Ever notice these things always happen on the beginning of the weekends? Now I get to sit around all weekend twiddling my thumbs and being a baby.

Guess it doesnt matter when PB starts because it doesnt end.

well my emotional crash is over for now. Stopped crying. I LBed a bit after she told me. Nothing terrible though.

Im kinda disappointed my WW is such a coward. Didnt even want to try. She says she loves me but just isnt happy with where we are. No crap. She wont go anywhere with me. Wont give me a chance to build up her love bank. Wont talk to Dr H. Only thing she wants to do is run. Hope she keeps running a while. I dont think she can run away far enough to get away from herself. Its gonna be hard for her to pull herself up out of the cesspool of a life she has created for herself.

Anyways going to go watch some TV. Might try to run some later. Maybe I can run away for a bit just like she did.

Yeg, I got a bit backlogged and just got caught up on your posts...I basically had almost the same situation and have had the same experiences with women up to this point. They all have cheated on me, but! This experience has made me a lot stronger and I think it will for you as well.

My WW ultimately came back after she ran out of money, became homeless and lost in court. It was reality. Can you imagine how stupid you would feel if you were in her shoes after all that? I know that sounds harsh. I'm just trying to point out that this IS the best way for you right now.

My WW tortured the $hi7 out of me for weeks with the crying and the going back and forth from me to him. Letting me pay her bills and buy her jewelry and flowers, until one day, the divorce became final, and I threw her out of my life. I wouldn 't talk to her unless it was about arrangement with my kids, and she ultimately began to realize after dating and getting beat up by her boyfriend that I was not such a bad guy after all. I demanded at that point that she change all passwords, blah blah blah, but ironicaly it has worked out.

Point being that once people are ultimatly faced with the reality of their lives and the consequences as they have designed them to be, they are shocked at how ridiculous they have been acting. I think at this point you should be happy and hopeful for this Plan B, because you are going to be surprised at how good you feel when you don't have to worry about making someone else feel good all the time, and punishing yourself or hearing her punish you for all the bad things that you once did.

I'm telling you, man. In about two weeks you will feel pretty fickin good, and in about 2 months...?

I melted down and clawed and begged on my knees, and humiliated myself before MB. Looking at your posts, I feel like a shmuck that I did do as much pitiful crap as I did, but hey.

One thing you might consider are some other materials on becoming attractive and flitations and such. It will make you more attractive otherwise. Good Luck!

She will regret it. Im sure of that.

Im already feling better. I was down for 2 weeks when i found out about the A. Its been maybe 2 hrs and im ok. Not 100% but im functioning.


Im not begging anymore. Its useless anyways. My sister yold me I needed to listed to what she is telling me. WW is done. She wants a D. She isnt that good of a prize anyways. ATM all WW needs to be doing is moving out of the house and out of my life. Im going plan B anyways. Not really to preserve my love for her as much as to ween me off of her. I dont want table scraps.

As we can all see this WW was just jerking her BH along. There should of been no flowers, no time to think it over.

Talked to the WW.

She was at her parents house. Told her I needed some time to think and would like for her to stay at her parents house until I decided what I wanted to do. I told her I was really hurt with how ive been treated the last 2 years and im not sure I wanted to be in the M. I told her I tried everything I could but I cant fix this by myself.

I talked to FIL briefly. Asked him when she was coming over to get her stuff. he seemed shocked. Dont know why. Its his daughter that wants a D. I almost said not me but I dont know if thats the case anymore. I may want one. I have to decide that on my own.

Its not a plan B letter but im not sure if I want to do that yet. Not sure if I want to head down that path.

All I know is I want some time to measure in my head how I want to proceed. I dont want her coming how to flop on my couch. I want her away. She will probably run to her OM. Not a big deal since im sure she has been all the while.

All I know is I ran the best PA that I could. I gave it all I could. I cant push a rope though. She has put 0 effort into this M for so long its pathetic. I will not settle for table scraps.

Good for you. Be strong now. You deserve better than this. And it does get easier.

OK, this is your mother speaking. Well, old enough to BE your mother. Good enough! Stop beating on yourself. Would you really have felt any better if she'd waited until after your big day to tell you? Personally, to me that would feel like adding insult to injury.


Health insurance, I can see, but unless the car is in your name, the responsibility and the liability are hers. No phone...not unless you want to pay for it all. Because I'm telling you, if you pay upfront and expect to be reimbursed by a woman with no job and no sense of responsibility, I think you're just setting yourself up for my aggravation and hurt. Unless you're a masochist, I don't think you should do it.


If you have it in you to be ironic, you could always do the envelope of your Plan B letter in calligraphy anyway. I don't remember ever hearing of anyone else ever doing that here before.

Buckle up. It's going to be a bumpy ride.

tl

Hee Hee.....I love this idea.

He could also sign his name, and write her name in the salutation, with calligraphy. If it happened to me I'd blow a mini-gasket trying to reconcile the writing style with the message in the letter. I'm sorry you're at this point, Yeg, but it still amuses me to think Plan B letter/calligraphy.

tl

First of all the note itself was in print. The front of the envelope was indeed in my very bad calligraphy. So +1 for the BS.

