Yes I seen the paperwork with my on eyes. That when she used to tell me her man problems. One thing I never did was tell the girl anything about my marriage. The fact she was a young girl and she was coming to me for advice. Her dad told me her mother never wanted her. She is a product of her dad own affair with a woman in his workplace. She has all sisters. Her oldest sister has such resentment for her. I actually felt sorry for this girl and tried to be there for her. I made sure she got her kids to Doctor's Appt. I let her use my car for her kids. We would take her ad the kids out to eat, to the park trying to be good godparents. She had the nerve to to tell me she felt like we were her mom and dad. Do you guys see how close I was to this girl

Several people know and they came to me stating that her boyfriend was spreading false rumors about them. She always plays the victim crying saying its not true. Her boyfriend left her saying he cant trust her. He called me to say how sorry he was but he knew for awhile something was going on but didnt want to be the cause of breaking up my marriage. My son-n-law saw them at Wendy's and he told me they were so nervous. I have been silent about it lately so they dont know what to make of me or what I am thinking at this moment. My husband told me last night that I look so sad and had a disqusted look on my face. I just walk out of the room. I have so much to say but this is so hard. He cheated on me with someone we knew since the age of 12 He is over 30 years older than this child. I mean who knows anything at 21---legally we are grown but mentally we are not. My heart hurts so bad right now

Thank you so much. I am hurting so bad right now. He just left saying he was going out for a drink with some friends I was outside talking to him and the young girl rides by in her car (she lives down the street from us) I look at him like u are so busted. He has been calling the house phone to make sure I am still home. I am not answering it so he text my cell asking where r u? I didnt text him back I dont have time for his nonsense. I am so sick of this mess. I know I need to be calm but its so hard right now

Let me tell you how much my husband is denying this affair. I take care of all the bills. Credit card bill for a Hotel rm $271.00 His excuse was he had too much to drink while at the Casino. The casino is a 30 min drive from our house and I could have picked him up. We go to the same Dr. but he chose to go to Urgent Care during working hours Lab bill came to the house He was treated for a STD I questioned him and told me that they just tested him for that (it is a lie) She left a letter on his truck and of course I read it It was so childest with flowers and hearts on it. Called him on that and he was like she has a crush and its all n her mind. My grandson saw them n the park and he told me she needed a ride to work one morning but she couldn't come to the house. I told you guys I have so much to tell. He is denying it over and over again. Saying her dad dont need to know about this. He is a Hot Mess right now

Oh yes, because we know her dad wouldn't be thrilled.

Did you tell her dad? Quickest way to end this. Tell her dad.

vivi;
You are at an importanat crossroad in your M right now. How you act is really going to be crutial.

You must tell everyone. With kindness. Not with bitterness and revenge on your mind. Can you do that? This is only going to end by being drug out into the light.

I am sorry for the children of this fool, but you are going to have to cut all contact. But first expose. To everyone who will listen.

With the STD, photos, letter and hotel bills, you have enough to assume an affair is going on.

Did YOU get tested for an STD?

If not, do so today.

Vivi,
So much is pointing towards an affair. If you can afford it you may want to contact a PI. When the girl is out I would go speak to the father and tell him what you know. As sad as it is you need to cut this girl and her children out of your life. I know it is hard and unfair. As others have pointed out you need to do this matter of factly and unemotional. No contact after it has been done. From your posts, it sounds like the woman likes to play professional victim (woe is me). Don't get pulled into her drama.

Next time your husband wants to go out why don't you cheerfully say great lets go. Not only do you ruin his plans but you get some alone time.

I got tested with the quickness. I didnt have anything thank god. I guess he had enough sense not to touch me during that time

Our daughter said the same thing you said about invited myself to go with my WH. She has talked to her father (she is 38) and of course is your mom thinks I am sleeping with this young girl and its not true. Our daughter and her husband just moved out here a year ago. Our son-n-law has seen them at Wendy's during lunch hours. They are so upset over this.

You guys are right I need NC with the kids. I love those babies so much. I am still taking care of the kids right now because no else not even her own mother will take care of the kids. Her dad whom she lives with wathches them n the morning I get them at 1:15 and drop them off at 6:15/6:30. I really dont have any contact with her But if I go outside and my husband is out there there she is talking and her eyes get big when she sees me

Vivi,
The kids are not your responsibility. It's not your problem if noone will watch them. This is her problem only. Remove yourself and your family from their lives.

What she does with her kids is none of your concern. By no longer allowing them around, you will make it a little bit less easy for the affairees to have excuses to see each other. They'll still get together, but they'll have to work harder at it.

It also sends a very clear message that THIS IS NOT OK WITH YOU!

You are telling them it's ok for this despicable behavior to continue by watching the kids. It's doormat 101. You are better than this vivi! She will figure out something for her kids fast, you simply haven't given her the need to.

Just say

"Effective immediately, I will not be watching your children." and don't.

If you need to say goodbye to the child tell her "I won't be watching you anymore. Your Mommy will find someone to do that. You are a delightful child.I am sorry I didn't know in advance so I could prepare you. Bye honey." Kiss her and be done.


BTW.....daycares ( and that is virtually what you are here) have to do this all the time, say goodbye to kids without warning (due to parents moving without having planned it, to immediate termination for other things).

It isn't ideal for children but her Mother will have to tend to that.

vivi,


Keeping her children results in the continued poisoning of your marriage.


Don't drink the poison. Every day that you stay in any type of contact with the OW is a day that you spend damaging yourself and your marriage.


Stop the insanity. Cut her out of your life.


SB

I Know u guys are right about the kids. I went to the Doctor today and I have lost 12 pds in 1 week. I am a size 7 and my clothes are so baggie now. I know is due to stress. Last night we were having dinner and she knocks on the door with her kids with her and my WH tells me oh I told her to come get something eat. Daughter came in the family room to talk to us and the whole this young girl was twisting her hair, biting her nails. I just stared at her. She got up and left with her kids. Later n the evening my WH tells me the young girl tells him that she felt so uncomfortable around our daughter and that my daughter was giving her dirty looks. He then tells me that I can believe you are treating her so nasty (he is still denying the affair) Talking about this girl thinks highly of u. I told him that is a load of mess. I am so tired of this mess. Certain people in her family are starting to speak out about this. Her oldest sister boyfriend saw them at a store parking lot and My WH slapped her butt and gave her some money. What is wrong with this man. Yes its time for me to stand up to this mess and work on myself.

vivi,

Start taking action, you will feel so much better about yourself. Defend yourself and your marriage in a dignified, firm way following the MB plans and I am certain you will feel better about everything and be wonderful role model for your children.

I will start taking action. I can't sleep or eat. This situationis taking a tol on me. Just this morning before he left for work he told me her boyfriend who works for him went to my WH boss stating he was being pick on by him and he would like to go to another department. He also told the boss that my WH is sleeping with his girlfriend. My husband was called n the office by his boss asking him if this was true. Of course he said no and the young girl has been part of our family since she was 12. He is starting to believe his own lies now. He looked me n the eyes saying I didnt doing anything with that girl. He knows this looks so skanky and he will never tell the truth about it. When you show him everything you have on him he has a explanation for it. This man has no shame right now

Her boyfriend is n another department now. Also he has left her.