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Joined: Nov 2009
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More than likely OM is feeling the noose tightening. Now that your WW is about to become "free," that means OM has to step up to the plate and be responsible.

Nothing drives a stake into an affair faster than having to make it legitimate.


Preach the Gospel every day. When necessary, use words.
St. Francis of Assissi
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Originally Posted by lostman101
She got dumped by OM last night.

HA HA! Most guys of his caliber probably don't want a lot of drama in their girlfriends.

Try to fight the urge to send her a congratulatory bouquet of roses.



Me (BH)
FWW
Married 2000, DS 8, DD 6, DD 2

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lol. it was nice to see her hurt.


Me 37
WW 37
Married 14 years
4 boys 10,8,6,3
exposure Day 2/18/11
A started 11/2010
Divorced 7/21/2011
Has it been a year already??
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 2,888
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Originally Posted by lostman101
lol. it was nice to see her hurt.
While I don't share your glee, I have to say that the breakup was not unexpected.

The A my WxW had was done before the divorce papers were signed.

When I saw her on Memorial Day, she had her son in tow and no OM in sight.

Given a comment I heard from a "mutual friend," she feels no regret, no remorse and no shame.

Truly a work of art. (?)


Preach the Gospel every day. When necessary, use words.
St. Francis of Assissi
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Ya thats sounds like my potential X. Time will tell. Im staying strong and on my course now.


Me 37
WW 37
Married 14 years
4 boys 10,8,6,3
exposure Day 2/18/11
A started 11/2010
Divorced 7/21/2011
Has it been a year already??
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 651
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Originally Posted by Fred_in_VA
The A my WxW had was done before the divorce papers were signed.

I think that's pretty common. My WXH's affair ended before our divorce, too. He even sent me a text telling me that he was single again after they broke up. crazy Since we were still married and had been for over 26 years at the time, I thought he was somewhat delusional.


Me: BS 51
Himself: WH 53, EA/PA w/ RunnerSlut his "running buddy."
Buncha' kids. The two youngest are still minors.
Separated: 08/13/09 after 25 years of marriage
Plan D: Filed 11/13/09 Final 3/30/11
MC told me that he probably has a personality disorder
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Quote
My WXH's affair ended before our divorce, too. He even sent me a text telling me that he was single again after they broke up. Since we were still married and had been for over 26 years at the time, I thought he was somewhat delusional.


Lol Kirby!

Today my stbx told me that "he was divorced in his heart", and doesn't feel any guilt about his sexual affair. Whatever.

LM...my condolences to your wife's next victim. Hang in there man.


D-yr fall 06-fall 07
Separated 10/2010
Him-several affairs, last one 3/2011
Divorced filed 3/2011, final 3/2012

Formerly "Mopey".
http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2013149&page=1

After a 4 yr FR, it became CLEAR to me of what you can look for in a FR. And that is the absence of POJA, and/or if your spouse tramples on your boundaries. If someone is not willing to do POJA with you, and they don't respect your boundaries, imo, the relationship is doomed.
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Thanks. I tried talking to her face to face last night. I asked her to go to counseling and she said she would think about it. I said oh, i know what that means. She said " i dont want to go." Okay then. She had to leave her sons baseball game early and where did she end up? OM house.


Me 37
WW 37
Married 14 years
4 boys 10,8,6,3
exposure Day 2/18/11
A started 11/2010
Divorced 7/21/2011
Has it been a year already??
Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 393
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Well here is what im going to do. I have a plan. Its called Divorce. She is done burning my bridges. I said i was on the fence and could see both sides. Well this ploy about her being dumped was all a show just so i would be nicer to her and get divorce over with in a nicer fashion. I was optimistic, she put on a good show, but i suspected this the whole time. I even called her out on it several times. She told me today after i knew she spent the night there again. That is also why i wouldnt back off of no contact letters or anything else.


Me 37
WW 37
Married 14 years
4 boys 10,8,6,3
exposure Day 2/18/11
A started 11/2010
Divorced 7/21/2011
Has it been a year already??
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 176
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BRAVO lost!!!! BRAVO!!!!

Mean nasty little creatures waytards are, aren't they?

I want to share this song with you, even though you may not be into the Foo Fighters. This album has played nonstop wherever I am, since it came out.



BH (me): 31                  WXW: 31 (Still in the house!)
Married: Jan 2005         DS: 6 years old
DDay #1: 12 Mar 2008    Failed Recovery #1: Jun 2008 - Jun 2010
DDay #2: 28 Jun 2010     Failed Recovery #2: Aug 2010 - Sep 2010
Plan A/Limbo: Sep 2010 - 24 Jan 2011
DDay #3: 29 Jan 2011
On OM#4, that I know of...
D Filed: 11 Feb 2011
D Final: 10 Jun 2011 (still waiting on prop division & custody)

"You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink."
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Yes they are nasty. Its funny how they seem so justified in their own little worlds. I think Divorce will be okay, i mean its not like this WW woman is anyone i ever knew. Its a new creature and i dont like her anymore. One day she will figure life back out and see how bad she has messed up. I think her and her OM just feed on each other making their own perfect little fantasy world lol.


Me 37
WW 37
Married 14 years
4 boys 10,8,6,3
exposure Day 2/18/11
A started 11/2010
Divorced 7/21/2011
Has it been a year already??
Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 393
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I went and signed the final copies of the paper work last night so just waiting this out now.


Me 37
WW 37
Married 14 years
4 boys 10,8,6,3
exposure Day 2/18/11
A started 11/2010
Divorced 7/21/2011
Has it been a year already??
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 1,719
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Lost - First time posting in this forum and I don't know what to say to you. The only thing that comes to mind is to take care of the kids and yourself. Don't look back now - look forward. If your WW has a change of heart, then she can chase you down. Then, you'd have a decision to make, but not before then.



BS(me)- 45
WW - 41
D-day 1 - (PA) 01/2011
DS - 6
Exposure: early 02/2011
Started Plan B - 7/11
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Ya you are right Andy. I hope and pray it all works out for you and try to keep yourself from ending up in this section. I know you have tried hard and its a hard road, but keep your chin up.


Me 37
WW 37
Married 14 years
4 boys 10,8,6,3
exposure Day 2/18/11
A started 11/2010
Divorced 7/21/2011
Has it been a year already??
Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 393
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Well court is tomorrow. Nothing has made a difference in my WW's ways of life. She is still 100% committed to have life her way. Wish me luck! Everything should be spelled out on paper. just have to go before a judge tomorrow and make it final.


Me 37
WW 37
Married 14 years
4 boys 10,8,6,3
exposure Day 2/18/11
A started 11/2010
Divorced 7/21/2011
Has it been a year already??
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 6,352
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Ugghhhh! I'm assuming that it is mandatory that you attend in person?

Be strong, LM, it's almost over.

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i dont have to be there. but i feel that i should to make sure nothing changes on me. im at a loss for words over the matter.


Me 37
WW 37
Married 14 years
4 boys 10,8,6,3
exposure Day 2/18/11
A started 11/2010
Divorced 7/21/2011
Has it been a year already??
Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 393
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i cant do it. I cant go to court. Im gonna make her end it on her own. I spoke with the lawyer and he said everything is signed and nothing will change. I think i will spare myself the extra heart ache.


Me 37
WW 37
Married 14 years
4 boys 10,8,6,3
exposure Day 2/18/11
A started 11/2010
Divorced 7/21/2011
Has it been a year already??
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,708
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I agree that if you don't need to go.....let her end it alone.
She made all the choices that led to the moment.

Be thinking of you.........strength............







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Thinking of you Lostman.

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