This morning I saw a new thread by a bleeding BS, plaintively asking for support and guidance. I noted that there had been 14 "views" before me, with no responses. I did respond, typing in my usual tortured two-finger style. When I finished and submitted, I found the "views" had grown to 37, and remained there until HDW added his help, roughly eighty minutes after the thread was started. There were over 20 members online during this period.

So 35 other folks here read the subject post, and whatever portion of members were among that group, not one had the compassion to as much as say, "I'm sorry for your pain, hang on, help is coming", even if they were unsure of their ability to offer the help?

Go ahead, fire away! Tell me that I'm just being judgmental and opinionated again. I already know that. What does Mel's tag-line say, "You have enemies? Good...."? I'm not going to lose much sleep being criticized for telling any (unnamed) members who read the thread, without commiserating with the writer, that they missed an opportunity to support the MB mission.

In the time it took you to rant about this, you could have been helping one more bleeding BS.

Get off it, NG. You are no more compassionate than the rest of us.

Tell me, sweet lady, why would you have a "tracker" on my postings **edit**

You have a point. I have been guilty of reading but not posting, i know i can do better even if i am unable to help at the moment. I can at least acknowledge them until the ambulance/vets arrive.

NG, believe me I know how you feel. But when I feel myself slipping into arrogance about the behavior of others, I tell myself to knock it off. That is a dead end street to resentment because who the hell am I to tell others how to act? Since when do I set the standards? I don't.

I like to help others here, but sometimes I have nothing to say. I afford others that same respect.

Reading all of someone's postings is a feature built into the board.

http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=userposts&id=59058

Personally, I have a gigantic watchlist with 106 posters on it, at the moment. Looking at the people on there, I would think that people on it would be kind of thrilled to be classed with the likes of Pepperband, MelodyLane, maritalbliss, et al. But whatever, I guess it's a "tracker."


I will have you know that Prisca is extremely well trained.

Also, right now there are 17 registered and 166 guests online. We have historically had an enormous amount of readers versus posters on this website. We have a massive reading audience.

Many of those even call the radio show and say they have been reading for months. Many registered posters talk about how they read for months or years before they registered or posted. I know I did.

Any idiot can click on Active Topics and see your posts.

But thanks for the idea.

Maybe they don't know what to say.

Quote

Maybe they don't know what to say.

Or, maybe they "think" they know what to say and what they say is the wrong thing to say!
Guilty!!!!!

That too.

Or maybe they smell a troll

Or maybe they can tell the BS isn't going to listen

Or maybe they were doing a drive by and didn't have time

Or maybe they are "logged on" but not at the computer

Or maybe...

The # of views isn't necessarily the same as the # of posters either.

i'm w/logan. sometimes i look at a new thread and think "holy heck, i have *nothing* i can offer this poor poster," because the depth of their troubles is beyond my experience, and sometimes, comprehension. sometimes reading a new thread is like a shot to the gut, triggering very bad feelings on my end (nothing to do with the poster).

but i could definitely say welcome and hang on. thanks for the reminder, NG.

Okay, putting an end to this:

Letty and LR - I'm glad you will be more inclined to offer comfort even if specific tactics do not occur to you. Some of my widely thrown seed did evidently land on "good ground".....

BR - The "37" were people that opened the note; logged on and unviewing would not affect that number. No problem, though.

Mel, GO, BH, and Love... - "Sorry you're here; this site can help," does not require a degree from MB University. But no one can overstate your contributions here, so I know you were not in the 37.

************edit*********

I understand that there were 37 "views"...that does not mean that "37" unique individuals read the thread. It is possible that the 37 views came about because 4 people (or whatever #) opened and closed the thread 37 times. There is no way you can track how that 37 came to be since unregistered users can view too.

Well, Never Guessed, would it have been better if there were 37 replies of "I'm sorry you're going through this, someone will help you." If I made a thread and had a bunch of replys with 'I'm sorrys...someone will be by that can eventually help' I'd want people to stop responding until the person that could help responded.

As MB members, do you think it is a responsibility of a person to reply to every thread that they read? There are a ton of hurting people on here. Do you realize the amount of time it would take to drop into every thread for every member that was hurting and respond?

It's rare that someone makes a post and it doesn't get any responses. And those that can help a poster do stop by and help.

Rant on:

I love it when anonymous posters on an internet forum lob disrespectful judgement grenades my way or anybody's way, interpreting my/their actions or inactions according to their point of view.

Rant off.

Ooops. Wrong thread, right rant.

AM

Well .. in regards to the 37 views I think its a daily ount of sorts .. i have tested the theory out t osee if I could look at a thread more than once and have the counter go up each time i look at it. To no avail .. i believe looking only counts on the counter 1 time a day. At least from my experience and trying to see if the views of a thread go up from clicking it several times.

*shrugs*

.