I agree....to show I was unstable or something.

The OM is also in the military and is being brought up on adultery charges so they are investigating his relationship with my WW and what government assets they used to communicate with each other.

It's been confirmed. WW has another prepaid phone. DS11 saw it fall out of her pocket. He says he's going to try to take it again, but I told him she will know one of them took it.

Of course she has one.

Goodness. Poor DS11. Gotta love the little guy.

You have the best little boy, GJM.

GJM,

Sorry to hear the latest. Melody is correct, she is very manipulative. Gives you a crumb to throw you off course, which it did initially but after coming back here others advised exactly what it was.

Your doing great and getting great advise, keep it up!

ba

I do have great kids. DS11 has been very helpful, but I am concerned how this is all going to affect him later. I don't ask him to do anything, but I am proud of him. WW is manipulative, but not very smart about it. She was telling me that she was going to spend 70 on DS11s tux and I told her we didn't have the money for anything. She asked me what my suggestion was and I said for her to commit to a program of recovery and move back home because the kids need us and we need each other.

I'd suggest not mentioning things like "recovery" to her at this point, unless she brings the subject up. Active WWs are not open to that kind of talk, she will see your attempts as controlling and manipulative, and why would you want a lying manipulative, deceitful and scheming WW back in your home anyway? When the fog clears and she's open to recovering the M, that's the time to bring the issue up.

He could always borrow the phone and "accidentally" drop it in the toilet (evil grin)...

Will this crap ever end? Geez!

I really think kids appreciate knowing what is going on so they can protect themselves and their family. This kid sounds like my nephew who is so smart and resourceful. My nephew is only six and he told me to lock up my house and not let 'uncle softlad' in until he said he was sorry for upsetting me! A natural Plan Ber.

Out of the mouth of babes...

Indie, this actually made me chuckle, but only for a moment. Then it brought a tear to my eye when I thought about the awareness that kids have when it comes to wrong doing. The completely selfish nature of the wayward mind is truly mind boggling. How these aliens cannot see the broad, life altering results of their horrendous actions is sometimes just too much to comprehend sometimes.

It's been 8 years since my crash and burn and I'm still feeling the effects of it.

You and your kids are doing great, GJM! I'm so sorry you're going through this, but hang tough - I've got a good feeling about your sitch.

You do? I was getting ready to write my plan B letter. This OM won't give up! I get angry thinking about how WW talks about the kids being SO important and she's doing this. People say don't stay together for the kids, but I say stay together for them and us.

Do this right, GJM, and yes, I do have a good feeling about it. Just make sure you do what we advise!

Thanks. I have been following everything I've been told.

Just heard the OMW is filing for D tomorrow. She found out that he was lying and texting WW. Since they will have more opportunity to see each other, I think Plan B is in my best interest. I can still Plan A through Christmas, but maybe I should just go Plan B so that she can see what she's missing. Finding an IM is going to be the hard part. Who am I kidding? This whole thing is hard. I think this could be the perfect time to Plan B, but on the other hand, I'll be without the kids for part of Christmas.

I feel like I've been getting punched in the gut repeatedly. I hope the D news is a good thing. Somebody please say yes....I think now he will have more reason to pursue my W.

I know it's been said a bunch; however, I want to thank you for serving Our country.

You've been a Marine for a long time. You've been trained to face death, deal with pain, persevere through torture, and survive to your last dying death...all while keeping a stone face.

Right now you're dealing with horrible treachery and betrayal. But you need to treat this like you are in the enemys camp. VAR on at all times when you are around here. Record every phone conversation. You cannot afford to show weakness. Do not engage her with anger either. Do not get pulled into a dogfight of anger. You're about to see your wife's claws really come out.

I'm not sure if anyone will agree but I don't see any harm on mentioning that you konw she purchased another cell phone.

Do not be a jerk. Do not get emotionally weak around her either. You wouldn't take this abuse from another man, a friend, a family member, or anyone else. Love blinds and binds us. Do not play her game. You play your game.

Wait for his investigation. How can a man be willing to lose his military career over an affair?

It will get to him. The OM will wake up and realize he threw it all away for nothing. His world is collapsing around him.

Your WW and OM are doomed. This cannot last because he may go to jail or lose his job. Your wife has no money.

Their fantasy hasn't had time to crash yet. Holes are being punched into it, and reality will hit soon. I promise you that!

Keep your finances in line because OM is going to be poor, your wife needs money.

Have you thought about just filing for custody and CS? It may benefit you so she doesn't get custody and you don't pay her CS. She is banking on that from you. She is banking on you giving her CS, and a lot of it. OM will be broke once this is all over. Your WW needs money.