Document the time, date, phone number and the name and office of the "officer" who called you.

Impersonating a police officer is a serious crime.

Hadn't thought about that. Doesn't sound quite right, does it?

K- What state are you in? If you like, I'll do some research for you on this while I'm sitting around watching football (in other words, doing pretty much nothing)

Iowa.
They called and left a message. I called back and actually got the police department with an entire list of extensions so it sounded legit. I talked to the guy and he said let's be adults and not let this get out of control after I asked if it would be illegal to send a message to everyone on her facebook list. He said it depends on what it said.
Why can't I get a no contact against her? Does that mean anyone who tells the truth about someone can have a No contact against them?

yep, just checked - that's their number.
Why is asking for help to stop an affair illegal but having the affair is not?

I think this is awesome! You've totally shattered her affair world! I agree with Mel, you more than accomplished what you set out to do!

CV

An overview of the domestic violence laws and procedures in Iowa is provided on the Iowa Judicial webpage. This article only covers No Contact Orders issued by a court as a result of Domestic Abuse Assault. No Contact Orders can also be issued as a result of a criminal conviction for several crimes, and often have a longer effective period for no contact.

No Contact Orders are entered by the court upon probable cause that Domestic Abuse Assault has been committed (Iowa Code Section 708.2A) or that the Defendant has violated a prior No Contact Order or Consent Agreement (Iowa Code Section 664A.7), and the presence of the defendant in the alleged victim's residence poses a threat to the safety of the alleged victim, persons residing with the alleged victim, or members of the victim's immediate family. The basis is a complaint or affidavit submitted to the Court.

An ex-parte temporary No Contact order can be issued by a court in a domestic abuse assault allegation based upon a probable cause affidavit from the Protected Party. A hearing is then held with the Defendant present for a permanent No Contact Order (which is issued for 1 year). In a chapter 236 domestic abuse proceeding, the plaintiff must prove the allegation of domestic abuse by a preponderance of the evidence. Iowa Code � 236.4(1). Proof of domestic abuse requires proof of an assault as defined in section 708.1. Iowa Code � 236.2(2). "Assault can be committed in several ways." Bacon, 567 N.W.2d at 417; see also Iowa Code � 708.1(1)-(3). ...(2) Any act which is intended to place another in fear of immediate physical contact which will be painful, injurious, insulting, or offensive, coupled with the apparent ability to execute the act." Assault requires "an overt act" intended "to make the [victim] fear immediate painful, injurious, insulting or offensive physical contact."State v. Keeton, 710 N.W.2d 531, 534-35 (Iowa 2006). Thus, "[a] mere threat, without more, is not necessarily an assault by placing another in fear." State v. Law, 306 N.W.2d 756, 759 (Iowa 1981), overruled on other ground by State v. Wales,325 N.W.2d 87, 89 (Iowa 1982). The focus is on the actor's intent, not the alleged victim's expectations. Bacon, 567 N.W.2d at 418. The fact that the victim may or may not have been afraid is not dispositive. Keeton, 710 N.W.2d at 535. Intent may be inferred from the circumstances surrounding the alleged assault.State v. Taylor, 689 N.W.2d 116, 132 (Iowa 2004). Klug v. Kajese, No. 8-030/07-1074 (Iowa App. 4/9/2008)(Iowa App. 2008). Thus, an assault cannot occur via email or text messages, since the victim is not in fear of IMMEDIATE physical contact.


A No Contact Order restrains the Defendant from committing further acts of abuse or threats of abuse and from any contact with the Protected Party. The Defendant is prohibited from communicating or attempting to communicate with the Protected Party in person, in writing, by telephone, voice or electronic messaging systems or through any other means including third persons. However, communication may be made through legal counsel. The Defendant is prohibited from being in the immediate vicinity of the residence or place of employment of the Protected Party. The Defendant is also ordered to stay away from the Protected Party and can not be in the party's presence except in a courtroom during court hearings. this means that if the Defendant accidently arrives at the same location as the Protected Party, the Defendant must leave immediately without communicating with the Protected Party in any manner. The Defendant also can not personally or through a third party, threaten, assault, stalk, molest, attack, harass, or otherwise abuse the protected party, persons residing with the protected party, or members of the protected party's family. The Defendant is also prohibited from using or attempting to use, or threaten to use, physical force against the Protected Party that would reasonably be expected to cause bodily injury.

http://www.robertpetersonlaw.com/Family%20Law%20Issues/No%20Contact%20Order.aspx


Does this comment strike anyone else as odd? Kinda sounds to me like someone may have a friend on the police force.

