Yep. I've learned a lot from my brother about dealing with doctors and medications. He's not a doctor but he's worked in the medical field for many years - on the financial end of things. He's taught me to be an assertive advocate of my own health, including thorough discussions of medications (and not only with the doc but online.)

Interesting story I've been meaning to share. D20 was home from college and we were all at the movies. H and the boys were getting tickets and DD and I were in line for goodies - a LONG line. We couldn't help but overhear a man talking to his male buddy about his marriage problems - how he and his wife were on the brink of divorce and he had told her he would do anything to stop it, etc... (She wanted the divorce, obviously, he did not.)

My daughter looked at me. She said, "Mom - you should tell him about that program of yours and Dad." I told her that would seem crazy - and how was I supposed to talk to him without him knowing I was eavesdropping... that he'd think I was nuts. She said, "So what? You never know - maybe it'll change things for them and if he thinks you're crazy - you're a stranger - so, who cares!" I told her I'd write it down for him - and then leave it up to him.

SO...I got out a notepad and pen. I wrote a short note explaining I couldn't help but overhear - that after 20 years of marriage my H and I went through a horrific time and almost divorced, but now we are happier than ever. I wrote down the website address here and listed a few of Dr. H's books. I didn't write my name or anything. I didn't want him to think I was trying to get him to contact me - that I was selling anything or whatnot.

That really had to be one of the strangest things I've done - yet - I really hope that man does visit our little home here!!!
Good for my daughter - for looking out for someone else's best interests rather than my feeling embarrassed.

On another note - I am now back in classes so times are very busy! LOTS of homework for me this term. I have to take Spanish (well, any language but I chose Spanish) - 4 semesters of it... UGH!!!! I'm too old to learn a foreign language! LOL

what a great move! kudos to DD!

don't fret, sunny, spanish is easy!

como esta?

and if you visit mexico, you definitely need to know "donde esta el bano?" (the n should have a tilde on top, but i don't know how to type that!)

see?

Letty (and others): Open a blank sheet in Microsoft Word. Click "Insert", then "Symbol". You should see tildes, accent graves, accent agues, and umloughs(sp?) to a fare-the-well. Click on the one you want, and copy/paste it from the Word document into your MB reply.

Sometimes it works, occasionally it will not.

Muy Bien, Letty! Y tu?

Where's the bathroom? LOL!

Si!

I'm much better at reading it than hearing it and having to respond quickly... I guess that takes some time - and of course, I've only just begun.

Gracious, Se�or NG!

Da nada, Se�ora!

CUUUUUTE smiley!!!!!!!!!

Good luck SD!
If you only learn half as well as you teach us, you'll ace it!

Thanks, WLE!

I tend to not have as much time to post when I'm immersed in classes but I try to keep up. I'm also taking Logic and Public Speaking this semester. Logic is very interesting! Both Logic and Spanish are very heavily loaded with homework but I have great professors.

In speech, I have to do a 10 minute informative speech later on in the semester. I'm actually thinking about doing my speech on Marriage Builders. It's been on my mind a lot lately how beneficial it would be if more people started out in marriage knowing the principles we are all learning. Being that most students in class are around 20, perhaps they might benefit from hearing some basic tenets. Part of me, however, wonders if they'd just be thinking, "yeah...whatever....."

Sadly, most people don't pay much attention to marriage related stuff until they are in trouble.

I would start your speech with that last sentence..might make them listen better.

Good point, Wondering!

public speaking - yay! i agree with wondering; that's a great starter! 10 minutes is a looong time for an informative speech, so you're going to need to plump up your transitions with attention-getters. some of the real-life stories from the books would be very helpful there. you can use them as rhetorical starters. does your speech need to be seminar-style, or all just you?

i remember my first public speaking speech. god i was nervous. i talked about running (i think - over 25 years ago!), and brought in my 1st husband's 27 pairs of runners as a visual aid!

logic - i remember that one. just the other day, some of my former students who are at uni now were arguing online whether a baby is sentient! have you had the standard "your mother, wife, and daughter capsize and you can only rescue one..." question yet? i imagine you'd have to change it to father, husband, and son! the answer differs by cultures.

