Oh yeah, and you can bet your bottom dollar that though men make lots of jokes regarding women - that you'd be seriously hard pressed to find a man that really wanted a woman to be like a man - naaaaaaaaaa uuuuuuuuhhhhhh - nooooooo way!!! Know why? Because they like us, they REALLY like us!

And they depend on us FOR our being different from them - the same way we depend on them for being different than us...

Pretty cool, I think...

Mrs. W

And you are going on the assumption that Mr. W is somehow prejudice against women - or any other group that you named above - The problem is that your assumption is DEAD WRONG...Why not assume the BEST? That Mr. W respects women so much that he believes them to be capable of getting and taking a joke?

As his wife, I can tell you that is what he believes...

Mrs. W

Looks to me like she quoted me as a reminder that there are at least three people on this thread that weren't charmed by the vid.

For me, the negative reaction has a lot to do with the fact that I see mockery as inherently negative. I've got a razor-sharp sense of humor otherwise, but this just doesn't make the cut.

My BEST FRIENDS pretty much have carte blanche to mock me, but that's because that relationship has been reinforced by years and years of demonstrated love and care. Still inherently negative, but they're OK because my LB$ is firmly in the black with them. Besides, with them I can read the subtle cues that they don't mean it.

With this guy, I just can't tell. And I don't know him, his organisation or the people who like him well enough to let THEIR high opinion of him sway me.

Groetjes,
WolfDeca

P.S. Mark, can you post the part where he informs men that women are different from men? I'd like to see how he asks the men to change to accommodate their women. Wondering if he uses the same tactics there, and if I'll feel as icky on behalf of the guys as I did on behalf of the gals.

You know what scares me on this thread? That more and more posts that I read from the women that are protesting so vehemently, the more my belief that "women love men" is getting shot down - the underlying tone of many of those posts are making me feel that it is the MEN who are really being bashed here - and very harshly and disrespectfully judged -- that makes me very sad...

Mrs. W

Again, I think this boils down to TRUSTING that men love women - just as you trust your friends...Okay, so sure the comedian is a stranger to you - but note that there were many women in the audience laughing just as hard as the men - surely that must allay some of your fears?

This was a MALE comedian - speaking from the only perspective that he is capable of speaking - the MALE perspective - Nothing wrong with that in my view...

Mrs. W

You know what that is great for you and Mr W, however that is not the case with Mr SC and myself. Mr SC already has a very fond thing of telling me "well you shouldn't feel that way" and because he believes i shouldn't feel then way then "magically" i just "shouldn't feel that way.

That is why i said that i would not want my h to listen to the video because he could then "justify" is "magic" by saying, see this guy thinks the same way.....

And i did not find the comedian funny, i found him mocking and i agree with what wolfdeca said, i am all for a joke and i even mock myself and my friends all the time and they mock me as well, however i do not know this man in any way shape or form and if i were to just walk into somewhere he was speaking and hesrd just the first video i would feel insulted.

I didn't take one thing he said as "mocking" - but I think that is because I TRUST that he loves women - that he was in front of that audience CELEBRATING the differences between men and women - and you know what? I took it as a great COMPLIMENT that he said that everything in a woman's brain is connected - why wouldn't I? That's COOL dang it!

Also, I already KNOW that I am smart, capable, engaging and generally fun to be around, [I'm the BEST at modesty, btw ] so even if I really thought the comedian was bashing women, I wouldn't care - I'd let it roll off my back as HIS ISSUE...If you are one of those that feels the comedian is shortchanging women, ask yourself the simple question, "Is what he is saying TRUE about ME?", and if it's not, then who cares, right?

Mrs. W

I wanna go on record as saying that I love men...

um, I mean, I love ONE man...

Well, and my two little men...

... and Ben and Jerry of course, they're men...

... they are God's gift to women.

The way you said that made me think. (MrsWondering, I mean, not jayne, although the board says that's who I'm replying to.)

Actually, I don't believe MEN love WOMEN. Nor that WOMEN love MEN. I believe both men and women are complicated and multifaceted creatures, with both rational and irrational likes and dislikes. Not every man will be able to get along with every woman, or vice versa. Yes, of course you can reasonably generalise the genders to some extent, but I don't think we can just swap hubbies and call it OK.

