I need help. . .my marriage is not perfect and nor do I believe it will ever be but my spouse and I are working together and making efforts to make it successful. My problem involves a very close friend of mine. Back in January my spouse was very angry with me for staying out with friends all night. At the time I could understand why he hadn't gotten so upset, since he told me to stay. When he called I told him what we were doing, and I was with people we knew - most of them married. A week later after things had calmed down my spouse informed me that he discovered a picture on my friend's spouse's cell phone involving a nake girl. My spouse, who is very reserved, was concerned that her husband was cheating on her and thought that he might try something with me. It was nice to see my husband had a jealous side; but shocking beyond means to hear what he discovered.

Here are some background items on Mr. Smith (made-the-name-up):
1. He travels A LOT for his company
2. He always claims to be working late or having to go leave to tend to something
3. He's quite the charmer and good looking

Here are some background items on Mrs. Smith:
1. Her parents marriage ended in divorce because of cheating
2. She avoids confrontation, by all means
3. She's been sneaking his phone to "check" to see what texts messages he has from co-workers
4. She's had concerns before with a previous co-worker being to "friendly"

This weekend, she saw a co-worker of Mr. Smith rubbing on his leg and eating off of his plate. Mrs. Smith avoids discussing the subject and Mr. Smith is upset with her for making them leave the party early.

I've tried numerous times to suggest to Mrs. Smith to talk to Mr. Smith and to let him know what she's feeling but by no prevail have I succeeded. On top of this, I know some of Mr. Smith's co-workers and they have told some "stories" about possible cheating and how they all wondered how Mrs. Smith doesn't know or doesn't suspect. But again this is all hear-say.

My spouse does not want me to say anything, as he feels it is none of our business. I also don't want any hardships to come between me and this couple especially because of hear-say. But my heart doesn't like seeing Mrs. Smith being taken advantage of, and if I was in her shoes I would want someone to tell me. I'm at a loss - what can I do to help her? Or to help their marriage? They do have kids together and have been together for over 10 years now.

You should definitely tell her. She deserves to know!