I think a speech about MB would be awesome. I gave a little speech to a college girl I knew and gave her the book ONE ( I think that was title) by Harley.

She came back a few days later and said " He is totally a free loader-I see that so clearly now!"

She broke off her engagement the next day. I was in shock it all happened so fast.

The 20 somethings may listen to you more if you speak from that book. It speaks to those who are interested in getting married...think it talks about renters, buyers etc. I think many of them can relate better to that. Just something to think about.

Excellent point, Blue! I think you're onto something there!

Years ago I was in Toastmasters (an international speaking club) so I'm no rookie to public speaking - but a bit rusty, I'd say. I have to have this class for my Communications major. It's a bit strange to have to try and give speeches that a 20-something audience can relate to. I feel more like a teacher than a classmate, lol, but hopefully I'll do an entertaining enough job that they'll appreciate it. But yes - 10 minutes is a bit lengthy in trying to keep their attention! Doesn't have to be seminar style - can really be however we want it to be though.

And no - I haven't heard the "choose to save one" sitch yet! Geez - that'd be awful!!! But - philosophy classes always like to throw those type of things at you.

Hey, Sunny:

It's been a while! I come on the site every once in awhile to catch up with you ... and read stories.

Today isn't exactly DDay (the day I found out) two years ago. But it's the antiversary of FWH's golf trip when he had his affair.

I had thought about the date coming up a few weeks ago, but then it didn't hit me until today. And even though it's bumming me out, it's not consuming me like it did last year.

I wonder if FWH will even think about it. Probably not. And that's probably a good thing.

Just wish it never had to be in my head.

Other than this antiversary issue, we are good. Solid. Happy. Meeting needs.

Hope you are well and managing to keep up with your studies and family life, too!

Cheers,
Sweet

SWEETPEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's so good to hear from you and especially that you and your H are doing well! I've been wondering about you!

Sorry about the anti-versary. Never fun. I've been thinking about my upcoming ones but trying not to too much. We're heading into the time of affair discovery, H moving out, and all of that in just a few weeks. But you know - it really is MUCH easier this year than last - at least at this point. I think my main problem this year is that during the roughest week, date-wise, I will be at my hardest point hormonally. That can't be good. If anyone has any coping suggestions, let me know!

Although.... next week I have a comprehensive appointment set up with a "wellness specialist" in my area. I'm having all my chemical levels tested - hormones, thyroid, etc... as well as an EKG, bone density scan, and other stuff. After the appt I'll be going on a special cleansing diet and the doctor will recommend what supplements I should take and possibly bio-identical hormones. Part of the program is meeting with a nutritionist as well. I'm really excited to get going with this! It's a very comprehensive, holistic approach to staving off some of the side effects of aging.

I have not mentioned to H that the anti-versaries are upcoming. I do think I should let him know that this could be a difficult time for me without going into details. I have already asked that we maybe spend the night away this weekend at least one night. The following weekend we will be going to see our daughter in college for her 21st birthday.

The good news is - and I might have shared this recently - I can't even remember the last times I've shed tears about the A, so that's a testament in and of itself.

Although.... next week I have a comprehensive appointment set up with a "wellness specialist" in my area. I'm having all my chemical levels tested - hormones, thyroid, etc... as well as an EKG, bone density scan, and other stuff. After the appt I'll be going on a special cleansing diet and the doctor will recommend what supplements I should take and possibly bio-identical hormones. Part of the program is meeting with a nutritionist as well. I'm really excited to get going with this! It's a very comprehensive, holistic approach to staving off some of the side effects of aging.
[/quote]

if this works, I'll be ALL EARS!

So far my method of staving off aging involves copious amount sof wine at dinner.

Sorry you are on the eve of antiversaries, but I agree that THIS year is sooooooo much better.

Here's to us and our recovery. Full recoveries!

HA HA!!! I like your coping mechanism.

I hope that you have some special plans for the night to try and reclaim this date! It would be nice if you'd update your thread too. (hint, hint) Although - I know sometimes being here a lot can be a trigger at times.

I'll post about my experiences on this new program, I'm sure. It seems very Dr. Oz like. I'm so tired of being tired - and I have no idea where my once veracious libido went! I want it back! H has been so great about it all.