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Let him in but expose the affair as I outlined above. Expose it to everyone.
Who is the OW?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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It's 1 am & I'm wide awake
I feel like I'm living someone else's nightmare.
I don't even know this man!
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It's 1 am & I'm wide awake
I feel like I'm living someone else's nightmare.
I don't even know this man! I am so sorry, Ashlee. I know it will hard to sleep, but please try and get some sleep and then come back tomorrow. I would let your H come back home and stop fighting with him. It is real easy to make strategic mistakes when you are this upset. We can help you with this...
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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I'm almost sure sh'e a work associate.
He has been 'mentoring' her for around 14 years, from Clerk to International Director.
He says 'It's not true'
I'm irrational & looking to make this ugly because I sent a text to his bosses. I'm the one who looks like a fool, because I have no proof.
I said I didn;'t need to prove anything. I have the taped conversation - I KNOW he's having an affair
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I'm almost sure sh'e a work associate.
He has been 'mentoring' her for around 14 years, from Clerk to International Director.
He says 'It's not true' Is she married?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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You are right
Thanks for the kick 'up the proverbial!'
I'll stay logged on, but I'll go upstairs & try & read 'or something', so that I can pick up any words of wisdom in a little while.
You are ALL amazing people
Thank you
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Yes, she's married, but no children
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Yes, she's married, but no children Do you have her husbands phone #? I would get his number and call him FIRST THING in the morning. Make a list of exposure targets that include your parents, his parents, close friends and family and HER PARENTS. Call them all up and tell them you want to save your marriage and ask them to use their influence to persuade your H to end his affair. Ask her parents to use their influence to persuade their skankyho daughter to end her affair with your married husband. Don't warn your husband you are going to do this. Just do it. When you are done, let him in. Don't fight, don't yell and don't allow him to bait you into a fight. Demand of him that he end ALL contact with the OW NOW. That means they no longer work together either.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Do you have her parent's contact information? Does she have a facebook account?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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If it's the OW I think it is, I know her hubby, but not his telephone number. I am 80% sure its 'her', & I can prove it from cell phone logs, if I can get them (which right now is difficult).
I really don't want to go there, until I have 100%
I have No idea about her family
Yes she does have a facebook account.
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This whole thing is going from Bad to WORSE!
Hubby called this morning to tell me he was coming back here & I must open the gate.
On the phone he said that because of what I had done (locking him out & moving the rest of his clothes across to the cottage) what I had, he's now going to make this very ugly.
He's going to 'Take me for everything & kick me out the house' When I had the VAR going I asked him again what he intended to do. This time he answered 'You'll have to wait & see'
He also said that he wouldn't have needed to go 'elsewhere' if I had made it more pleasant for him at home & for the last 10 YEARS it's been like this. - That there's nothing for him to come home to!
I've told both my boys & my eldest son said'THAT WILL NEVER HAPPEN'. If he does that, both of them will disown him as a Father.
I am definetly in a nightmare
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Ashlee...change your subject line if you can to something more urgent. "Being threatened - please help" or something like that.
Sooly
"Stop yappin and make it happen." "The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you."
Me 47 DH 46 Together for 28 years. Married 21 years.
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Hi Sooly
Sorry I have to ask - But HOW do I do that?
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Not completely sure, but see if you can click edit to your original first post here and see if a window to type text will pop up. There may be a subject line window above it that you can possibly change.
It may be too late. There is a window of opportunity to change these things, and then it is closed.
Sooly
"Stop yappin and make it happen." "The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you."
Me 47 DH 46 Together for 28 years. Married 21 years.
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Hi - I've changed my Display Name to:
Ashbe
Just as a precaution
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Okay. I will edit my recent post to reflect that.
I do have to go for several hours. Here's hoping someone will tap into your thread. Hang in there!!! Stay strong.
Sooly
"Stop yappin and make it happen." "The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you."
Me 47 DH 46 Together for 28 years. Married 21 years.
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It looks like the only way to change the Topic Line is to Open a New one.
Should I do this?
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Ashlee, let him in and stop fighting with him. Let him in and just TELL HIM [don't ask] that you know he is having an affair with [insert name]. Get his admission that it is her. Ask him - politely - to end his affair today.
He will probably blame you and say all manner of fobbabble, blah, blah, blah. Pay no attention to his rantings but insist that he end his affair.
Don't fight with him and don't allow him to drag you into a fight.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Give it a while. That's usually not recommended. I opened a post to draw people to your thread. Hopefully it will work.
Sooly
"Stop yappin and make it happen." "The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you."
Me 47 DH 46 Together for 28 years. Married 21 years.
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Ash, are you snooping on his phone records to confirm the ID of the OW?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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