First full day in Plan B has gone pretty well. Got a call into FIL to arrange for her to swap the car insurance to her name and tell her to split her cell off of my line. Im sure he is going to tell me she really isnt sure about leaving. My WW is a coward so she isnt going to admit it to her parents. Only reason she confessed to him about the A is because I forced her too. She also needs to come up with a date to get her stuff out of the house. That way I can change the locks.

Im going to make a appointment with the OMs command to update them on the continued contact of the OM with my WW. Gonna push the issue to IG office as well. Their may be no contact but who cares. I dont want her using him as a bank account for a custody battle in court. Also dont want DD5 living with them. That makes me sick.

I dont know why i was reluctant to go to PB before. I really feel alot better. Its very impowering. Their is no walking around on eggshells. There is no worry about "settling". There are just clearly defined conditions that she will have to abide if she wants to come back.

FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER I FEEL IM DRIVING THE TRAIN.

At this point im really looking forward to the D process almost. Its exciting because either way im getting a new life. I will be able to date someone who loves me and wants to invest in the relationship.

My WW may reach an epiphany and want to be that person. I doubt that since im going to make it really hard for her to step back into the house again now thats she is gone. She simply is a renter. She will do the minimum to get by and she is very selfish. She cares only for her happiness. She doesnt give a poop about MY HAPPINESS or DD5s happiness. There is just ME ME ME ME. Its all about ME.

On the other hand its exciting to think that one day i will be free to date other people. I will have a chance to find someone that really cares about me. I wont have to look down when a pretty girl walks by. Instead I can pursue a healthy relationship with someone that is willing to put WE before ME. I feel now that I learned all about meeting needs empowered to woo the ladies. I know how to attract them. I know the qualities I want in a person. I know how affairs start. I can use that knowledge with single eligible females to start a new relationship.

Honestly Im almost giddy. There is no worrying about the WW really. I dont concern myself about where she is. If she goes to OMs house ill document it for the court case but that is it. Im documenting everything. I have my calender that I sum up all the activities ive been doing with DD5. All the purchases ive made. That way I can show im the quality father she needs for custodial decisions.

There is no real worrying about how the WW is going to interpret legal moves I make. Who cares if she gets a lawyer. I ain't skared. They cant weave poo into gold thread. He cant hide the truth that WW is greedy and has no way to support DD5. She still hasn't worked more than 20 hours in the last 2 months. She has no money and will probably try to pursue the OM just for a soft pillow to land on. She needs the $$$.All the more reason why i cant let her get custody.

Thanks for all the support the last few days. I really feel alot better.

BTW all im changing the name of the thread. I want something to reflect the more positive evnts in my life.

YEG...I am so, so sorry. you were really good to her, and she never gave you a chance.

you seem more sad than angry. so we'll be furious on your behalf. unexpressed sadness when there's no shoulder to cry on...that'll wear you down and break you. a little righteous anger, unexpressed, will put a touch of fire in your eyes, give you energy, and allow you to focus on the REST of your life.

when you're pissed and trying to be nice, you come across as crisp and self-sufficient.
when you're sad and trying to be nice, you come across as weary.
RIGHTEOUS is your word of the day.

short term: take DD5 to the zoo and get some ice-cream or something. don't go out of your way to invite Ice Princess along unless she asks to come along. longterm: get the IP out of your house. she's wearing you down.

stay strong, YEG. sorry no Pollyanna today.

p.s. Read "The Art of Seduction." it's not as naughty as it sounds, it's a good practical compendium about personality traits and "types" other people respond to. good sales/pop psych tool; on my shelf next to "Art of War." it'll remind you what you've got going for you, whether IP (Ice Princess) bounces back or not. Ask the other BHs about it.

DD5 and I are going to take a nap then go to a walking trail together. She has been wanting to do that for a while now.

WW is gone. She is at her parents for good. I already told her to come up with a time to get her things so she can GTFO. I was very nice about it but firm. Im doing all communication through my FIL now.

I really do feel alot better today. I was better within 2 hrs last night. When i found out I was a mess for weeks. PB really is easier.

You beat me to the punch, dude! way to be righteous!! =0) whoa, that was meant to be a smily-face, but i like this guy better:

=0)

Change the locks?

hmmm? i actually skimmed over that part w/out really registering it. i don't know if there's a legality issue w/ that in whatever state they're in, i've never been in that situation. is there an attorney in the house?

Change the locks.
Anyway.
She will not call the police.

Im going to wait till she gets her stuff. Thats in indication that she is voluntarily moving out. Since that what she wants so she can "find her happiness" she is going to do it.

Ill consult with my lawyer first though. Dont want to misstep.

The big deal is I dont wanna get home from work and find her kicking her feet up watching TV from the comfort of my house. She can find her happiness where she left it in her OM's pants but she isnt going to cake eat anymore.

You take all of what im offering or none. Im NOT a fall back plan. Im NOT settling for crumbs.