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talked to him about it during the break, but sort of generalizing.
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Ask for Fall in Love, Stay in Love! 
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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I have that on the way with LB, already! 
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Oh, I missed that. Okay. Get your husband to read that one, some day. 
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Ok, so the consensus is to basically continue Plan A. It is hard when you know your H thinks your family life is too much, but I know I get overwhelmed by it when I am home with the kids all day.
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Are you disappointed, Vib?
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Just took their advice about incorporating other friends in that we BOTH like. I just asked my H to call his friend to see if he and his wife and their 2 yr old wanted to come down for a BBQ this weekend (they live about 45 minutes away). I think we are going to FINALLY see some sun this weekend!!! This is one of my H's favorite people, so I am hoping this will deposit some change into his LB.
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The take-away I got out of it is that your H needs to get onboard or your M isn't going to make it.
That's why I suggested you get a session with Steve...that's his specialty, is getting waywards to commit to fixing the M.
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Just took their advice about incorporating other friends in that we BOTH like. I just asked my H to call his friend to see if he and his wife and their 2 yr old wanted to come down for a BBQ this weekend (they live about 45 minutes away). I think we are going to FINALLY see some sun this weekend!!! This is one of my H's favorite people, so I am hoping this will deposit some change into his LB. This is great!
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Thanks, Susie. I got that out of it, too. Thing is, he seemed pretty clear not to do a bunch of "marriage fixing" this summer. Just get as much alone time together as possible. Then we set the foundation to get him on board? I might have also garnered this from our talks during the breaks that are not heard on the show...
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Thanks, Susie. I got that out of it, too. Thing is, he seemed pretty clear not to do a bunch of "marriage fixing" this summer. Just get as much alone time together as possible. Then we set the foundation to get him on board? I might have also garnered this from our talks during the breaks that are not heard on the show... Man, you shoulda had a VAR handy...
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Why would I be disappointed? I thought it went well. I agree that you need to get your husband on board. Wrote some notes down while you were on - basically I got the same impression. Make this summer fun and enjoyable. Less focus on 'relationship' talk and more focus on creating fun experiences for the two of you without the kids. Reconnect as a couple.
I did notice, however that Dr. Harley advised that if your H doesn't get on board then a separation would be in order. You gotta get your H on board, and I think that is very doable especially over the summer.
Glad you're scheduling some time with good friends. I like how Joyce brought that up - schedule time for you as a couple and time with GOOD friends and there wont be any time for other friends.
Me & DH: 28 Married 8/20/05 1DD, 9 mo. Just Lookin' and Learnin' HIYA!
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You wrote some notes down? Wow! That is so thoughtful!
A summer is a long time! We have a big 4th of July party here every year, tons of kids running around - maybe we should cancel it? Thinking MORE kids + beer + friend (the one I don't like) might be a recipe for disaster, although I have really enjoyed these for the past 4 years. During this time, we also have good friends of his coming from CA to visit for a week (they visit once a year and I adore them both, and now they have a baby).
Ok, I am going to give our bedroom a thorough cleaning because right now it is a mess and smells like a puppy (she sleeps in here). Have it ready for when he gets home tonight (and the older 2 go with their father).
Wish me luck. I swear I am Bipolar and can go from feeling great to like hell in 2.5! THINK POSITIVE.
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EA: 2 months, ending June 08
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Maybe some of the other members with 3+ kids could give me some extra ideas.
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EA: 2 months, ending June 08
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Hey, I got some thoughtfulness! H called me while he was in his office, so we could talk for a while during what would be OW's arrival with her students to his school, so I would know he was NOT welcoming her, or with her during her 15 minute Meet N Greet. He KNEW this time would be a trigger for me, and I would be sitting at home wondering "did she go into his office, did he pass her in the hall", etc... That was nice and I piled on the appreciation.
BS: 37
FWH: 37
EA: 2 months, ending June 08
Married 7 years
4 kids (2 together)
Hoping for a Recovery
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Oh, and I polished up every inch of our bedroom (we get a lot of dust up here from the trees, I guess), put on clean sheets, have the candles going to make it smell nicer than a wet puppy lol. I figured it it looked really nice when he came home, it smelled good and the bed looked inviting, he might want to spend some time with me in it. 
BS: 37
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EA: 2 months, ending June 08
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I thought you said he assured you he would be offsite during her visit??
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Nope, his meeting was canceled district-wide.
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Maybe some of the other members with 3+ kids could give me some extra ideas. He told you to join church so you can find a babysitter?? 
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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