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Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 1,709
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Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 1,709 |
What happened was that she lacked intimacy and it led to what happened, Can you change and begin to meet her needs? Have you told her that you want a loving and caring marriage with her. You should be in PLAN A where you show her that you can change. Have you read Dr Harley's ten basic concepts? That is your map for a strong and loving marriage. Basic ConceptsIt takes commitment and NC for LIFE with OM.
ME: BW
HIM: FWH
Married 18 yrs
DDay 09/2008 and 12/2008
Recovered
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,479 Likes: 6
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,479 Likes: 6 |
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 633
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 633 |
she argued if she left her job, and we break up she is left with nothing, not until we get passed all this and knows her marriage is safe she will then leave, its the advice her mother gave us, I'm still having an issue with this. I gave her a decision, its either me or the job.. she spoke to her mom, and somehow it got turned on me, What happened was that she lacked intimacy and it led to what happened, but she said she should of not done it and its remorseful, but said im immature for making her quit cause we do not work it out she is out of a job, I seem to be blamed for what has happened and I do not think i could handle it. I think a divorce will be hard, but probably easier then what I feeling now, Your marriage wont ever be SAFE until she or the co-worker leaves the job. MIL needs to stay out of it!!! This is you and your wife right now and no one else!
Last edited by fifteenyears; 11/16/12 08:06 PM.
Me (WS) Husband (BS)
DS - 15
DD -10
My D-day - 11/12/11
Today Me (BS) H (WS)
D-Day #2 01/14/12
I don't want to just survive my affair, I want to recover from it!
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