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Joined: Sep 2008
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I do have a question about helping others though. What if you were asked by a female family member for marital coaching or help ... say a cousin or step sister? Would that be inappropriate too? I understand someone not related to you and how dangerous that can be .. but if its family?
MNG
p.s. if i need a 2x4 plz give it!  Does that feel good, MNG?  Can you legally marry your cousin? Can you legally marry your step-sister? If you can have a legitimate sexual relationship and marriage with that person, then you can have an affair with them. There is no taboo to stop your doing so.
BW
Married 1989
His PA 2003-2006
2 kids.
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This does bring up an interesting question. Because of the journey I've been on over the last year and all that I've learned, I have a GREAT desire to want to help others. What good is what I've learned if I cant help others that I know, even if they are women? A married guy at work whose wife is cheating on him started talking about it to me. I told him to go to MB. Then I told him not to discuss the issue with any women (I said the site would explain why!). I told him he could get all the help he needs here, or to get a guy friend to vent to if he didnt like the site. Then I made sure he couldnt discuss the issue with me again. I've also had male friends 'reach out' to me on facebook since I was betrayed. They've been unfriended. Unfortunately scumbags and waywards see FB as a cake shop. Why bother cultivating a real relationship with someone single when you can go trolling for a wounded BS to be the carcass to your vulture? And take your phone number off facebook! That is crazy.
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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Joined: Sep 2007
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I do have a question about helping others though. What if you were asked by a female family member for marital coaching or help ... say a cousin or step sister? Would that be inappropriate too? I understand someone not related to you and how dangerous that can be .. but if its family?
MNG
p.s. if i need a 2x4 plz give it! Does that feel good, MNG? Can you legally marry your cousin? Can you legally marry your step-sister? If you can have a legitimate sexual relationship and marriage with that person, then you can have an affair with them. There is no taboo to stop your doing so. Yeah .. that feels better. I have not gotten ANY 2x4's since i got here .. i was beginning to feel left out! lol. >.< Sometimes you just need a good swift one upside the head. I thought it MIGHT be ok because of morals .. but i guess morals dont always stop the addiction of an affair if it were to go that far. Best safe than sorry. Thanks.  I will leave the step sister and Cousin to my wife.
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Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7
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I do have a question about helping others though. What if you were asked by a female family member for marital coaching or help ... say a cousin or step sister? Would that be inappropriate too? I understand someone not related to you and how dangerous that can be .. but if its family? I think it's different if it's your sister or mother or something like that, as generally speaking that is not an issue. I did hear a call in an old show once where a man was calling in asking for advice for a woman he was helping. Dr. Harley and Joyce finally asked, and it was indeed his sister. They sounded relieved!
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818 Likes: 7
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Oh, I just realized you said step sister and cousin! I agree with SugarCane. You can indeed have a relationship with either, so I would avoid it.
There is a mechanism/concept in psychology explaining why siblings of opposite sexes are not typically attracted to each other. I do not remember the name. The mechanism is usually not present for step-siblings, if I remember right.
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Joined: Oct 2010
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Hello all. Thought I'd let you know that all past girlfriends/love interests have been removed from fb. I didn't actually realize how many I had as friends until I went through the list. Other than the incident a few days ago, I'd never really spoken to the others.
I got on this kick a while back trying to find as many fb "friends" I could. I actually never spend much time on fb. I post some inspirational quotes, read a couple of updates and I'm gone.
But anyway, I also sent the individual that sparked this thread a short letter directing her to some resources including this website. I let her know that I would not be accepting anymore of her calls. Then I unfriended her.
BS - Me 36
WS - wife 34
Married 10 yrs
DDay - Early November 2010
WS filed Divorce 11/9/10
Divorce final 12/22/11
1 Corinthians 13:7: (LOVE) Beareth all things, believeth all things, HOPETH all things, endureth all things.
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Joined: Oct 2009
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Good work Mark.
I also deleted a lot of people from my FB after I found this site and realized what damage can happen with members of the opposite sex and still being married.
I removed friends whom I also knew were adulterer's and haven't repented. That was just for me.
I even removed friends from HS whom I had at one time had a crush on. It had never been recipricated but I didn't want to take the chance.
Good work sir. Glad you have chosen to protect yourself further.
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING  Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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