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Thanks, everyone. I got locked out at 3am again, been trying to slowly work through a few more names since 6am as I get ready for work, but keep getting blocked by fb even when I leave 2-3 minutes in between - maybe they have me flagged at this point.
I have received a couple of not so supportive messages, and one warning from a friend that my account must have been hijacked (sadly no, buddy - it's the truth). That was a happy thought though. My fb account hijacked instead of my family.
Am I becoming dark myself? Someone told me I was not being Christian and I ought to turn the other cheek (what do you think I've been doing to no avail for 3 1/2 years? Sheesh!) And my first thought was, "You know what? I AM finally turning the other cheek - and she can kiss it:)" Ooooh. I'm scaring myself.
Hopefully I will get the last 20 or so names tonight. If not, I think I did pretty good anyway, right? Received word last evening that rodent had blocked her friends list. Gosh, that public arrogance over all her "friends" had a dent put in it. Funny how their own weaknesses take them down. I was happy to hear that maybe she had a little taste of the nausea and fear that has hit me so often in all of this. Empathy is not in her vernacular, but I guess even connecting the dots to some of her own behavior would be something.
Hugs to all of you.
Married: 22 years Me: BW 41 Him: WH 43 Sons: 19, 17, 12 Daughter: 16 DD 8/09 EA started 8/08 PA started 7/09 Brief recovery of a few months in there. Separated 10/10 Legal Separation 8/11 Plan B 5/17/12 Plan D 5/31/12 My Story
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Am I becoming dark myself? Someone told me I was not being Christian and I ought to turn the other cheek (what do you think I've been doing to no avail for 3 1/2 years? Sheesh!) And my first thought was, "You know what? I AM finally turning the other cheek - and she can kiss it:)" Ooooh. I'm scaring myself. Oh brother. Defending evil by covering it up is evil. That person needs to read the Bible. Send him/her these scriptures and remind them adultery is evil, exposing evil is not. Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. Ephesians 5:11 Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. 21 But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God. John 3:20-21.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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And my first thought was, "You know what? I AM finally turning the other cheek - and she can kiss it:)" Ooooh. I'm scaring myself. \ This went over my head the first time!
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Am I becoming dark myself? Someone told me I was not being Christian and I ought to turn the other cheek (what do you think I've been doing to no avail for 3 1/2 years? Sheesh!) And my first thought was, "You know what? I AM finally turning the other cheek - and she can kiss it:)" Ooooh. I'm scaring myself. Oh brother. Defending evil by covering it up is evil. That person needs to read the Bible. Send him/her these scriptures and remind them adultery is evil, exposing evil is not. Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. Ephesians 5:11 Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. 21 But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God. John 3:20-21. Thanks for those, Melody:) So true.
Married: 22 years Me: BW 41 Him: WH 43 Sons: 19, 17, 12 Daughter: 16 DD 8/09 EA started 8/08 PA started 7/09 Brief recovery of a few months in there. Separated 10/10 Legal Separation 8/11 Plan B 5/17/12 Plan D 5/31/12 My Story
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Am I becoming dark myself? Someone told me I was not being Christian and I ought to turn the other cheek (what do you think I've been doing to no avail for 3 1/2 years? Sheesh!) And my first thought was, "You know what? I AM finally turning the other cheek - and she can kiss it:)" Ooooh. I'm scaring myself.
Hopefully I will get the last 20 or so names tonight. If not, I think I did pretty good anyway, right? Received word last evening that rodent had blocked her friends list. Gosh, that public arrogance over all her "friends" had a dent put in it. Funny how their own weaknesses take them down. I was happy to hear that maybe she had a little taste of the nausea and fear that has hit me so often in all of this. Empathy is not in her vernacular, but I guess even connecting the dots to some of her own behavior would be something. I told you you would feel differently after exposure! Feels good, doesnt it my friend?
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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Internet got shut off for a few days, and I come back to MB to find this! You've exposed! Hooray, hooray!
One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger
I will not spend my life this way.
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And.....keep in mind.....if your WH somehow does attempt to aim wrath at you about this or anything, though he is not supposed to.....
keep your cool
Whatever goes through your mind in case of a confrontation, do not speak it.
Breathe but do not speak.
Then, get to safety as quick as possible.
Venom from exposure shows you hit the mark bullseye.
No engagement about venom though. No defending self with words,etc.
Just calmness. Bravery.
Hopefully he will stay away.
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So rodent's own relative sent me a slightly more incriminating photo than the one I had to post of her and pinoke. So grateful for that. I wish I had not destroyed all the garbage I saved for awhile. It was too awful to keep around, and I never thought he'd get this bad. I also finally texted her BH for the first time in months, gave him an email set up just for this, told him I'm doing whatever I can to take this down and either help me, or get out of my way. We have protected people who do not deserve to be protected for far too long.
