|
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 981
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 981 |
I know we've discussed this before, but remind me again why Waywards do this? When I went plan D and was running around w/ a lot of women, I still rarely talked to them on the phone.(maybe a quick text here and there lining up dates) It seems waywards(men too?!) LOVE to talk on the phone for hours and hours..What gives? What manly dude chats on the phone all the time. Maybe I don't get it? Maybe I didnt go wayward enough to be a phoneaholic...DUDE
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 1,722
Member
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 1,722 |
Just a guess, but maybe many waywards are missing out on the EN of conversation and affection. Both of which can be provided through the evil cell phone. Seems like teenage behaviour being on the phone all the time. My WW is still in this phase.
Ugggh.
-SOL
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 67
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 67 |
My WH calls his girlfriend every morning at 4:45 am and talkes for 30 to 40 minutes, he also called several times throughout the day and always calls her and talks to her all the way home. I think it is because it is new and there is alot of excitment there. His phone bill was 30 pages just in phone calls.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 981
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 981 |
Just a guess, but maybe many waywards are missing out on the EN of conversation and affection. Both of which can be provided through the evil cell phone. Seems like teenage behaviour being on the phone all the time. My WW is still in this phase.
Ugggh. Ok, I get it from the female side, but what dude wants to chat on the cell phone all the time? None of my friends chat on the cell phone, at all. They only want to text and even that is minimal. I'm the same way. I can't wait to get off the phone. DUDE
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 1,775
Member
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 1,775 |
It truly amazed me , the number of calls and texts that were going back and forth. I think it is pretty pathetic. They are like kids. It is sort of a "me and you against the world" deal, IMO. Just so incredibly sophomoric.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 981
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 981 |
My WH calls his girlfriend every morning at 4:45 am and talkes for 30 to 40 minutes, he also called several times throughout the day and always calls her and talks to her all the way home. I think it is because it is new and there is alot of excitment there. His phone bill was 30 pages just in phone calls. I've been married twice and had a long term girl friend, I NEVER CHATTED w/ them all the time on the phone. I just wouldn't cuz I'm a DUDE!
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 981
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 981 |
It truly amazed me , the number of calls and texts that were going back and forth. I think it is pretty pathetic. They are like kids. It is sort of a "me and you against the world" deal, IMO. Just so incredibly sophomoric. Maybe its a ploy by the cell phone co's to boost revenue? Starting up a bunch of A's. IDK, I think its all part of the madness..DUDE
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 3,772
Member
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 3,772 |
My husband, who HATES talking on the phone, would talk with me for hours when we were dating. And we lived 3 miles apart from each other. Of course, this was back in the mid 80's before cell and texting, so who knows what it would have been today.
When he had his EA a few years ago, he spent hours on the phone with her too.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 6,108
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 6,108 |
A WH has to reel the OW in and most women like conversation. My H talked to xOW on the phone but it was mostly texts/IM. Dude, since you were in Plan D you weren't hiding like cake eater. A WS is trying to hide his real life and family from the OP so they do need to throw the lures out.
BW - me exWH - serial cheater 2 awesome kids Divorced 12/2011
Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.
We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot. --------Eleanor Roosevelt
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 860
Member
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 860 |
My WH calls his girlfriend every morning at 4:45 am and talkes for 30 to 40 minutes, he also called several times throughout the day and always calls her and talks to her all the way home. I think it is because it is new and there is alot of excitment there. His phone bill was 30 pages just in phone calls. When I first glanced at these comments, I read the word to be 'excrement'. I think MY word would've been more appropriate than cc's......... The chatting thing is so prevalent because in-person interaction can be harder to arrange. The ol' cell phone is easier. Safer. It's not a TRUE fix like visiting in person, but it holds over the WS. Maybe that's why the calls are longer and more frequent........ TB
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 10
Junior Member
|
Junior Member
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 10 |
My wife texted and talked to her OM all the time. Sometimes a dozen calls a day and as many as 800 texts in a month. Then there were the pix texts... I think affairs are like Adult Disney land. Just a big world of make believe where dishes don't need to be done and the kids don't have to get tucked into bed. It's where the weak go to pretend to be interesting and fulfilled. Shed responsiblity and hop on the rides - there is no tomorrow in Adult Disneyland!
