Thats why its so great.

What about?
It could be relevant.



They aren't the "We just want him to be happy" type are they?

His parents are in Dallas and we're in El Paso. We were going to meet them halfway, in Midland, with the kids so they could have the kids for Spring Break. We broke down only two hours out of El Paso and his parents wouldn't drive the extra couple of hours to come get them. That's why he's mad and hasn't really talked to them.

They always say they're praying for us. That's what they said when they found out about my As. I don't know how they'll react when the roles are reversed.

Question: How much evidence is enough to expose? The texts I have, one says, "I love you, after 12 yrs I can say that" or something of the like. I'm sure he could say he meant it as a "friend". Ya know? The other one was talking about thinking about her body parts... still no evidence of PA. Gotta wait till he goes to school so I can check his laptop but I really doubt there was a PA... could be wrong, of course.

Interesting.

Do his parents know OW?

I think they know of her. They went to high school together. They're not great friends or anything. Just know each other.

Thats up to you, but I think you need a little more.

This may be helpful.

Exposure is not to punish the WS, or turn everyone against WS, it's purpose is to kill the affair. When you expose you ask those you expose to; to help you save your marriage.

Your In-Laws may be able to help by contacting OW and her Parents and ask her to stay out of there son's marriage and there grandchildren family.

{{{{{{{{Margie}}}}}}}}}

I was thinking about you and hoping your situation was improving!!

My thoughts (sadly): His EA is probably PA too. And yes, disgustingly, him not wanting SF with you probably means he's getting it elsewhere or feels like he's cheating on OW (I found emails to this effect exchanged between my WH and POSOW. Was like a knife in my heart).

First thing, I don't think that "I love you I can say that after 12 years" can possibly be construed as friendly. It's romantic. Star crossed lovers, and all that. So yes, I would call his mom and talk to her.

Expose first. Don't tell him about it.

Will post more as I think of it. I'm so sorry we were right!

Oh what about when I expose. And he says, "I never did that to you!" He made me tell our mothers and like I said, sometimes had something on his Facebook status about it. He never really exposed me like I am about to do to him...

Have a few errands to run now that he left. When I get back I'll be all over his laptop and will update. Wish me luck.

It doesn't matter what he says to you. He didn't do it to you and did your marriage work? TRUST in MB!! He's going to be angry, for sure. Very angry. But, your situation was also different from his. You had a couple ONS, you were not involved in a relationship with either man and you definitely did not tell them you loved them.

He is much deeper under the fog, because he has emotion invested in this as well.

Replay with "How do you feel about Burgers for dinner?"

Or

"Would you like a glass of sweet tea?"

For some reason I find this statement Disturbing!

Mainly because it seems rather dismissive.

Oh no, I did NOT mean to dismiss Margie's actions!! They were wrong wrong wrong!!! And even Margie recognizes that!

All I meant was.....yes, he never did that to her. But she also never carried on a relationship that he had to expose to end it. She chose to end it herself and is working hard on the marriage. He's having at LEAST a long term EA.

Margie,

I fled your first thread like my hair was on fire once it was determined that your current marriage is adultery born. Around here they are called affairages. I don�t participate in those threads. If my WxW got married to her POSOM (and they are still living together) and then one day showed up here looking for advice to save her affairage because, Horrors!! He�s Cheating. I am SOOOOO shocked! Please Help Me!! Simply put, I would not be a happy camper if posters here tried to help. I would be quite offended.

I notice now that a few others that posted to you that day have not returned either.

I don�t want to know anything about your first husband; how abusive he was, deadbeat, blah, blah, frikkity justified blah. Whatever. My sympathies are with him.

That said, I noticed all the traffic on your thread today and see that one of my first posts to you suggested your WH is indeed wayward was correct.

You started out as an affairage, you have committed adultery twice and now your husband is wayward again.

Your situation is nearly impossible to recover. Harley will try to help affairages but even he indicates he has a very low outcome for recovery for these.

So the only thing I will say to you and never return to your thread is that only the Harleys can help you now. If it is too expensive for you then the value of your affairage is very, very low.

Good luck.

I had forgotten she was still married when she started dating her current husband.
(This is why multiple threads about the same subject by the same poster are a bad idea)

Yea, affairages have a dismally low likelihood of survival.

Margie, how long have you been married to your current husband?









Edit..........
Found it, 6yrs.

5 1/2 yrs.

I had forgotten you were married too at the beginning of your relationship.

Margie, yes, chances of survival are low. Your best bet is MB and the Harleys.

And if it ends.....you know the path for next time. Good luck.

Thats about the max shelf life of an Affairage.




I have a question.
At one point you asked WH/BH/OM1 to move out of your home.
Now you want to save your marriage.

What has changed?

At the time I thought I wanted freedom, I wanted out, I wanted to be on my own.

I grew up.

I guess thanks for the advice and support since I won't be getting much anymore.

Margie, you will still have support and advice. Keep posting. Keep trying. Good luck.

There are other FWW's on here who have fantastic marriages now. Keep that in mind. Your best bet REALLY is MB.

Thank you NP. I just went through his laptop and nothing. I'm thinking there might be more to come since the "I love you" TM was just from 3am this morning. I may have caught this really new?

I don't know! I want to expose him but at the same time, I know I don't really have much evidence to go on...

Yes I am in an affairage. I don't think that means I shouldn't try and keep my marriage together.

Do you have access to his emails?