Married: 22 years Me: BW 41 Him: WH 43 Sons: 19, 17, 12 Daughter: 16 DD 8/09 EA started 8/08 PA started 7/09 Brief recovery of a few months in there. Separated 10/10 Legal Separation 8/11 Plan B 5/17/12 Plan D 5/31/12 My Story
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So rodent's own relative sent me a slightly more incriminating photo than the one I had to post of her and pinoke. So grateful for that. I wish I had not destroyed all the garbage I saved for awhile. It was too awful to keep around, and I never thought he'd get this bad. I also finally texted her BH for the first time in months, gave him an email set up just for this, told him I'm doing whatever I can to take this down and either help me, or get out of my way. We have protected people who do not deserve to be protected for far too long. Good job. See you're getting support from rodent's own family. Did you hear anything back from her BH? I bet rodent is
FWW/BW (me) WH 2nd M for both Blended Family with 7 kids between us Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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way to go rainy, way to go. now, tell us: isn't exposure the best thing ever? do you remember how afraid you were? don't you feel empowered now? go back and read your thread :O)
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So rodent's own relative sent me a slightly more incriminating photo than the one I had to post of her and pinoke. So grateful for that. I wish I had not destroyed all the garbage I saved for awhile. It was too awful to keep around, and I never thought he'd get this bad. I also finally texted her BH for the first time in months, gave him an email set up just for this, told him I'm doing whatever I can to take this down and either help me, or get out of my way. We have protected people who do not deserve to be protected for far too long. Good job. See you're getting support from rodent's own family. Did you hear anything back from her BH? I bet rodent is Yes, that is a picture of her. No, I didn't hear back from BH, but I didn't send it til tonight and it's 2 hours later in their time zone. Whatever. I don't need him. If he chooses to keep enabling, so be it. I'll take her down myself. He can get out of the way, or go down with her at this point.
Married: 22 years Me: BW 41 Him: WH 43 Sons: 19, 17, 12 Daughter: 16 DD 8/09 EA started 8/08 PA started 7/09 Brief recovery of a few months in there. Separated 10/10 Legal Separation 8/11 Plan B 5/17/12 Plan D 5/31/12 My Story
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Whatever. I don't need him. If he chooses to keep enabling, so be it. I'll take her down myself. He can get out of the way, or go down with her at this point. that's my girl!
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way to go rainy, way to go. now, tell us: isn't exposure the best thing ever? do you remember how afraid you were? don't you feel empowered now? go back and read your thread :O) Yes, it is empowering. I do feel better. I wish I'd done it the day I found out (didn't know about SSA or MB then). rodent's niece sent me a horrific fb message she had tapped that rodent sent to pinoke - all about their great sex, of course. She is a disgusting, filthy, vile vermin hooker. Her niece is a teenager - I did not message teenagers on fb, but she knew about it from her mom and the family drama. She said she was sorry I had to read something so disgusting, sorry that her horrible hooker family member seduced my husband, and she just wanted me to know that her mom had sent rodent's own fb message back to her, told her her messages were tapped, and maybe she'd better get help instead of denying everything on her page after exposure. What a stupid bimbo. She flat out denied everything, publicly. Makes it that much easier to bury her with her own idiocy when people realize she's a lying skank. Her sweet little niece also told me that rodent's BH had spoken with her mom tonight, and that rodent is completely freaking out that she had the message. Heh heh. Let her stew. Let her be terrified that I'm the one who tapped into it and I have all her sick private fb messages to my husband. I do need to find a way to get them. Oh, one other pleasant thing - lawyer actually called me back on alienation of affection case. I was at work, so he had to leave a message, but will call him tomorrow. He said maybe we can do it. Sweet! Anything to take her down at this point. I don't care if I can't get a dime out of her. Just want to haul her butt into court, subpoena all the emails, text messages, and fb messages, and invite everyone she knows to show up at the court house. Now THAT is a happy thought. Most empowering, and saddest, thing in all of this is that I have seen and heard so much filth and garbage from my jacka** WH ( which I knew was there, but it's different when you're bombarded with it) that I don't think I could look at him again without puking my guts out. He is horrible, dirty, disgusting, and awful. I hate him. I'm sad that I do, but I just hate him - for what he's done to me, to my kids, to himself, to our marriage, our family, our lives - I never want to see him, talk to him, or think about him again. I was so mad tonight that I almost threw away all our wedding pictures, everything I could find from 22 years of our lives. I took a deep breath and decided to leave them all crammed in the boxes they are still in since we moved. Maybe my kids will want to see them someday. Maybe not. He's destroyed even every happy memory, that's the saddest thing. I have to face him once more in court to get the permanent PO (everyone keep praying for me on that one, will you?) God willing, I get it, and he's out of our lives forever. We can bury him and move on. I am a bit perturbed that he has maintained such composure during exposure. Shows that he actually can control himself when he chooses to. How ridiculously manipulative. I hope the judge can see through his smooth talking. He left his tractor in my backyard a month ago. Started the yard for the kids, then left when rodent freaked out that he was at my house. Never bothered to come get it. Actually, he left it in the neighbor's yard, and her brother was kind enough to move it for me a couple of days after I had surgery, so they could work on her yard. It won't start, dang it, or I might have figured out how to run it into a ditch by now. So today my 19-year-old (not listed on the PO because unfortunately his job is tied to his father at the moment; he has to communicate with him) called and told me dad needs to come get his tractor. I took a deep breath and said, "I am no longer in contact with your father. You are not obligated to communicate with him in any way, except when you absolutely have to for work. Just tell him I will not be communicating with him through you and that's it. Anytime he asks, tell him that's what I said - broken record until he stops. Better yet, don't answer the phone for him." For about half a second I thought maybe I should contact IM, set up a time for him to get his tractor. Then I decided, "Forget that." Not my deal. He knows how to communicate through IM. Even if he did communicate with her, he left it here for a month - he doesn't need it. It's a clever Plan B/PO violation. Let him try to come get it - I'll call them to haul his butt off my property. If he's unsure of anything, he can refer to the protective order. Oh, and if he doesn't cough up CS tomorrow, maybe I'll sell the blankety-blank thing and pay the bills. The thoughts get happier all the time
Married: 22 years Me: BW 41 Him: WH 43 Sons: 19, 17, 12 Daughter: 16 DD 8/09 EA started 8/08 PA started 7/09 Brief recovery of a few months in there. Separated 10/10 Legal Separation 8/11 Plan B 5/17/12 Plan D 5/31/12 My Story
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Wow, wow!! Has there been a fire lit my friend? Yes, yes on the alienation of affection because Utah does have that. Are you going for alimony also? You should. I love the support you're getting from rodent's family. Maybe her BH will stop being a doormat? We'll see. Good job with your DS19. I can't stand when parents use their kids. You'll do fine at the PO because you have strength now.
