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jayne241....thank you for bumping this today.
It's doing me some good. I'll have to keep reading it when I'm having another bad day.
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BH, 46
STBXWW, 41, Serial Cheater
D-Day #1 5-26-2006 (Our Wedding Aniversary)
D-Day #2 12-26-2007
D-Day #3 5-11-2008
Separated 1-5-2008
STBX filed for divorce March 2009
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Apply when needed...... 
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Posts: 1,549
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Is Ark still lurking these days? I miss these wonderful posts!
Me:BW, FWH 1DD 1DS
Status: Chronicled in Dr. Suess's "The Zax"
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 680
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I needed that post so desperately. Although I am doing so much better, I need to be still. I still tend to focus on WH and OW. I'm in plan B but I stray with my thoughts and going by the OW's' house. I need to "let go"....I am still praying for miracles though.
BS: 41
WS: 52
Marriage 20 years on 6/9/10
Dday on 4/27/10
Husband moved out 5/12/10
Plan B....5/21/10
DD 15
DS 11
DS 10
DS 7
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bumpin' for meggin, too........
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Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 162
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This was exactly what I needed to hear this morning.
Be still...
BS: Me, 27
WS: Her, 24
EA: October
PA: 11/22/10
Moved out 12/3/10
Moved back in mid-January.
In tentative recovery. Is that the sun I see, breaking through the fog?
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Posts: 274
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Thank you, wildhorses! I will be still. I will also print this out so I can read it when my heart tries to overrule common sense.
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stuck and meggin,
Our minds can create such chaos and turmoil when it is unsure what decisions to make and actions to take.
We need to remind ourselves to take a moment to breathe and just be still - even if only for a few moments.
Often times, I felt I had kicked into a life or death reaction - as if what was happening was to that magnitude.
Know that no matter what happens with your wayward. YOU will be okay. You will not die if you make a decision that doesn't turn out as you expected.
Your life will be different, that's for sure. Mine is much better without my wayward. It could have been great with him, but he chose otherwise.
Your outcomes with your wayward are yet to come. Know that they do not define you and they do not decide on what your life will be. YOU do.
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Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 279
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*BUMP*
for ALL Betrayed Spouses...Wise words indeed
THANK YOU NESRE for the thread
(((BS)))
BS/ME 47 Met on blind date
WH 46(Alcoholic,drugs?)
DS1:18 DS2:15
1st A EA9/07 PA10/07 NC11/07
2nd A EA/PA-10/2010
Found out- 11/20/2010
He moved out-1/1/2011 same apt.cmplx as OW(&her kids)
PlanB-1/1/11(broken)
NEW PB-2/11 Taking it one day at a time
There are two kinds of people in the world: Those who say to God, "Thy will be done" and those to whom God says, "Alright then, have it your way." ~C .S.Lewis
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we are definately driven by fear and our mind reacts as if it were a life or death matter.
My fear is to be alone for the rest of my life....but i m not alone...it is all mind made. sure I am no longer with WH, but there are so many people who care about me and love me...surely more than WH ever will or had...
Great post..and great thread!
blessing
atena
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wow, this brought tears to my eyes.
Perfect words for me right now, so thank you. I also feel in a panic like every decision needs to happen now, yet I'm afraid to make a decision.
Today, I will just be. and be okay with that.
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BUMP for betrayed spouses needing strength!
Married 7, Separated summer 2010
me, BW: 31
WH: 31
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Posts: 235
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Me: BH 40
WW 39
S13, D9
Married 15 yrs together 19!!!
D Day July 11,2011
WW in P.A. with OW
WW wants D
Almost done
Former Tryingtofeelgood
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 8,344
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This will always be one of my FAVORITE posts.
I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten. My Story Recovered!
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Thanks for this beautiful message. I really needed to hear it! Now, to put it into practice, that's the next step... But thanks.
Me, BS: 35
WxH: 36 "HAM" Hearts a mess
6yo DS (with WxH), 9 and 12yo DDs from first marriage
Discovered DH's affair in June, 2011
"I'm not having an affair, you're crazy." major gaslighting
Served with divorce papers on 2/3/12
Divorce final 7/29/2013
Living day by day, counting my blessings, loving my children
Personal Recovery well underway!
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BH, 46
STBXWW, 41, Serial Cheater
D-Day #1 5-26-2006 (Our Wedding Aniversary)
D-Day #2 12-26-2007
D-Day #3 5-11-2008
Separated 1-5-2008
STBX filed for divorce March 2009
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