Iowa has their entire code online.

I'm glad you checked the number, but without a paper, nothing has been served. If you have told the truth without embellishment, then you have commited no crime, and therefore there is no victim, so no order will be issued in your state. Hense the phone call and no papers.

You did your exposure, so yes I agree with the others that no further contact is needed anyway.

Direct hit! Well done, ks! Don't you dare, for one minute, be afraid because some blue shirt told you that your perp was pissed at you.

Good job!

It is NOT illegal to send anything to a Facebook list. That is public and does not conform to invasion of privacy laws. You COULD get a restraining order against her. I would suggest that you do, just to disrupt things. RAISE HELL. Make her wish she didn't have to get up in the morning.

I agree. No court has issued a "no contact order." She has done nothing more here than tell the truth. And she is not contacting the OW, so how can the OW file a "no contact" order on behalf of others? That makes no sense. I bet it is some friend who is a policeman and is trying to scare her.

My husband says to mention that when I talked to her husband last night I said I would make her life miserable because of her attempt to destroy my marriage and family. Is that a threat? Does she have grounds on that?

I agree too. I would have asked to get a copy of the "report". She could have filed a report or the "order" but if an "order" was issued, it would have to be served on you in person. I also absolutely would return fire and file one on them for harassment. Didn't the BS call you to rant? That way if it's true, it'll go both ways and if contact is ever attempted again directly to you OR your spouse, then you have legal teeth too. I'm still skeptical that the order is legit. Where I live you can file a protective order, but it's only temporary. You get to have your day in court, otherwise any one who wanted to could file one.

Hell, yes, it's a threat! It's a threat she should take seriously - but not for bodily harm (that's what they're looking for.)She needs to understand that you will use all legal defenses against her insertion (without your permission) into your marriage. The silly twit.

To whom does he say mention this? Does he know you are posting here? I guess it doesn't matter at this point if he is on board with recovery. But is he?

My advice at this point would be (and take it with a grain of salt because I'm a newb) forget all this nonsense about the no contact order and get to work on the rest of Plan A. I wouldn't waste one more second on this "legal" bullcrap. It's nothing...zero....nil...got it? You've dropped your bomb, and it was a direct hit. HUGE hit!

Forget about the insignificant stuff and get to work on the things that truly matter.

I thought the same thing. Worth getting his name too? Making a comaplaint?

However I agree with the posters, she is trying to get NC between you two and her - which is what you want. Let her have her exile and concentrate on recovery.

Dear kstockett,
Your H is on OW's side still......until he proves by word, action and time he is not.
Please know this.

ROFL.

If a NCO had really been filed, I think the policeman would have been all business about it. I'm with the others - I think the OW just called a friend of hers who happened to be a policeman and asked him to speak to you.

Call him back and ask him for a copy of the NCO.

IG, I decided NOT to bring my opinion to this debate because of my well-known bias against the corrupt, lazy, easily bought and controlled, doughnut-scarfing wastes of oxygen that make up what passes for law enforcement in this country, until someone else broached the subject. Thank you for your contribution to freeing me!
Seriously, a phone-served court order?

Here's what really happened - POSOW or p-whipped hubby have a buddy on the force. (What? A policeman socializing with a skank? Horrors!) They made a call, and Officer Cupcake agreed to try to scare you off!

Rest assured your actions did serious damge to Skanky!

my husband is on board - we just don't understand if me saying that was the ground for the no contact order and he said to ask you guys.
Mind you, I have NEVER contacted this person(OW) who seems to have a no contact order against me. She contacted me once. So, how can a no contact order be against me?
Also, I would like to follow through against her husband when he called me. I felt very threatened and was shaking when he was yelling at me...
I completely understand that the bomb was dropped and the no contact order is a little too late... I would gladly take this to save my marriage. I killed the affair. I am angry at my husband he put me in this situation. I keep saying "look what you did to me." I suppose that's a love buster.
Its' really difficult to try to meet needs when you hurt so badly you can't breath, ya know.
I will FOREVER be haunted that I caught this before it went sexual. He had no plans to stop it. just was seeing how far it was go.
Another thing, I am considered the Angelina Jolie of our town - just saying what others have told me, and she is butt ugly and he was ashamed to be seen with her. I just don't get it.

interesting - I called the PD and the guy said there was nothing on file for me. SAid he didn't know where the (Officer's name) was going with this. No write up or anything.
I suppose I could be served today...