FWW/BW (me) WH 2nd M for both Blended Family with 7 kids between us Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Wow, wow!! Has there been a fire lit my friend? Yes, yes on the alienation of affection because Utah does have that. Are you going for alimony also? You should. I love the support you're getting from rodent's family. Maybe her BH will stop being a doormat? We'll see. Good job with your DS19. I can't stand when parents use their kids. You'll do fine at the PO because you have strength now. Thanks, Brain:) I hope there's a fire lit. Something's gotta change. I definitely will do alienation of affection if I can get an attorney to take the case. Do you mean alimony from WH? (Not the alienation case?) Yes, if he signs on the D to give me what I want, great. If he keeps threatening to have our lawyers duke it out, then I will refile on grounds of adultery, name her, haul her butt into court like some of you have suggested, and even if I get less CS now (which is NOT my first choice), the jerk will have to pay me alimony for 22 years, so it'll actually add up to be quite a bit more in the long run;. Thanks on my son. (I get the S, but what does D in DS stand for?) Yes, WH is a jerk to try to put him in the middle, knowing he has influence on his job. I just decided I would save him from it right now, at the very beginning. OW's family tried to help her BS. So did I. Oh well! Get some sleep if you're gonna stay up all night tonight.
Married: 22 years Me: BW 41 Him: WH 43 Sons: 19, 17, 12 Daughter: 16 DD 8/09 EA started 8/08 PA started 7/09 Brief recovery of a few months in there. Separated 10/10 Legal Separation 8/11 Plan B 5/17/12 Plan D 5/31/12 My Story
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Darling son. Here Acronyms and Abbreviations I'm so glad you get the alimnoy.
FWW/BW (me) WH 2nd M for both Blended Family with 7 kids between us Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Way to go, rainy. I have been following your thread and I had wanted to bang my head on the wall everytime you wanted to put off the exposure. I just got to say that I am so PROUD of you!! I honestly believe that exposure MUST be done whether you want the POS WH back or not. And boy does it feel good! I'm glad you found your backbone ~RQ
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Rainy, you sound so much more determined, and strong. I guess now we may have converted another poster to the light side of exposure. If he keeps threatening to have our lawyers duke it out, then I will refile on grounds of adultery, name her, haul her butt into court like some of you have suggested, and even if I get less CS now (which is NOT my first choice), the jerk will have to pay me alimony for 22 years, so it'll actually add up to be quite a bit more in the long run;. I would actually suggest you do this anyways.
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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Married: 22 years Me: BW 41 Him: WH 43 Sons: 19, 17, 12 Daughter: 16 DD 8/09 EA started 8/08 PA started 7/09 Brief recovery of a few months in there. Separated 10/10 Legal Separation 8/11 Plan B 5/17/12 Plan D 5/31/12 My Story
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Rainy, you sound so much more determined, and strong. I guess now we may have converted another poster to the light side of exposure. If he keeps threatening to have our lawyers duke it out, then I will refile on grounds of adultery, name her, haul her butt into court like some of you have suggested, and even if I get less CS now (which is NOT my first choice), the jerk will have to pay me alimony for 22 years, so it'll actually add up to be quite a bit more in the long run;. I would actually suggest you do this anyways. Would you? Rather than settle peacefully and have more to take care of my kids now, while I have 3 at home? Why, Scotland, just out of curiosity? And yes - you all brought be back into the light. Thanks:)
Last edited by rainysweet; 05/25/12 08:35 AM.
Married: 22 years Me: BW 41 Him: WH 43 Sons: 19, 17, 12 Daughter: 16 DD 8/09 EA started 8/08 PA started 7/09 Brief recovery of a few months in there. Separated 10/10 Legal Separation 8/11 Plan B 5/17/12 Plan D 5/31/12 My Story
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