WW - 30 BH - 33 WW had A 7/08 through 2/09 D-DAY - 9/19/09
2 DS - 9 & 4
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 1,116
Member
|
Member
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 1,116 |
WH and OW -- who now live together -- recently text photos of their -- er -- "privates" to each other. Talk about the mentality of the wayward! And STUPID them (or stupid me) -- the photos were also sent to his email account -- and I now have the Hustler spreads.
Never know what kind of deal I may be able to make with these in the courtroom or beyond. And it's not "revenge" Dude -- it's leverage and ammo.
So not only "massive amounts of phone calls/texts" but "STUPID" calls and texts.
M 25 yrs, 3 teens Dday 12/07 5ish False Recoveries (all in 2008) 12/08 WH moves in w/OW, her kids Plan B/D/FU -- depending on the day He files 1/09; D final 12/2012 "I'm moving on"
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 10,179
Member
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 10,179 |
Tongue in cheek or not, this minimizes ... everything.
A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner. ~ English proverb Neak's Story
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 1,775
Member
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 1,775 |
WH and OW -- who now live together -- recently text photos of their -- er -- "privates" to each other. Talk about the mentality of the wayward! And STUPID them (or stupid me) -- the photos were also sent to his email account -- and I now have the Hustler spreads.
Never know what kind of deal I may be able to make with these in the courtroom or beyond. And it's not "revenge" Dude -- it's leverage and ammo.
So not only "massive amounts of phone calls/texts" but "STUPID" calls and texts. I believe a "mass mailing" may be in order, HH.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 12,357
Member
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 12,357 |
Conversation is definitely an EN of people who spend a lot of time talking. My FWH was no different. But it wasn't always the content of the conversations so much as the contact with someone who was 'into' him, and the newness of the A. Then there was the fantasy that was built into what they were saying - all stuff that has been said by every high-school kid on their first crush.
Toward the end of the A, when OWH was starting to bombard H with threatening texts & emails, the phone calls really went down, as well as office contact. Suddenly things weren't so warm and fuzzy with the reality of the OWH in the picture.
D-Day 2-10-2009 Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever! Thank you Marriage Builders!
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 6,108
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 6,108 |
It is pathetic and the volume is unbelievable but I did notice that even if they texted/IM called each other 500 times a day it wasn't much of a conversation and each text was only a few words. Yep, no, ok, love you, can't talk, later, miss you, xoxo, and other short phrases x 300...that's deep. 
BW - me exWH - serial cheater 2 awesome kids Divorced 12/2011
Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.
We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot. --------Eleanor Roosevelt
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 981
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 981 |
Tongue in cheek or not, this minimizes ... everything. What I meant was even during my RA, I would never chat on the phone with her. It was sort of professional. An email to my work or a quick text of when we were hanging out that night. No long drama phone calls...I think that is why I said I never got the "bug" completely. The madness that is waywardness. DUDE
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 543
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 543 |
It is pathetic and the volume is unbelievable but I did notice that even if they texted/IM called each other 500 times a day it wasn't much of a conversation and each text was only a few words. Yep, no, ok, love you, can't talk, later, miss you, xoxo, and other short phrases x 300...that's deep.  I noticed the same b_r. Hunreds of texts with 2 or 3 words of mostly nonsense and loads about what they had watched on TV, what they had eaten and who was in the gossip columns. Real deep and meaningful..... NOT! My FWH had his phone switched to silent when in his A, but it did vibrate in his pocket when he got a text so maybe that is what he enjoyed.
Me - BW FWH - BB -(PA Jul 08 - Aug 08) D-Day - 8 Aug 2008 Recovering nicely
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 981
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 981 |
Maybe I'm too boring/logical to be a real wayward. I didn't even get into all that high school chit in high school...DUDE
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
Member
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996 |
The part about this that made me really REALLY 
was the phone records showing H would call me daily, usually once I had arrived at work, and have a 2 minute "Thinking about you" conversation with me ... and, once we hung up, an immediate 40 minute call to OW.
It happened time after time.
I figured out it was H's way of making sure I did not call him during his OW-time.
Stupid waynerds
|
|
|
0 members (),
990
guests, and
230
robots. |
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
Forums67
Topics133,627
Posts2,323,509
Members71,991
|
Most Online3,224 May 9th, 2025
|
|
|
|