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Marriage Builders Forums Infidelity In Recovery Trying so hard to recover

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Re: Trying so hard to recover danil89 #2817066 08/26/14 07:04 AM
Joined: Apr 2001 Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 Texas M MelodyLane Member
MelodyLane Member M Joined: Apr 2001 Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 Texas	Originally Posted by danil89 I understand this, but I also have to continue to provide a life for us, we have a mortgage and bills and I cant just up and leave our income. With all due respect, you have dragged this out for 6 months now so you have had plenty of time to find a job. That is an unbelievably long time to ask someone to go through hell. You said earlier you were looking for "a better job." You don't have the luxury to be selective when your marriage is on the rocks. I am also concerned that you seem to be ignoring the issue of the exposure to the OM's wife. You have a moral obligation to ensure that she is informed of your actions with her husband. You can't claim to be the slightest bit remorseful when your other victim doesn't even know what you have done. "It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101

Re: Trying so hard to recover danil89 #2817074 08/26/14 07:53 AM
Joined: Mar 2010 Posts: 7,363 Likes: 3 P Prisca Member
Prisca Member P Joined: Mar 2010 Posts: 7,363 Likes: 3	Originally Posted by danil89 I hope that showing him I am activeley looking for alternative employment will show that he is my number 1 priority. Is there anything else I can be doing/saying that is going to make this process any easier for him? Hope is not a plan. Hope will fail. Markos' Wife FWW - EA 8 kids ... What to do with an Angry Husband

Re: Trying so hard to recover danil89 #2817115 08/26/14 10:39 AM
Joined: Mar 2011 Posts: 1,709 P pokerface Member
pokerface Member P Joined: Mar 2011 Posts: 1,709	Originally Posted by danil89 I dont know what I can do to continue moving forward and I dont know how to help him. I wish I could really make him understand what he means to me and keep moving forward! It is all about your ACTIONS and continuing to go to work everyday where you can have contact with OM is just digging the hole deeper. Not to mention the fact that OM has not been exposed or held accountable in any way. It is just business as usual for OM who is free to continue to pursue you and assault your marriage without anyone being the wiser. To a betrayed spouse it feels like being spit in the face with no hope because you cannot find a better job. Maintaining the status quo will not save your marriage and may very likely be the death of it. You have only been married three years and have no children. How long would YOU endure watching your WS go off to work with their affair partner everyday? ME: BW HIM: FWH Married 18 yrs DDay 09/2008 and 12/2008 Recovered

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