oh yes, definitely, BH. up till then, he said nothing. not when i moved out, not when i bought a house, not when i was living my new life. it was only after he found out (small town, friends in common, not that i was hiding anything though) that he suddenly *discovered* me.

i feel badly that he's struggling to cope, but i do not feel bad about my decision. it's the right one for me. and i guess i need to update my sig line

how's it going, brainy? did you have a nice xmas?

Interesting that some waywards don't realize what they had. Some of them think the BS will always wait for them.

I had a very nice Christmas, thanks for asking.

You sound so well my friend.

oh brainy, you wouldn't believe it - i'm like a whole new person! one of my problems living here was not having any friends. well, since my D, i've had people (women) come out of the woodwork telling me how great i look, how happy i seem, inviting me to drinks, etc. i had no idea how miserable i'd really been before, but shedding that mantle has been amazing. i'm so proud of myself for finally - finally! - making a decision and going with it. my life is so calm, so lovely, now. i have a sweet little house that i love. i have a small view of the ocean. i've made friends. turns out ppl wouldn't socialise with us before because my husband was so unpleasant! at our year's end xmas work do, the headmaster's wife came up to me and said "congratulations! i'm so pleased to see you happy. your husband was hard work." and that's what it's been like. that, and realising that even though i'm old, i'm still attractive. i'm seeing a man who tells me i'm the most amazing woman he's ever met. that's good for a bruised ego, let me tell you! and to be kissed by someone who *wants* to kiss me? who's not just giving a dutiful, undesired peck? holy cow! *that's* what's been missing from my life for longer than the 9 years that used to be in my sig line.

sorry, i got excited there! yes, some WSs are just so wrapped up in themselves that they don't have a clue. mmm, that's not what i mean. they are so full of themselves, so ENTITLED, that they really believe the BS will INDEED wait for them forever! and some of us do but now that i'm in control of my life, i feel SO MUCH BETTER! it is so good to be in charge of everything in my life. no drama, no horrible pit in my stomach; in fact, since splitting, i've had a dramatic drop in some of my health problems, which just goes to show ya!

i do regret the end of my M. but i know, truly know, that i did everything humanly possible to make it a loving, shared partnership. and that in the end, if i couldn't save it, i had to at least save myself. i stayed married after the A because i wanted to give our dd married parents, and instead i taught her to eat poo and like it (via my own actions). she is proud of me now. that's a blessing.

i hope things are well with you, my friend, and that your brain hurts less these days. are you in touch with scotty?

hello everyone. it's been 4 years since my last post, and thought i would do a final one, as i think of you all often.

first off: i am fully recovered from eXWHs affair. I've dealt with the baggage, and we've become amicable, though i have not been able to repair his relationship with our dd (that's his job).

i went into dating again with a new outlook: be cutthroat. if you're not compatible, cut them loose asap. this was effective, if sometiimes depressing. i discovered men in my age bracket were usually one of 2 things: wanting to replace their wife asap regardless of compatibility (ie wanting a mum, not a partner) or just looking for sex. i wasn't on board with either of those, and didn't get a lot of second dates! just as i was thinking that i was content enough in my life, i met a wonderful man. and now I'm remarried! i have a new baby grand dd now, and we've moved to a brand new location and started our own business, with a gorgeous country home near my dd. i never dreamed this could be me.

Dr Harley's Buyers, Renters and Freeloaders was very helpful during my dating journey, and it gave me the knowledge and patience to wait for the right man. a man that treats me like he really LOVES me, a man who wants SF, a man who enjoys spending his time with me! and its blissful. i never in my life thought i could be this happy.

thank you to everyone here on the boards who gave me hope when i felt hopeless, support so i could be strong, and friendship when i was feeling less than human. you saved me from living the rest of my life in agony, and made it possible for me to have a strong, fulfilling marriage. may you find yourselves on your journeys, with peace and happiness.

Congratulations Letty!!! So glad to hear of your happy life. You certainly deserve it. And congrats on your little granddaughter!

So nice to hear from you, my friend. I’m so happy to hear your wonderful update. How many grand babies do you have now?
We just had our 3rd. Well she’s 6 months now.

Does your DH know about MB at all?

And you’re so correct that it’s your WXH responsibility to fix his relationship with your DD.

So happy to hear your lovely update.

Letty (Getty), I am happy to read your post. So glad to hear you are doing so well, and that you have found happiness and contentment and a truly good life. I hope one day to see a Rush concert with you. (Husbands with or w/o)