For me, while every person on earth has my well wishes and I respect both their individual sovereignty and their general good intentions, love is extremely personal and trust, especially, is earned over time. An unknown person is a black box, and only time and interaction will tell if we are either compatible or invested enought to be willing to build compatibility.

So, it may be that your 'love' is my 'general feeling of okayishness towards, even though I wouldn't let just anyone babysit my newborns,' but that would imply that men also love men and women also love women, right?

As a matter of fact, I think 'gender A' loving 'gender B' PRECLUDES real love and trust. (Unless of course, you just meant 'people' loving 'people.') Generalising THAT much means automatically that you don't clearly see the person, but only through a filter of the group they belong to. Generalised trust of women wouldn't help you if you were faced with a woman out to demolish you, and loving men because they're so 'handy and stoic' (to name some popular strengths generally attributed to guys) doesn't help build a relationship if your man happens to be clutzy and extraverted.

So yeah, we kinda disagree on love and trust. But on the other hand, I only really trust those who I can give my creditcard and KNOW they won't rob me, and I believe that love is a verb.

And no, I don't go around scared of everything including my own shadow. I love meeting new people and finding out what makes them tick, and don't feel anxious around people at all. But still, I wouldn't hand just anyone my cc or baby.

Most importantly, I guess, I believe women and men both have equal rights to bad taste in jokes, so women laughing doesn't necessarily mean the joke was actually GOOD.

WD

P.S. Still Crazy, your point is dead on as well. Why give someone who has a track record of hitting you with a small stick, a bigger stick? Love is a verb, love is a verb, love is a verb.

Well, okay, feelings just "are", that is true...but are you sifting through your own feelings to make sure they are valid - are you sabotaging yourself with negative self talk?

Okay, I am gonna tell you guys an embarrassing story about ME - to help explain what I mean - I cannot believe I am gonna tell this - note that I care an awful lot to do this...[*deep breath*]...Here goes...

Alright, I have a flat butt - there, I said it - it's pancake patootie - looks like I lost the sucker in some freak accident or something! [luckily, I have, ahem, other assets ]

ANYWAY...

I bought padded panties to combat this "condition" - okay, go ahead and laugh like crazy - I KNOW it sounds funny - let me remind you though that women have worn padded bras for YEARS, and no one bats an eyelash!

So, the point is, when I wear them, Mr. W stares at my backside like crazy - admiringly so - the other day, I had them on [under jeans] and was lying on my stomach on our bed, and he said, "I just can't quit staring at your butt, it looks so good"...


Now, in my head I started negative self talk - saying stuff like, "OMG, for absolute YEARS he's been looking at my flat butt and thinking GROSS!" - "I bet I have been such a turn-off to him!" and other negative thoughts - and then I stopped myself cold...

And instead, I CHOSE to TAKE THE COMPLIMENT AT FACE VALUE...To respect Mr. W enough to trust that he wouldn't say anything to hurt me - that he sincerely meant what he said as complimentary to me - because he LOVES me - because I am his TEAM MATE - and men don't shoot down their team mates - no way!

So maybe sometimes SC, you really shouldn't "feel that way" - as disrespectful as I know that sounds...It's just that sometimes we can engage in so much negative self-talk that we sabotage lots of the good in life - or at least I know I've sure been guilty of that in the past...

Mrs. W

What an interesting and amusing thread! The comedian said that women have a tendency to judge men's "motivations" and sure enough, some of us are doing that very thing! YES WE SURE DO! Guilty!

I watched the videos and didn't find anything insulting, but I can tell you surely that I would have been DAMN OFFENDED about it 20 years ago after being raised by a radical feminazi who had a chip on her shoulder and believed that empowerment came through victimhood. She distrusted all men and left me with that warped legacy. [thank GOD the left brain eventually kicked in and I overcame it]

I was raised to view men as evil "oppressors" and taught to view any mention of the differences between men and women as a PUT DOWN. Oddly, I never caught - until later - on that being offended by that WAS a put down because it simply meant *I* viewed female traits as inferior. I was not the brightest bulb either.

Anyway, I thought the guy was hilarious but what do I know?

