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Pep dear! Thank you. Tough love is definitely needed. Since you've dealt with this up close and personal with your son, I could really use your help. If you would be willing, could you contact the mods and get my email addy? Since Kasey knows I'm on the short track to change, he's probably going to be looking for ways to pull me back in without sincere real change this time. He has no idea how close to done I am.
And the thing is, when he reads something like this thread, he turns it back on me and tells me I have no idea how close to done he is. Sorry - I am so sick of this deflecting instead of sincere contemplation. I crave Godly Sorrow right now. I notified mods to give you my addy.
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We spent 3 hours first thing this a.m. together and it was a spiritual focus. I want to spend more time recreating together - he and I have both been painfully overweight and we're right now following an extremely strict diet so that our feet aren't killing us, and that we don't damage our knees doing what we love to do.
We're talking about love bank deposits so he does buy into that part of the Harley program. Funny how he was the one to bring it to us.
I think the best thing we could do is POJA excluding the language of the 12 step program from our vocabulary at this point, because that's his bully pulpit for shutting me up. And he's no where near recovery but as I say that I know the 12 step retort is take your own inventory. The problem is that I have to live with his and the consequences of it.
Cafe Plan B link http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2182650&page=1 The ? that made recovery possible: "Which lovebuster do I do the most that hurts the worst"? The statement that signaled my personal recovery and the turning point in our marriage recovery: "I don't need to be married that badly!" If you're interested in saving your relationship, you'll work on it when it's convenient. If you're committed, you'll accept no excuses.
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Cafe Plan B link http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2182650&page=1 The ? that made recovery possible: "Which lovebuster do I do the most that hurts the worst"? The statement that signaled my personal recovery and the turning point in our marriage recovery: "I don't need to be married that badly!" If you're interested in saving your relationship, you'll work on it when it's convenient. If you're committed, you'll accept no excuses.
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Kayla:
Jsut wanted you to know that I hope you get this thing going in the right direction...
(((KA)))
LG
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Kasey has a job!
He started a temp job on Monday and that afternoon about 1 hour before he finished another employer called him that he had interviewed with several times four months ago and asked if he could come into work "right now". So he went from one job that was 1/6th what he could make from doing massage therapy - but it was work that was going to at least last for 2 weeks, to one that paid 1/4th what he could make doing massage therapy - but was going to last as long as he could handle the job.
Since massage therapy work wasn't steady, this was the best choice he could make and he made it.
It's been a struggle for him to deal with the physicality of the job, and for a while yesterday a.m. I thought he was going to slide right into depression, but yesterday afternoon snapped out of it.
When I started this thread, I asked that he have at least 2k coming in per month by the end of August and he promised he would.
I haven't seen any signs of porn use in Kasey's behavior.
Son is at college now. He has two apartment-mates that are playing video games and cussing all the time. Son just shuts his door and does his homework and works on his little business, or locks his computer in a drawer and goes and makes new friends. He seems to be adjusting well.
Now if I could just get my mojo back and make some sales on my job. **** recession!!
Cafe Plan B link http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2182650&page=1 The ? that made recovery possible: "Which lovebuster do I do the most that hurts the worst"? The statement that signaled my personal recovery and the turning point in our marriage recovery: "I don't need to be married that badly!" If you're interested in saving your relationship, you'll work on it when it's convenient. If you're committed, you'll accept no excuses.
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Aww, Pep, you beat me to it!  for the good news, KA!
Me - 30 (FWW)
H - 30 (BH)
DSx2
D-day: 2008
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"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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I <3 you, Kayla! Sorry it's been tough on you all. Flare prayers sent up.
I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten. My Story Recovered!
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