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So many notes flying in - I was addressing OJ's note proposing being whiny and needy. Which one?
Me: BH, 28
WW, 26
Married September 2005
D-Day: April 7, 2013
A started in February, 2013, and is ongoing
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edit 2: With her this furious - and she will be furious for a good while about this one - should I invite her to my party this saturday? hun, just wanted to invite you to a housewarming party this weekend. We would love to have you! Good time for all! hugs....  edit: the above is a suggested TEXT.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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He's 28!! He doesn't know what a martini is!!
It's like a chocolate milk, only with gin instead of milk and vermouth instead of Hershey's chocolate syrup! Shaken, not stirred!
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So she is obviously going to be leaving tonight. So what is my next step?
edit: nevermind, next step is wait for divorce papers, then tell her all that stuff you told me to tell her
edit 2: With her this furious - and she will be furious for a good while about this one - should I invite her to my party this saturday? I don't think she's going to leave. I don't think she has anywhere to go. Sure - tell her she is absolutely welcome to come to your party. Tell her it's going to be a blast, and you'll enjoy having her there. I don't think her fury is going to last as long as you think. She's painted herself into a corner.
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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Be strong and calm, OJ!! We are here for you. You are doing just fine, son.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Well she took off with some bare essentials. Not sure where. I don't know if OM has his new apartment or not.
Me: BH, 28
WW, 26
Married September 2005
D-Day: April 7, 2013
A started in February, 2013, and is ongoing
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Well she took off with some bare essentials. Not sure where. I don't know if OM has his new apartment or not. Well, you definitely made things very hard for her tonight, which is a good thing. I would go change the sheets, clean up the room and take it over. You did great! 
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Should I pack her stuff for her? She only took some essentials.
Me: BH, 28
WW, 26
Married September 2005
D-Day: April 7, 2013
A started in February, 2013, and is ongoing
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Should I pack her stuff for her? She only took some essentials. I wouldn't. But you can text her an invitation to your party.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Well she took off with some bare essentials. Not sure where. I don't know if OM has his new apartment or not. Just making sure: have you cut off all jointly-owned credit cards, or any other mutually-owned sources of funds? We've had waywards clean out accounts before. If she wants to run off in some dramatic display, it needs to be from a source other than co-owned funds.
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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Yes, we've separated our bank accounts and credit cards.
Me: BH, 28
WW, 26
Married September 2005
D-Day: April 7, 2013
A started in February, 2013, and is ongoing
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Should I pack her stuff for her? She only took some essentials. I wouldn't. But you can text her an invitation to your party. I will, but when do you think? Right now obviously not, ya?
Me: BH, 28
WW, 26
Married September 2005
D-Day: April 7, 2013
A started in February, 2013, and is ongoing
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I would do it now because I don't want her to think her little tantrum affected you in any way, shape or form. If she believes her tantrum worked, she will be emboldened. And by reaching out to her you are showing care and compassion. "hun, I am sure sorry you felt like leaving. You are free to stay with me! And if you don't feel like it, please accept my invitation to come to my housewarming party this weekend. Luv, OJ"
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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a follow up text: "Saturday at 6:00. Hamburgers and beer! Dress casual.."
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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...and oh, yes, ask where she's staying so you can drop off the dog!
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She took the dog when she left.
Me: BH, 28
WW, 26
Married September 2005
D-Day: April 7, 2013
A started in February, 2013, and is ongoing
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I sent those 2 texts Melody - slightly modified to make them sound like they were coming from me.
And by the way, I've been adding "Love, Kinsels" at the end of every text - Kinsels is the nickname she made up for me. It's not my real name. Is that good to use that "pet name"?
Me: BH, 28
WW, 26
Married September 2005
D-Day: April 7, 2013
A started in February, 2013, and is ongoing
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That is a very nice touch!
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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What odds she's heading over to the NEW house, expecting to let herself in there?
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What odds she's heading over to the NEW house, expecting to let herself in there? 20 to 1?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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