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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
When I refer to your relationship, I mean a unhealthy codependent relationship.
You can't gradually get away from her.
You have to get away from her completely with no future contact.
Otherwise it will always be a tugging back and forth
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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Member
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
Jeff.
I am going to post a daily message for you from AlAnon literature. It has helped me a lot. ; I hope you will also find it to be helpful
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
Jeff,
Have you been to a meeting?
Are you going to one tonight?
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
Jeff, please consider this daily message: (it is written for a spouse of an alcoholic. The spouse is codependent on the alcoholic. You can remove the word alcohol and insert your wife's name):
Why do I waste my precious time and energy trying to figure out what makes an alcoholic drink--why he doesn't consider his family, his obligations, his reputation? All I need to know is that he suffers from a disease--alcoholism, the compulsion to drink. Why shouldn't I have compassion for him and his illness when I am so ready to feel sorry for people who have other diseases? Do I blame them? Why do I blame him? Can I cure him by reproaching him? Can I look into his heart and realize the true nature of his sufferings?
Today's Reminder
The fact that I am the spouse, child, parent, or friend of an alcoholic does not give me the right to control him. I can only make the situation worse by treating him like an irresponsible naughty child.
On this day I promise God and myself that I will let go of the problem which is destroying my peace of mind. I pray for detachment from the situtation, but not from the suffering drinker who may be helped to find the way to sobriety through the change in my attitude and the love and compassion I am able to express.
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
Jeff are you still using this forum?
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
Member
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Member
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
Jeff are you still using this forum? Jeff how are you?
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
Member
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Member
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
Jeff,
Do you still subscribe to your thread?
What's going on?
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