Dr Harley does talk about some of this stuff on his radio show. For example, he speaks about how different the female brain is from the male brain in that the female brain is much more complicated. Men tend to be very simple [not stupid, but simple] and have a tendency to compartmentalize. He gives an example where Joyce asks him while driving what he is deep in thought about. He said, nothing, just thinking about that billboard! He agreed with the comedian that men often just think about nothing, hence the "empty box" comment.

Ya know what would be fun? Heading over to a domestic violence forum and posting comedic videos about beating your wife.

What? It's funny.

AWESOME POST!!!!!

Wow. That's an intelligent post for a Texan.

I don't think MrsW meant it to the extreme of swapping husbands or giving out credit cards. Her point is that men do not have this nefarious ulterior motive that some of we women oddly ascribe to them. Sure, some do, but overall they don't. They are generally simple and tend to like/love women. I have worked with all men for the last 21 years, and that pretty much describes them. As a rule, they are kind, well intentioned, and go out of their way to help others. So when they make a joke about the differences between men and women, it is usually said with affection.

I couldn't make the same generalization about women, though. I think it heard it best put by a mother who raised both boys and girls: "I always knew where the boys stood on everything; my girls always had agendas." That pretty much sums up me and my 5 sisters for sure!

I keep chuckling to myself how we have proven the comedian right on this thread.

Who let these silly foreigners in here!!??

Anyone can find any a-hole to support any position.

They're 'ferriners'. sheesh. You cain't even drawl right!

Maybe I'm just conceited, Wolf! Because I guess my premise is that everyone is gonna like me [and I them], UNTIL they prove otherwise - I mean hey, I'm likable - I believe that is a FACT - operating on that premise has served me well - and like I said in an earlier post - if someone says something that I perceive to be negative about me, then I ask myself, "Is it true?"...If it's not true, then who cares? That's their issue, yes? And if it is true, then I have some work to do, huh? They helped me out!

It wouldn't matter to me if the comedian was saying that women were somehow less [which, as I've said, I don't think he was]...Because I know THE TRUTH - that I am NOT less - I am NOT a victim of "the man" - I AM CAPABLE - I AM INTELLIGENT - I AM FUNNY - I AM [insert positive quality here]...I AM A WOMAN - and I am VERY PROUD of all the things that make me a woman - DIFFERENCES and all...Those differences make me capable of some pretty amazing things - just like the differences of men make them capable of some pretty amazing things - and it's super cool when both realize that - and use their differences to COMPLIMENT each other...Trying to deny that there are differences between men and women seems counterproductive to me...Saying we are different doesn't mean that one is better than the other...Not at all...

Mrs. W

P.S. I wasn't saying that kind of "trust" btw - not the "keep my newborn"/"hold my ccrd" kind of trust...I just meant that I hold the basic belief that men dig women and women dig men - that they aren't adversaries - being married to Mr. W no doubt helps me with that - because I promise you with every fiber of my being that you'd be hard pressed to find a man that loved and respected women more - he's amazing like that - since he doesn't behave as my adversary, it does make it easier for me to trust that men in general are not my adversaries - I have an advantage there...I am blessed.

P.P.S. I know you might find that hard to believe due to his silliness on this thread - but please note how important it was to him to come back and explain himself to ChrisinNova - and he did that on his own - no prodding from me - Mr. W is one that would worry about hurting someone's feelings - that would NEVER be his intent...He's a gem!

I do not believe i am in many instances with my h, like when my h tells me that he is only "being friendly" with someone who has just practically threw herself on him and i tell him that i felt like she was "flirting with him and he was eating it up", he tells me "well i wasn't and you shouldn't feel that way" that i am not self doubting anything since the woman just poured water down his back and told him "there now don't that feel better".

I am sure i am guilty of the self negativeness as well, i will tell my own embarrassing story. i have small breasts and have always been self conscious about them anyway and sometime after D-day we were discussing something about the A and i was upset about the fact of the FOW being beautiful. My h said "who said she was beautiful" and i said "you did" and he then told me "well she had fat legs and a big stomach, the only thing good about her was she had a nice smile, eyes, and breasts. Now mind you i know that he was trying to make me feel better by those comments but now they STILL linger in my mind, so i am sure that i would have a hard time excepting a compliment about any of those things from him......