I may be venting a bit here......recieved text from wife....she said it was urgent and that she referred our DS(10yrs) to school counselor. For those of you who don't know my WW teaches in the same building my son goes to school in. So I answer my phone....my WW tells me my DS is telling her he wishes he was dead. WW tells me this is not the first time he has said it. I am so angry right now. I blame her for this! Am I wrong? My son told me on monday that the OM stopped at the house and the WW repeatedly ask my son to go over his house with her which my son refused. Does this have anything to do with his behavior? He has not acted out this way with me.

You need to talk to your WW and explain to her that what she is doing is making him feel this way and that you do not want OM around your son!

I have! Told him also. Its the fog she dont see nothing wrong with it. Considering she is an elementary teacher who used to tell me about how sad these very situations are that she saw I can not fathom how she does not understand!

Then YOUR son needs to talk to his mother and express his feelings on what she is doing to him. It would be a bigger impact for your WW if she hears it from her son

Agree on letting your son be the one to bear the message. It will have a stronger impact on her.

But you must aggressively confront your son on his comments. I say that as a man who was so depressed once that I too wanted to die.

Aggressive confrontation of this is called for. You must pull your son aside and tell him how important he is to you, how hurt you would be if he were to do anything, and don't hesitate to put him in the hospital if necessary.

I'm dead serious on this. Suicidal comments aren't to be taken lightly.

Yes, your WW is most at fault here, but you will be too if you don't aggressively approach your son on this. It is ok to tell him that suicide is a cowards way out of problems. Every problem is temporary.

Tell him that you need him in your life.

Feeling needed is very important and don't underestimate the power of guilt in stopping a suicide.

But this is not something to take lightly or to tap dance around. It calls for aggressive intervention.

DCN,

my WW tells me my DS is telling her he wishes he was dead .....WW repeatedly ask my son to go over his house with her which my son refuses.

OMG, there are no words, not only is your W brain dead, how can the OM even do this. Please document everything so you can get full custody. Have you fully exposed your W?

God Bless
Gamma

Yes I have. She is still sticking to the "we are good friends" story. Her immediate family supports her. they have all done the same stuff. His family is still in sympathy mode since he lost his wife 7 months ago. The OM cheated on his dying wife so we know what moral character he has, which is why I don't want my children around him. We go to our first court ordered co-parenting session with the counslor tonight. This should be an interesting session.