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Reves, have you been able to go through the articles and info on this site? Score keeping is usually because of sacrifice in marriage and that is BAD BAD BAD for marriage.
You have a long hard road ahead, but by using MB you could have a FANTASTIC marriage.
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING  Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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Joined: Dec 2011
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Thanks again everyone. Yes, I've read the articles and asked my husband to come here. He doesn't want anything to do with this and says he's afraid this site will make me want to leave him. One of the big reasons I'm not here all the time. I agree with all. I'm not going to, nor do I want to do anything that will make him insecure. He doesn't like to run and at times that's all the exercise I can squeeze in. I also agree with keeping score. I'm not a scorekeeper. If I felt I would use his affair as a weapon or an excuse I would just leave. When I wrote "xyz" I meant little quirks that used to be endearing now annoy me. Like, he just had a bad cold and left a graveyard of used tissue on his side of the bed. He did that before and I sent him a picture at work teasing ... You done with these? He teased back ... No I'm saving them. So I took a picture of me wearing nothing but the tissues and said ... I can see why. He came home even before I showed the txt done sending. . Now it just pisses me off. I know I need to work through this but sometimes it's hard.
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Joined: Apr 2001
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Thanks again everyone. Yes, I've read the articles and asked my husband to come here. He doesn't want anything to do with this and says he's afraid this site will make me want to leave him. One of the big reasons I'm not here all the time.. nononono!! Reves, please assure him we are on his side!! We are on the side of your marriage. This website is very pro-marriage and we are all very supportive of your marriage.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Reeves, if he wants to know what happens to WH who come here he can look at me. I came here looking for advice because I wasn't sure what to do. I read the site and posted. I got a good bit of feedback that was a kick in the butt to get me moving towards fixing my marriage, not leaving it. When I posted I thought that I'd get raked over the coals but I didn't. People honestly want to help.
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Uh, no. This site is all about building, maintaining, and repairing marriages. Tell your hubby to get his butt on board with this program. This place is about keeping you two TOGETHER, not tearing you apart.
He won't regret it.
Okay, message to Reves WH: If you don't feel comfortable posting right now, that's fine. But READ the material on this website, and a few threads as well, and you'll see this is one helluva place to land in your situation. You couldn't be in better hands than what this place has to offer. Let me tell you something right now; if I had know this place existed 8 years ago, I wouldn't be without the love of my life and a stepson that I love (to this day) right now. I'm thoroughly convinced of that.
The choice is yours
Every man I meet is in some way my superior; and in that I can learn of him.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Agree with Tiger and all.
Kinda like scoping out a gym and a trainer if you haven't been for years. Sign on, and expect accountability and homework, but the benefits are fabulous!
Reves H, come on in. The water is not warm, but more like the Polar Bear Club! You get a blanket though...
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Joined: Oct 2009
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Reves, if he doesn't want to come on here, would he at least give the online program a chance? He wouldn't have to post on here.
Marital recovery after an affair is quite difficult and it is a narrow path. We wish only the best for you and your marriage.
This is a MARRIAGE BUILDERS website. We want to help build SPECTACULAR marriages.
Give the online course a try. I think it would help you immensely.
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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Reves,
It's been a while since you updated your thread. How are things progressing with your situation?
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