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I relate to broken no contact: I am in the very stages of ending an 18 year affair. The OM is also married and we have been involved in community projects and he sits on my board of directors. I can't tell you how many times over the years I have tried to end this relationship but it has never worked. I see him, I miss him and all I have to do is call. I would like to make it work and end it. It do not want to tell my husband. We have experienced new technology over the years that has made it easier to stay in contact and now its hard not to. any advice.
Last edited by Revera; 03/25/10 05:40 PM. Reason: adding title
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I relate to broken no contact: I am in the very stages of ending an 18 year affair. The OM is also married and we have been involved in community projects and he sits on my board of directors. I can't tell you how many times over the years I have tried to end this relationship but it has never worked. I see him, I miss him and all I have to do is call. I would like to make it work and end it. It do not want to tell my husband. We have experienced new technology over the years that has made it easier to stay in contact and now its hard not to. any advice.  There are no "stages" to ending an affair. It's either ended, or not. I guess .... NOT.
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BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING  Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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. It do not want to tell my husband. Your husband has a right to know what you have done to him behind his back. So does the OM's wife. They will need to be told first, in addition to ending all contact with the OM. You have committed a horrendous crime against your H and the OM's wife and they have to know so they can protect themselves from your evil. Additionally, they will both need to be tested for STDs because there is no telling what vile diseases you have transmitted to these innocent people. No doubt, you shagged your adultery partner over the years. The first step towards recovery is HONESTY, so that is where I would start so your victims can protect themselves from you. You are very dangerous and cruel, SH. 
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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It do not want to tell my husband.
Don't you want your husband to know the real you?
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Has betrayed woman's husband fathered any of your children?
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Seeking harmony, where do you and the OM go to get it on?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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That was a good eye opener...no contact is the only way. I know telling would end it but I'm not ready to put my family through the heartache. I really want to do move away and work on this affair being just a friendship. Is that possible? I'm new to blogging but just reading comments has been extremely helpful.
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no. we've been married for 30 years. He likes what he knows
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good for you! Did you tell or were you told. I would rather be the one who was told than the one who tells
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That was a good eye opener...no contact is the only way. I know telling would end it but I'm not ready to put my family through the heartache. This is a lie. If you were concerned about that, you wouldn't have done this to your husband. More lying is not the solution. The solution to adultery is honesty. It is cruel and manipulative to continue to lie your victims. I really want to do move away and work on this affair being just a friendship. Is that possible? Of course not. You are not "friends." He is not your "friend." Any man who gets it on with a married woman is not being a "friend" to her. He has just spit in her face. He has been spitting in your face and using you as an unpaid whore for 18 years. You are a threat to the OM's wife and the OM is a threat to your husband. They need to be told this truth and all contact must end between you and your adultery partner.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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we travel occasionally for work or go to a hotel. because we have been friends since our junior year in high school going to lunch or catching a drink has never been a problem. For years the family did things together and it just became "normal". I know it seems crazy but we thought no one was getting hurt.
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I know it seems crazy but we thought no one was getting hurt. I guess your victims will be the best judge of that.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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SH,
For Gods sakes tell your husband, my wife had an "emotional affair", EA, 20 years ago, and I ignored it for many years after, but it never went away, and facts continue to trickle out.
I've had bad dreams about it over the years too, I think on some level I understood, what my waking mind could not bear. I suspect your husband knows something too. People know more than they know they know.
God Bless
Gamma
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