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Should I really push the severance or just get her out of there...
It is a suffering we must all bear. Strong efforts to prevent it from happening again. The opposite of covering up is uncovering or disclosing - The Pope
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Should I really push the severance or just get her out of there... BOTH!
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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He needs to hire a lawyer to a) protect himself because he has been threatened and b) to tell him and his wife what her legal options are about getting out of there with a package. The lawyer can give him options that he can take back to her. THG can use this intel to persuade his wife to get out of there. Then the atty can negotiate a nice fat severance package for WW. Yes, and he can also try to convince his W to go with him to "just listen" to what the attorney has to say. This may make her wheels start spinning ... to begin to see more clearly how the OM/CEO(?) has been playing her, just like his daddy/company owner and the corporate attorneys.
FBW in recovery
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Yes, this is a small business, but it does have a Board of Directors... Convienence Store(s). How many stores?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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THG, I really think you need to call the OMW and compare notes. I smell some great opportunities there. She can be your GREATEST ALLY in all this. I would call her and compare notes and exchange email addresses. That way you keep in touch until the affairees are separated.
She also needs to know that this is hopeless unless your W leaves that job. Some pressure from her end would be helpful.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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This place is awesome, thank you for the support and guidance... Is this heaven... nope Iowa IOWA! Whatchoo talkin' 'bout, Willis? This is OHIO! LOL No, I got the movie line.  Okay, back to business...
D-Day 2-10-2009
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My WW told me yesterday that I need to stop contacting them and let them reconcile. So when I contact her again, it will light the fuse all over again. I will be the bad guy and she will blame me for breaking us up. I couldn't just leave it alone. She's bullying you. You, my friend, are helping them reconcile by helping to remove the third party (WW)from their marriage.
D-Day 2-10-2009
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Yes, this is a small business, but it does have a Board of Directors... Convienence Store(s). How many stores? Is their anyone other than OM's father and his employees who has a financial stake in the health of this company?
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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It just dawned on me that my WW probably signed a document yesterday that she did not tell me about.
It is a suffering we must all bear. Strong efforts to prevent it from happening again. The opposite of covering up is uncovering or disclosing - The Pope
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Wisconsin, actually. You have to have some fun when going through hell.
It is a suffering we must all bear. Strong efforts to prevent it from happening again. The opposite of covering up is uncovering or disclosing - The Pope
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I would guess the board of directors. The company barely survived an embezzlement scandal a few years ago. That is when the son (affair partner) took over on a daily basis.
It is a suffering we must all bear. Strong efforts to prevent it from happening again. The opposite of covering up is uncovering or disclosing - The Pope
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It just dawned on me that my WW probably signed a document yesterday that she did not tell me about. Don't worry about this. That's a simple matter. A good attorney can rip that to shreds (coercion and lack of legal representation.)
D-Day 2-10-2009
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Another issue is that after meeting with the lawyers yesterday and seeing the email that I sent 'exposing' the affair to all siblings and parents my WW is mad as hell, doesn't see home or family as the safe haven and actually sees work as the 'only' safe place.
In her fogged mind I am the bad guy trying to make her loose her job and her affair partner must be the hero, who saved the day.
It is a suffering we must all bear. Strong efforts to prevent it from happening again. The opposite of covering up is uncovering or disclosing - The Pope
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It is a suffering we must all bear. Strong efforts to prevent it from happening again. The opposite of covering up is uncovering or disclosing - The Pope
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THG,
Turn up the heat on OM, suggest to OMW that she gets a polygraph for him, to dislodge any past infidelities. Suggest that you are going for a lawsuit independent of your W for damages your have suffered.
Possibly suggest your will contact their customers and competitors.
God Bless
Gamma
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I would guess the board of directors. The company barely survived an embezzlement scandal a few years ago. That is when the son (affair partner) took over on a daily basis. OoooKay. Now we're getting somewhere. What you probably have right now is a company whose owners are gritting their teeth and are ready to kick OM's [censored] for opening them up to this liability. They are sitting on a powder keg and they know it. I would definitely suggest that you get an attorney and get some legal advice on this. Just the hint that you've lawyered up may change their game plan entirely.
D-Day 2-10-2009
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Another issue is that after meeting with the lawyers yesterday and seeing the email that I sent 'exposing' the affair to all siblings and parents my WW is mad as hell, doesn't see home or family as the safe haven and actually sees work as the 'only' safe place.
In her fogged mind I am the bad guy trying to make her loose her job and her affair partner must be the hero, who saved the day. Don't let any of this bother you for a second. This is just foggy thinking. She is high on the addiction of her affair so it is your job to blow apart that fantasy by getting her out of there. Blow up the fog by bringing in reality!
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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[quote]She's bullying you. You, my friend, are helping them reconcile by helping to remove the third party (WW)from their marriage. remove the third party ww from who's marriage?
It is a suffering we must all bear. Strong efforts to prevent it from happening again. The opposite of covering up is uncovering or disclosing - The Pope
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Don't let any of this bother you for a second. This is just foggy thinking. She is high on the addiction of her affair so it is your job to blow apart that fantasy by getting her out of there. Blow up the fog by bringing in reality! Cue MelodyLane's fog horn.
D-Day 2-10-2009
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Thank you Marriage Builders!
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THG, do you live in a fault state? [fault vs no fault divorce] What state are you in?
I have some ideas about how to feed some information to the OMW that she can pass onto her H.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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