL fight our demons. And we all want to strike back when hurt. Rather its physical or emotional. DUDE

I have been punched several times, kicked, pinched, had my hair pulled, pushed over something behind me, slapped...

It hurts a little, but most of all the emotional mental pain is a killer from it. I've had to grab her and hold her and one time pushed her against the wall holding, but let go quickly realizing I left parts of myself exposed ripe for knee!!!

I did push her shoulder once in the car after getting hit, smacked and pinched all in a row and told her to stay over by the window. I told her mom and she told her brother, they thought it was funny and her brother is one of the toughest people I've ever met, so I got no sympathy and her mom almost didn't believe it. About 6 mos. ago she dug her fingers into my arm drawing blood (once again) and I told her to let go or I would clock her, she ran into the closet as if I was some deranged wife beater. I've never hit a woman and never will. I could never be violent and don't know how she can be, she just looses it and starts hitting pillows, mattress. Luckily she's never thrown anything, apparently her mom did this.

She could physically beat me, but I think the pain would be emotional.

Mel,

I do fear her verbal and emotional abuse. According to her she's "incapable of hurting anyone" verbally. Her nit picking criticisms are what I fear most, it's relentless. She was raised to ALWAYS give her opinion and imput. It comes in question form sometimes too and it just zaps my energy.

I wish she could keep her trap shut sometimes. Last night would have been a great night if she didn't open up her mouth and spew diarreah out of it!!

Seems we are finally comig to grips with the fact that there are large numbers of abusive women out there(one of my sisters is one of them). I've seen this for a long time.

My advice, first whiff you get of this stuff, run and never look back. If your girlfriend is either physically or emotionally abusive during courtship, it gets worse if you get married.
WTF was I thinking. On the day before our wedding, I got the silent treatment from my XW. My offense: after consulting with her, I accepted an invitation from her dad and brothers to play golf.
This should have been a big warning sign as the silent treatment was her tool of choice in adminstering abuse. It just got progressively worse.

My H begged me to hit him on D-day. He said it would make me "feel better" and he offered to let me hit him as hard as I could as many times as I wanted.

I declined. I think my reaction (or lack thereof) scared him more than if I had gone all crazy and thrown stuff and yelled and hit him. I was eerily calm and silent during most of the discovery.