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Originally Posted by bigdaddybo
I understand all this!I have read all the books.But he has not.So instead of being rude to him couldn't someone directed him where to go to get help.All I can say if I had a problem and read this thread.there is no way in heck I would ask for help.I would be scared to death.And we know how it is when your heart is broke!And you admit defeat and reach out for help.Do we really want a forum that people are scared to be honest and reach out.You acted happy that you ran him off........not good
Where would you suggest we direct him? He is dating a woman. He's not married. This is a Marriage site. Suggestions, please?


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No,no I don't! But I can tell him that in about one sentence.And not be rude.And act like I care,even if its just acting,lol .You know what I mean. Hey bob read this,go here.and let us know what happens.Some where very nice,but some where just plain creeps!!!

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Man what happened to this place? It use to be so full of nice people
What's your story, big daddy? You appear to have been here before.

ETA: I'm not sure why you think there aren't nice people here.

Last edited by maritalbliss; 09/08/12 07:08 PM.

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Originally Posted by bigdaddybo
No,no I don't! But I can tell him that in about one sentence.And not be rude.And act like I care,even if its just acting,lol .You know what I mean. Hey bob read this,go here.and let us know what happens.Some where very nice,but some where just plain creeps!!!
If someone was out of hand anyone can notify the MODs and the MODS will do their job.

I know we have directed FarmerBob to read BRF and few other articles.

So what else would you suggest for him to read or do?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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I would bet BD may have been here BEFORE the hard line on adultery...

When everyone was nicey-nice.


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
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really? You don't think that his needs her needs or a lot of this can't apply to dating folks as well as married.So ur all saying,if ur dating u just hope it doesn't happen and if it does,run far and fast!!!! Come on now! I am sure there is a bunch of really smart people on here.way smarter than me.and I am sure we can do better than,cut and run.have a nice day bob.better luck next time.I read all 14 pages of the thread and there was some good ideas and comments.I was just wondering why it got to calling names and stuff so fast..by the way I love this place and it really did save my marriage.And this is the first time I have ever commented.it just kind of rubbed me the wrong way

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Originally Posted by bigdaddybo
No,no I don't! But I can tell him that in about one sentence.And not be rude.And act like I care,even if its just acting,lol .You know what I mean. Hey bob read this,go here.and let us know what happens.Some where very nice,but some where just plain creeps!!!
Oookay....whatever. We aren't "acting,LOL" bigdaddy. No, you're not funny. And we DO care, even though you don't.

By the way, what are you doing here? What is your point?


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Dating is the interview. Generally if you cheat while dating you probably won't improve.

If someone crashes their car a lot while learning to drive you do not give them a license.


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
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by the way I love this place and it really did save my marriage.And this is the first time I have ever commented.it just kind of rubbed me the wrong way
Tell us what it is that you love about this place.


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see just like that!!!! Taking something and making a big deal out of it.and I am here the same reason you are here.no wait a minute,no I am not!I don't want to attack people or make them feel stupid for not writing something right!!!!!!! And my point is........be nice!!!!!!!! Its pretty easy......For some!

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Here's a good clip on cheating before married.
Radio clip on cheating before marraige


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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That I am not divorced because of the great people who gave me advice.And for telling me what to read and where to go for info.......not for people like you!!!!

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Originally Posted by bigdaddybo
really? You don't think that his needs her needs or a lot of this can't apply to dating folks as well as married.So ur all saying,if ur dating u just hope it doesn't happen and if it does,run far and fast!!!! Come on now! I am sure there is a bunch of really smart people on here.way smarter than me.and I am sure we can do better than,cut and run.have a nice day bob.better luck next time.I read all 14 pages of the thread and there was some good ideas and comments.I was just wondering why it got to calling names and stuff so fast..by the way I love this place and it really did save my marriage.And this is the first time I have ever commented.it just kind of rubbed me the wrong way
That is a great book, but I promise you and Fall in Love and Stay in love is more for dating.

Buyers, Renters and Freeloaders is an excellent book.


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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Why do I foresee a locking in this thread's future?

FILSIL and BRaF are better for dating than the other books MB endorses.


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
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Listen I didn't comment to start a big fight I just felt bad for the guy.So I am sorry and moving on.And I'll delete myself from here a read like a ghost again.And my deal,I have been married 20 years.And i have been faithful everyday.

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Originally Posted by bigdaddybo
see just like that!!!! Taking something and making a big deal out of it.and I am here the same reason you are here.no wait a minute,no I am not!I don't want to attack people or make them feel stupid for not writing something right!!!!!!! And my point is........be nice!!!!!!!! Its pretty easy......For some!
Dang, son. I'm sorry, I can't see one word in your post that is helpful to this poster, so I'm going to notify the mods because you're disrupting his thread.

Have a nice day.

See? That was nice. smile


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Thanks brain hurts, my son is in a serious relationship he is twenty.I have been looking for a good book to get them.I'll check it out

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Originally Posted by bigdaddybo
Listen I didn't comment to start a big fight I just felt bad for the guy.So I am sorry and moving on.And I'll delete myself from here a read like a ghost again.And my deal,I have been married 20 years.And i have been faithful everyday.
You're not starting a big fight. I'm not sure where you got that idea.

We're taking care of this poster. Thank you for your comments.


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Originally Posted by bigdaddybo
Thanks brain hurts, my son is in a serious relationship he is twenty.I have been looking for a good book to get them.I'll check it out
Also check out these.
Choosing the Right One to Marry #1
Living together Before marriage

Also Dr. H loves to have questions from daters and engaged so they can learn before they M.

You can start your own thread and I know you'd get wonderful advice.


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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My wife had difficulty moving past an old sort-of-boyfriend where they had a deep emotional "soulmate" connection, but no physical relationship, back when we were dating.

If I had been paying an ounce of attention, I would have figured out back then I was about to propose to someone who likes to have emotional affairs/get her emotional needs met from more than 1 guy at a time.

If FarmerBob pays attention, he'll figure out he's shacking up with a woman who does not like to be sexually exclusive to a boyfriend. Personally I don't see a huge issue there, as I feel sex outside of marriage is wrong, but that's just my own personal belief. I do feel it's unreasonable to expect a girlfriend to have sex with you, but get upset and post to Marriage Builders forums when she has sex with someone else.


BH (me), age 30. Plan D final 1/1/13
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