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Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 42
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OP
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Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 42 |
HappilyMovingOn, thanks for the good advice. Those are all excellent items to stand firm on. I don't feel the need for #1, we have already done #2, she has agreed to #3 and is enthusiastic about #4. #5 is a good idea and would definitely show a commitment to being a fiscally responsible adult.
SugarCane, Plan 'B' went from Thanksgiving last year past Christmas. I guess I'm wondering what the benefit to maintaining Plan B would be right now?
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 2,965
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 2,965 |
How did Plan B end, Nexus?
Did you have conditions in your Plan B letter?
Did she meet them?
I agree she seems to be make noises like she wants to get out of the OM thing. I'm concerned, though, that you are setting a bad precedent if you broke Plan B w/o her meeting your conditions, and now you're considering testing the waters with her again... and she's still living with OM.
Why have boundaries or conditions if you're going to ignore them?
What does this teach her about your "boundaries" and how likely is she to respect them in the future?
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Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 945
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Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 945 |
How did Plan B end, Nexus?
Did you have conditions in your Plan B letter?
Did she meet them?
I agree she seems to be make noises like she wants to get out of the OM thing. I'm concerned, though, that you are setting a bad precedent if you broke Plan B w/o her meeting your conditions, and now you're considering testing the waters with her again... and she's still living with OM.
Why have boundaries or conditions if you're going to ignore them?
What does this teach her about your "boundaries" and how likely is she to respect them in the future? ITA - and something else to consider Nexus - you are teaching her how to treat you. If you play KISA for this kind of betrayal she will most likely commit some future betrayal because you're teaching her you will be her KISA no matter what. Don't take this lightly. And the next time you will hate yourself more than you will hate her because you will know you taught her to treat you this way. Gg
D-Day #1 Aug/2007.
D-Day #2 1/27/12
Legally Separated
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