Hi Mel and everybody else,
I have stayed out of this thread for what almost 2 years now. However, the last few pages I found very thought provoking. In reading them it triggered several thoughts. I'll just list them and then discuss them.
1. I am assuming the discussion has continued about being �gropped� by someone you actually like/love.
2. It occurs to me that men often do this because we are tactile by nature and would like our W�s to do this to us.
3. It occurs to me that us guys don�t know how women really feel about it.
4. It occurs to me that women aren�t as good at multitasking as us guys think they are and as good as we are told by women they are.
5. It occurs to me men have a very hard time seeing it from a woman�s point of view.
Now these points seem self-evident but the discussion in the last few pages suggests these points and they made me think which is known to be a �dangerous� thing.
I think #1 is a deeper point than some realize. I think that many guys would say �but we are in love and married� what can be wrong with that. They understand it is wrong for a man to grope a woman that they don�t know or not married to�at least most do. But, given the intimacy that is shared, a simple pat on the fanny or a quick feel doesn�t seem out of line unless it is in public.
Given the thought just mentioned in #1, then the other points sort of follow along right?
#2 is something I have not seen mentioned, or don�t recall from reading this thread (I am qualified to hide my own Easter eggs folks so remember that). Men do like it when their W�s touch them, but interestingly don�t like contact with other men or even other women unless it is in sports. Interestingly, this is very much in line with Harley�s point that we often try to meet our spouses needs the way WE want the same need met or as if they have the same need. I�ll get back to this in a moment.
#3 This point occurred to me as I believe men hear women complain about them so much that this gets catalogued as just another complaint and the serious nature of this particular issue is not appreciated. Heck all you have to do is watch TV and the list of complaints about men is very very long, so why is this one more important than many others? That is really what LG and others were trying to get at: How to convince men that this complaint rises above the level of �you left the toilet seat up�AGAIN�.
#4 I put this one in to fire up Mel and her Pink Pistol.
The woman is far too calm for my tastes
Princessmeggy said �My complaint about this is that it usually always happens when I'm busy in the kitchen.� Don�t like your H messing up the concentration PM??? I will say that I must be like your H I do like the shape of women and the back side looks as good as the front when it comes to shape. So sue me.  But seriously I can see where people don�t like to be surprised.
#5 LG was actually touching on this. No one really knows or understands how another person feels and it is difficult to see another�s point of view and to know how their past and upbringing might affect how they will interpret a given action. Throw in the fact that men and women are very different and it is difficult to the other�s point of view.
So actually this is what got me thinking. I love it when my W touches me. I am not wild about being surprised but touch??? You bet. Hence I have a hard time seeing why she would not like it. HOWEVER, when I really think about it I do have a problem with touch. I am a tall man and a large man. People tend to notice me, but it constantly amazes me that in a crowd people will walk right into me and mostly it is women and it really annoys me.
Why? I was an athlete and I do have considerable body awareness. I just don�t see how a 100-120 lb woman thinks it is ok to walk into anyone much less someone 6�4� and 250 lbs. That just isn�t good for her health. Men simply don�t walk into or bump into other men. We don�t like touch unless it is associated with a contact sport. I am not sure exactly why but it seems to me this is the case.
So why am I rambling along? Well the conversation of LG and the responses interested me. Men cannot understand women�s lack of interest in touch given that we seem the hugging, and touching one another. Women cannot see our interest in touch because we men don�t do it as part of our natural interaction. Or perhaps women only see men touch in an aggressive manner in contact sports or fighting. I don�t know. But I do think that if women explain it to men within a context that men can understand such as asking their men �how do you feel when another man bumps into you?� then perhaps they will get the idea.
You view it as an act of aggression just as men view another man bumping into them as an act of aggression because we KNOW men are aware of who and what is around them.
Ok, I�ll back into hiding now before Mel shows up with her Pink Pistol.
JL
