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C4X,
While it is true that a story is a story there is often strong correlating evidence, which many people would like to hear about.
If someone were to spot my W at lunch with some guy off in a corner I would like to know about it, and I would not blame the person who told me one bit. I can then do my own investigation and catch them in the act or not. For that matter if my W were at a bar everyday drinking I would like to know about that, or if she were gambling everyday at some casino.
God Bless
Gamma
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Understood but in the example you posit there is direct knowledge...not in the thread above and they were thinking of mass exposure. And...this belongs to the woman not her friend...it's her responsibility to do the heavy lifting if there is any to do.
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they were thinking of mass exposure. Are we reading the same thread? The OP has been advised over and over to expose to the BW...not to do mass exposure which he has already said he isn't going to do...
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No it's this thread. And, for the purpose of clarity and accuracy he absolutely contmplated mass exposure as I said.and you note. Being advised against that action doesn't alter the fact that he was seriously contemplating that action? Regardless it is tangential to the issue in my view which is that it is not his responsibility to expose anything that he has not actually witnessed or been a direct party to.
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I find this entire discussion fascinating. The premise that there is some reasonable logic that a person not intimately involved in an affair would force themselves intrusively into another family's life that way just astounds me. Interesting...your first argument was not regarding evidence. Who are you and what is your story?
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I find this entire discussion fascinating. The premise that there is some reasonable logic that a person not intimately involved in an affair would force themselves intrusively into another family's life that way just astounds me. It is the affair that is the offense. Not the messenger.
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it is not his responsibility to expose anything that he has not actually witnessed or been a direct party to. I haven't seen you even ask the OP what he has witnessed or what evidence he has? From looking at the posts he knows that the WH has contacted this OW by email, phone and has come to her apartment on XXX date. This is enough information to the BW to investigate.
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SQ...my story is not the issue so let's stay on point. And as a response to your other point, my continuing conversation evolved out of my initial written thoughts.
Prisca...correct but the actions the messenger proposed in my view are not his to take.
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SQ...my story is not the issue so let's stay on point. And as a response to your other point, my continuing conversation evolved out of my initial written thoughts.
Prisca...correct but the actions the messenger proposed in my view are not his to take. Again, how do you know what the OP has for evidence? Why didn't you ask him? If he knows that the married man was contacting the OW by phone, email and was at her house, again, that is enough evidence. What kind of evidence do you think he needs???
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SQ...my story is not the issue so let's stay on point. Oh, I think it "on point" to ask who you are and what your story is when you post advice that is not in line with MB.
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Prisca...correct but the actions the messenger proposed in my view are not his to take. And you are?
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There is no direct knowledge on his part of what occurred based on his story. We have no idea of facilitation other than a story. If in fact it is accurate, then in my view it is the responsibility of the harmed to act. Not a third party with good intentions and no direct knowledge. What I found fascinating was that all the advice that was given was not based on any tangible evidence but a story and the emotion it evoked. Recipe for disaster and harm.
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Prisca..."and you are" means what?
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There is no direct knowledge on his part of what occurred based on his story. We have no idea of facilitation other than a story. If in fact it is accurate, then in my view it is the responsibility of the harmed to act. Not a third party with good intentions and no direct knowledge. What I found fascinating was that all the advice that was given was not based on any tangible evidence but a story and the emotion it evoked. Recipe for disaster and harm. I will keep asking you the same darn question - if your concern is what evidence he has...WHY didn't you ask him what his "direct knowledge" is?
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Prisca..."and you are" means what? So you are refusing to tell us your story? Yes or no will suffice.
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Ah, I'm not sure my advice is not in line. Because I advise significant caution prior to an exposure that is out of bounds in your view. My advice of the harmed exposing is within the MB template. I believe you want to act intemperately and that has nothing to do with MB, just my perspective. And, having a story doesn't give someone the bonefides to give advice, just perspective.
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SQ...the darned answer is you guys already told him to expose. You didn't ask enough...that is the issue.
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Ah, I'm not sure my advice is not in line. I am not just referring to this thread, but another where your post was deleted and you were asked to familiarize yourself with MB concepts before posting...
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Interesting...I responded with information from nationally recognized organizations and that was not in line with MB concepts...that was my bad and won't happen again. As to this thread, please help me understand what advice I gave that was outside the MB concept. I assumed none as there was no deletion here.thanks.
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