IGNORE! YOU ARE DARK!

and block her bloody number! that skank has no business contacting you for anything, ever.

As if I'd want to talk to "PEGI" after her lies and manipulation, what could she possibly say to "clear the air"

nothing! she's only trying to manipulate you since WS can't quite get there. IGNORE!

She's pretty good at manipulating. I know I shouldn't think about it but I wonder why the text, is it a reaction to;

1. Isildur being advised contact details required for visit
2. Me telling inlaws about my suspician re her confirmed and her lying to my kids and fueing Isildur's anger
3. to exposure

All of the above

Happy, I really feel for you having to face these breaks in Plan B. I can't imagine having to deal with a skank who has the audacity to think you can sit down and "discuss" things to HER satisfaction.

The feelings this would elicit, the thoughts of Isildur and her, are all taking the focus off you and your life. Sooo...

X2!!!

You can't control her. You can't control him. But you can certainly give your best effort to stop them having any control over YOU and YOUR decisions. Dark, dark, DARK.

Rather than questioning why this response (an answer you can't get because lets face it, waywards are dishonest, and YOU are in Plan B), lets put the focus on you.

What do you need to do to tighten up Plan B so WH and OW can't try to manipulate you?

How can you ensure your Plan B arrangements for DS6 stand firm?

What you are going to do to Plan A yourself and your kids?

You're in Plan B. Why didn't you change your number?

I never expected to hear from her. Prior to going dark she was starting to make her presence known:

1. Replied to DS6 text from my phone to Isildur.
2. Talking to DS6 during his telephone conversation with Isildur, knowing its was on speakerphone.
3. Sitting in car out front of house whilst Isildur packed his remaining belongings.

I've spoken with children and told them they are not messengers Isildur is to communicate through IM. Visitation arrangements for DS6 will be via IM only, if he doesn't like it bad luck, he should have replied to my emails trying to organise before I went dark.

We had tacos for dinner and a special dessert, then played games. Deciding on something special for Sunday afternoon, will have to check weather forecast first.

You're in Plan B now. These are all things that you can control and try to prevent as much as possible.

Change your phone number. Clearly blocking WH is not enough. From experience reading here, this is always the case, sooner or later.

Don't use speaker phone.

Putty up the Plan B cracks.

My Plan B provides for emergency texts re children, thats why number hasn't changed. Isildur has not communicated via text for a month or so (prior to going dark). His communication was always by email.

This needs to change. Do you have a house phone? Or do the older kids have phones?

Scotty, sorry I didn't repl I somehow missed this post, dang internet has been playing up, doing strnage things, loading etc.

I thinks its ging to take lots of ignoring for him to get the message. He is one entitled wayward at the moment.

Nails are Plum ??? forgot the name, nice purplish tone and sparkly ... different to what I've ever worn before, so a nice treat.

I nearly forgot .... tests results all clear not malignant. Thank you everyone for your thoughts and prayers.

Yay, glad to hear it happy!

BH Iam hoping this reply is successful, this is my 4th attempt to reply.

Yes to home phone. Isildur telephones DS6 between 6.30pm - 7.30pm. We have caller ID and as a precaution children answer phone between 5pm - 9 pm.

Eldest children have phones, they also arrange visits direct with Isildur.

Parental notification re children in case of emergency, accident or earthquake (very relevant here)via text message, rather than telephone contact

I would remove the emergency contact going to YOU. Your WH can contact your IM or one of your other children in case of emergency.

What has your DS6 been told about OW?

Of course you are legally entitled to know where your WH takes DS6 for his visits. I would have sent the request through the IM, and if it wasn't met, I would speak to an attorney about if you were legally allowed to keep your DS6 from going on visitations until you know this info. Could your IM maybe 411 his number and find out that way?

In 2.5 years of PB, the only "emergencies" that my WH has contacted me about were when the boys were going to be late arriving home. He had DS11 call the landline and leave a message. He does NOT have my new cell phone number. He doesn't need it. If he needs to contact me because of an emergency, and I'm not home, he still knows my parent's phone number, as well as my BIL and my original IM. They ALL have my cell number, so they could get in contact with me. It is more harmful for them to have your cell number. Get that hole patched up.

And, do NOT even think about responding to OW. In the future, remember that PB INCLUDES OW.

OW is texting you to help WH handle things. She is trying to get things in control.
There is obviously irritation in the love nest (yay)
Ignore any texts from her.

You owe her zero communication.

Plan B her too.

She is trying to make 'nice' so that once you find out her street address, you don't take your rifles and knives to kill her in the middle of the night. The exposure has made both WH and especially OW paranoid about their situation, which is stinky no matter how they try to reframe it with one another and the world.

Anyway.

Stay dark in Plan B.

Have your IM tell them that the only contact point they have is IM. No other communication will be utilized.

Period.

Factually.

WH and OW just don't get it yet. They are on their own with each other and you have given WH his freedom....with the price of zero access to YOU.

Sure, you were his broodmare and nanny and still are, in essence, but there is no more for you to donate towards their cause.

By tests, do you mean STD tests? If so, be sure to go back and get RE-tested in 6 months. HIV doesn't show up at first.

happy, i was thinking of the phone situation last night. couldn't you use cheap pay-as-you-go phones for the kids when they have visitation? (1 for you, 1 for them?) they are getting pretty cheap here, though nothing like the $15 they are overseas.

very glad to hear the mole was not malignant. though i do hope you also had the (very humiliating, i know, especially when i called for results and the nurse thought *I* was the cheater) STI tests.