Ok, I finished sending out the Facebook messages.

I have to admit, it was scary and I had doubts throughout. But I persevered. When I got to OM's page to work on those messages, it was even scarier for some reason. But then I saw his profile pic with my wife in it and I just blasted away.

Damn picture pisses me off.

Let's wait and see what happens.

I'm so pissed off at WW right now, and doubly pissed off that POSOM has the audacity to put a picture out there of him and my wife!

Woohoo, good going, sw, you did it!

Like you, I too was terrified to send out the letters but still did it all the same (once I hit "send" for the first time, that was it, I was on a roll and just kept going and going). I have MB to thank for giving me the motivation to do it because, honestly, without their encouragement I highly doubt I even would have went through with it at all.

Be glad that you have now got this part over with but still be prepared for what is to come (and you know it is going to in a very big way). Stand your ground, stay as calm as you possibly can and don't let anyone make YOU feel like the bad guy in any of this (some will certainly try).

I think most of us here have a pretty good idea, lol.

It's going to be tough, sw, but don't let that get you down (I've already got some claiming they're going to go after me for harassment and stuff like that but I frankly don't care because it's all just talk, anyway). Yes, you will surely hear all kinds of c**p (and most likely from several different folks) but it is to be expected so get yourself ready for it.

You did well.

You have manned up. Any job worth doing is worth doing it well.

Don't let WW get you in any arguements. Just say why are you mad I just told the truth. Then follow up with I don't talk divorce if WW goes there.

You send to both family and friends. Anyone and everyone who may influence him, and since their picture is all over facebook I would send to all his Facebook contacts.

Now you need to send that FB pic to her family. This will piss her brother off to no end. Make sure her mother gets it as well (she needs a cold, hard slap into reality). Show the kids the pic too. They are plenty old enough, and they have a right to know. Send it to however many friends that you feel may be influential enough to put some serious pressure on this farce. Oh, and did you save that pic and take a screenshot of the FB page?

Good job SW. You did the right thing.

TW, yes I have a screenshot of it. If anybody threatens me with legal action, I'll just refer them to his page and if he changes profile pic, then I'll just send them the pic.

That profile pic alone is enough to justify me send a message to his friends. He's flaunting the fact that he's together with my married wife!

I'm sorry, but a man has to stand up for his family.

Just got a text from my wife: "You're crazy...u need major psyche help...Leave my friends alone...!!!!

Her mother does not have a computer, no email.

Plus OM & WW are planning to take her out to dinner for her birthday, so I don't know what effect a picture will have if she already sees both together now.

I don't like the feeling of this. I feel sick to my stomach and anxious. I feel like sending those FB messages was wrong. Like I shouldn't have been encroaching on other people. But at the same time I need to let people know what's going on. It's not right that she goes around town acting like OM is her new man, all the while she's still married to me! Then to top it off, he flaunts it himself on Facebook.

The thing that keeps me justified in what I did is that profile pic he has. It's the one thing that sickens me, and I know that it would sicken most everyone that I sent a message to. How could it not. If it was someone else and they sent me a message, I would look at it in disbelief that someone could do that to someone else.

People, please give me some encouragement that what I did was the right thing! I need that right now.

Dawn, thanks for your words of encouragement.

Showed my DS the OM's Facebook page last night. He just shook his head in disbelief and said he didn't know what he could do anymore. He wasn't happy. He said the other night when we were all out for my birthday dinner, that he looked across the table at his mom and was just mad. He said he wanted to jump across the table and just shake some sense into her.

I mentioned earlier in this thread about dinner that night. I made a comment about how I could sense something about my DS and his look towards WW. So I actually sensed that correctly! Makes me feel better about any gut feelings I may have throughout this all.

Exposing the affair was the right thing to do, SA. Please stop doubting yourself. MB vets are giving you great advice, right along with Dr. Harley principles.

You are likely to get some nasty replies back from people who don't want to be involved for whatever reason and get a ton of anger from your WW, but it doesn't change the fact that exposure is the first big weapon to kill the affair. Who likes having everyone know their skanky deeds? And how best to fight back by saying YOU are the bad person.

You are doing the right thing, even if some people will not agree with you. Stay focused.

Relax.

Whatever WW, any FB person you messaged says.....deep breath and ride it out without engaging back in conversation or emails.

If any FB response is kind or supportive respond with "Thank you so much for your input".

If you get venom and attacks on your character. Nothing in response.

Your WW is supposed to attack you back for messing with her fantasy adultery. That is a good thing. Means you shook her fantasy about her life tree. Good thing. No love busting back.

Of course you will feel anxious when being brave and getting lobs of anger and judgments of why you did it by toxic people. That is being a human being.

Bravery is doing something even when it is scary and you have fear. Bravery is needed here.

You are not running for class president. You are the head of your family and taking executive action to protect its security. You are playing hard ball. Period.

SW,
YOU DID THE RIGHT THING!!!!

Stand your ground. Most good people will be disgusted by what she's doing.

Good for you!!!
CT

Direct hit! This is what you want! The madder she is the more damage you have caused. You would have reason for concern if she took it all in casually.

Unbelievable. I can't understand your MIL at all.

You've never been more right in your life.

And that's the whole point of exposure, SW; painting this for what it truly is and not for the love sick fantasy that she's projecting. She's feeling quite uncomfortable about things right now.

Keep plowing! Did you get the pic to her brother? If not, do it now. Keep the pressure flowing and don't let up until you've completely covered everyone.

YOU ARE DOING THE RIGHT THING!!

Oh, and don't go getting into any pissing contests with her either. Ignore her texts, and don't reply to any FB replies you may receive that are in the negative. Just ignore them.

Keep going and let exposure do its job

WW sent me another text: "If u don't stop this sh*t I will get a restraining order"

Perfect! Ignore and keep going. Do NOT engage her! Let her choke on it.

BTW, she has absolutely no grounds for a restraining order. Just another empty threat. You never answered; has the brother seen the pic?

Another text from WW: "Do u realize this will hurt the kids...do u realize stunts like this will get back to the kids....? Ur nuts"

I'm not replying back to her texts. I didn't send the FB messages to anyone but adult family and friends. How can it hurt the kids? They already know she's cheating on their dad with OM.