LG...I do NOT plan on just slinking away....

I can file for adultery in our state and will name OW as co-respondent. I'm sure she won't like that, but with what the PI got on them, it'll be a piece of cake. Yes, there's some vindictiveness to this, but ITS THE TRUTH. Why should I not speak and file the truth?

Letter went out today to be delivered by messenger to H regarding not making further personal contact with me.

He can be cold and dismissive, but I will deal with him on MY terms, not his.

Go, lady, go!!! You rock with class.

God's Blessing,

Say

Furthermore, when I file, I will make sure the campus gossip rag gets a synopsis of the filing anonymously. The "underground" campus paper loves to run stuff like this about profs and also rags on students they get dirt on....

That will put a little more pressure on administration.....

You are my favorite!

I love it!

After 29 years, you'd think the professor would know who he is messing with. :-D

God's Blessings,

Say

I guess I am beginning to get really angry again and also I am feeling less embarrassed and more like HE SHOULD BE EMBARRASSED by his behavior and lack of ethics.

I think that anger is a natural reaction at this point and you have no need to feel embarrassed. You have done nothing wrong. Each time you share the story with someone you will become more empowered. The accelerator is stuck on their Karma bus!!!

God's Blessings,

Say

Hell yeah !

Hey LLL,

He SHOULD BE ashamed of himself. Maybe not today, but maybe one day.....

Reading about you and your sitch reminds me of Mr. T in 'Rocky III'. Regarding the upcoming fight between Mr. T and Rocky, the reporters ask him (Clubber Lang) for a prediction. His response:

"Prediction? Pain......"

Mr LLL is gonna get the horns. Big-time. And it's going to be painful for him....

That's MY prediction.....

TB

I would rather not be in this situation, but I will not go away quietly. I can be a tough competitor....I didn't make it this far in my life being a patsy. And, I didn't make it through the "old boy's club" of my Ph.D. program without being strong. I also resisted the "charms" of a few of my profs in grad school.

LG

You are very wise. Great guidance for LLL.

"Split the assets 60/40 and go for a legal seperation. Overreach. Ask for more than you are entitled too. Sure, the attorneys will have to sort it all out, and it might cost you a little more, but the amusement factor might be high....

He WANTS you to go quietly. What he doesn't understand is that YOU hold all the cards.

Have him served with the Divorce papers in his classroom.
Have the OW served with a subpoena at the same time to show up for a disposition. Helps if you can have them served while in the same classroom..........................."

Hmmmm.....I like it. Going to see what attorney and process server can do........

And of course, I had NO IDEA these documents would be delivered at the university!!!!

Please do this. Not many states left that you can cite adultery. Speak and file the truth.

And yes to tipping off the student paper.

(((((LLL))))) You are doing great.

You should not be embarrassed. Hold your head high and do the right thing. On your terms.

Love in Christ,
Miss M

3L:

Your line:


Process servers want to do it the easy, inexpensive way. Killing two birds with one stone? Priceless!

LG

You might have to stipulate that part. My mom had my dad picked up at work when he wouldn't go to court but that was the only place they knew he would be.

Ask others but maybe you can talk to the sherrifs Dept or the servers and slip them a 20?, (not the sherriffs tho)

Go LLL Go you rock!!

Please don't get all soft and mushy and feel bad about this. He deserves a swift kick over the Uni goal-post.

Someday "recepticle" will betray him and he will look down between his legs and ask..

"Why do I ever listen to you?" but it will be to late and he will be to old to get anyone much less a woman of your character.

For Gods sake the sooner his house of cards falls the better for him and all the rest of the human race.

WOW....you go triple L...go go go go go!!! Cheers..I'm having a glass of vino in your honor...SALUTE. You are a tough cookie and I admire you tremendously. ruby

Why should I not speak and file the truth?

After all it is his secret not yours

Just an additional bit of pressure on the administration - If the gossip rag also had information that the administration was apprised of the affair and failed to act on it could be very embarrassing for them. It makes them look like they are complicit in the affair and still harboring the old boys club. It seems to me that this could be a sticky situation for them to deal with.

I was in a large corporation for a number of years. The old boys club was alive and well and there were numerous situations where people were sleeping their way to the top. Once the sexual harassment legislation came in the tone changed in the organization. Even if both parties were in agreement in the relationship, the fact that one of the parties had influence over the other party, caused many a career to become impacted. For a period of time getting caught in this type of arrangement was the kiss of death for ones career. This impacted all levels, from Directors to VP's. It went under the "demonstrates poor judgment" heading.

It also created havoc for those who were in the chain of command. If they were aware of what was going on, and did not move swiftly to address the issue, they were dragged in to the mess as well. They were all afraid of the potential of a "sexual harassment" claim. In a publicly traded company it was taken very seriously.

So much depends on the political climate. I think the gossip mag could prove to be a very messy salvo for all concerned to deal with. In my opinion this will become the biggest issue for them to deal with "Loss of Credibility". The insinuations of "preferential treatment" for the adulteress will linger and be a source of angst for the wayward professor and the administration to deal with.